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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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12
MrsTerryPratchett · 30/09/2023 19:54

@Kemper the US is struggling with many of the key indicators of a healthy, civilised country. That's not really debatable.

ghostyslovesheets · 30/09/2023 19:57

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/09/2023 19:54

@Kemper the US is struggling with many of the key indicators of a healthy, civilised country. That's not really debatable.

well exactly -most civilised countries recognise women as functioning adults with bodily autonomy and the ability to make their own medical decision for a start

SkippingOnSand · 30/09/2023 20:03

I'll tell you what pisses me off the most....
That a woman becomes pregnant by a man, then a man tells her whether she's going to have that baby or not.
Well I'll tell you what Mr Man, you want this baby? Fine, you can bloody have it. I'll leave it on your doorstep for you to raise while I get on with my life!
What's that? You can't raise it? Why not? You expect me to.
Oh I see, because you want to continue your child free life, while I get saddled with rearing it, because I'm a woman!!
Tell you what though Mr Man, you'd soon change your tune if every woman kept her legs clamped shut and denied you sex because she feared getting pregnant and had to go through with it, wouldn't you!
It pisses me off no end.

randomrandom · 30/09/2023 20:16

Recently, Mitchell has been helping pioneerr* a strategy to pass local ordinances that would make it illegal to transport someone along a city or county’s road for an abortion
Seriously 🤯

Olindia · 30/09/2023 20:16

Absolutely agree skippingonsand
but don’t forget the judging and ridicule single mums receive from some men (because obviously they got them selves pregnant)

SkippingOnSand · 30/09/2023 20:22

Olindia · 30/09/2023 20:16

Absolutely agree skippingonsand
but don’t forget the judging and ridicule single mums receive from some men (because obviously they got them selves pregnant)

Absolutely agree.
This pisses me off too.

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/09/2023 20:22

randomrandom · 30/09/2023 20:16

Recently, Mitchell has been helping pioneerr* a strategy to pass local ordinances that would make it illegal to transport someone along a city or county’s road for an abortion
Seriously 🤯

Which won't make a difference to rich women. But will prevent poor women from having a choice.

lochmaree · 30/09/2023 20:24

I was trying to find out exactly what a D&E entails a few days ago but I couldn't find out if there is any medication involved to make the foetus heart stop before the procedure. The pro life 'side' have some awful descriptions of what happens in a D&E (and not late stage either, early to mid 2nd trimester) including from a man who has done many. But the only other source of info, pro choice and NHS etc, didn't go into detail. I also discovered that a foetus can feel pain possibly as early as 10 weeks.

I am pro choice. But I feel like I am not as far over to that side as some are. but when push comes to shove that's where I'd be.

CantFindTheBeat · 30/09/2023 20:50

MrsTerryPratchett · 30/09/2023 19:38

It DOESN'T matter if it's a collection of cells or a baby. It really doesn't. You can't force a woman to go through a pregnancy and labour if she doesn't want to. It's barbaric. And it doesn't work because all that happens is women either travel or if they are prevented, they source illegal and unsafe abortions where they are.

Really, compare the countries with free, legal, safe abortion and those where it's illegal in all cases. Nicaragua has many more abortions than Switzerland they are just unsafe and women and girls die.

If you don't like abortions, campaign for free contraception, good sex education and women's rights. Your rates will go down.

This is how you can tell it's not about abortion, it's about controlling women. If it was about reducing abortion, they'd be in favour of contraception, woman's rights and sex ed. But they aren't.

And if posters don't want an abortion, I will go to the barricades to make sure you never have one. But don't prevent other women from making their own decisions.

👏👏👏👏👏

pointythings · 30/09/2023 21:19

@MrsTerryPratchett well said. This is why I object to the term 'pro-abortion'. If the people who want safe, legal abortion were 'pro-abortion', we would be pushing for legislation forcing women to have abortions even when they were pregnant with a much wanted baby, taking away their freedom of choice and their bodily autonomy. I can't think of any group that would do anything resembling that - oh wait, I can...

DdraigGoch · 30/09/2023 22:00

Siameasy · 30/09/2023 19:24

I think that’s pretty dismissive. The fetus is alive and can move around. Google a 10 week fetus and you’ll see it’s a baby, just small. Funny how when a baby is unwanted it’s suddenly ok to be dismissive about killing it. Also funny how no one ever reacts to a positive pregnancy test by saying “we’re expecting a collection of cells”. That’s because you know full well it’s a baby.
The pro-abortionists language is like that of the trans lobby and their top surgery bottom surgery nonsense, deliberately obfuscating. Just call things what they are.

Texans don't seem to care about 10 year olds being shot at school so it baffles me why they're so concerned about a 10 week old foetus' right to life.

Babochan88 · 30/09/2023 22:42

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pointythings · 30/09/2023 22:46

Banning abortion kills women. If you're OK with that, you have no moral compass.

DoesMaryNotDrive · 30/09/2023 22:47

I read the article but didn’t really understand.

Can someone explain please?

Is abortion banned in Texas or allowed up to 6 weeks? And someone is asking for the details of every abortion performed since 2021?

OnTheBoardwalk · 30/09/2023 22:53

@Babochan88 I absolutely get that this is what you believe and I respect that. You can’t however force your beliefs on every woman in the world. How would that work?

ginandtonicwithlimes · 30/09/2023 22:59

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How is it murder when the embryo can't survive outside the body? 🤔

Insommmmnia · 30/09/2023 23:06

Abortions rose in the UK after the 2 child cap on child benefits.

Yet weirdly I've never seen a UK pro-forced birth campaigner raising awareness of this or petioning the government to remove the cap

Because they don't care how the baby is paid for, or what poverty it will grow up in or any thing else about its life. Only about restricting women's choices.

I have zero time for that.

ghostyslovesheets · 30/09/2023 23:12

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My body My rules trumps your right to dictate what I can medically do - don't like termination - don't have one - but your beliefs don't trump anyone else's - nor does it trump their rights to safe health care

Iam4eels · 30/09/2023 23:19

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jeaux90 · 30/09/2023 23:22

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GTF. My body my rules.!

Iam4eels · 30/09/2023 23:25

It will never be possible to ban abortions, you can only ever ban safe abortions. For as long as pregnancy has existed, abortion has existed. The difference is though that prior to legalisation women would use unsafe methods such as "falling" down stairs, taking large amounts of drugs (legal and illegal), attempting to rupture the amniotic sac using sharp implements, visiting backstreet abortionists with poor hygiene and no aftercare, etc. Women died and it is still a leading cause of female death worldwide.

Banning it doesn't save ickle wickle bay-bees who will go on to have happy, sunshine lives full of rainbow and kittens.

It kills women.

AngelinaFibres · 30/09/2023 23:27

I have a friend who had to have a termination at 12 weeks. She went to have her first scan for dates etc. The babies heart wasn't forming properly. She was told that the pregnancy would almost certainly proceed to full term but that the baby would die at, or shortly after, birth. She had a termination. If she had lived in many American states she would have been required to carry on with the pregnancy, knowing that she would never get to take her baby home. Absolutely madness

BIossomtoes · 30/09/2023 23:30

I don’t know about madness @AngelinaFibres, it would be the height of cruelty. Thank goodness our attitudes are more compassionate. Your poor friend.

Thelnebriati · 30/09/2023 23:34

The number one cause of death for pregnant women in the US is their partner, and they have the worst rates of maternal mortality in the developed world. A society that really cared about an unborn fetus would have better standards of healthcare, maternity leave, housing and benefits. It would tackle violence against pregnant women, and rape. If you are advocating to limit abortions and criminalise women before fixing any of those problems, you are just a disgusting authoritarian.

theresastormcoming · 30/09/2023 23:34

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