The mum didn’t remember me.

[Getfromoutmeroad]

Weird, slightly awkward incident.

Dd started school last year, I saw a few mums at pick, exchange pleasantries etc, there isn’t really a big group of mum friends there, which I’m fine with as I have my friends outside of that, most of them with kids who Dd is friends with.
Dd had her birthday party at the end of the year, I invited all the class, lots came and it was a nice day. One of the mums I’ve said hi to came, my Dd likes her son, I chatted to her at the party, offered drinks etc, she was nice but didn’t join in massively, which is fine and I totally get it.
Saw her the last few days, said hi etc, then today my Dd wants to walk out with her Ds, they walk out holding hands which was very sweet, so we start to chat and then she asks if my dd started this year or if she was in school last year 🤷🏻‍♀️I was a bit surprised and confused and said that she was here last year.
Now I’m thinking I must be so unmemorable 😂how can you literally forget a person whose party you went to
Felt so awkward

I do still find it weird, it wasn’t just some random kids party, it was my child’s, that she was invited to 😅I’ve seen her outside the class most days

My DD has just started reception and I'm struggling to remember faces. A couple of people have said "hi" in a familiar way while I've been out and about in our village and I think they must be other parents I just haven't recognised out of context. For me, chronic sleep deprivation probably doesn't help. I really hope they don't think I'm being rude 😬

I was invited to dinner with a woman I really like. Just six of us at her house. Had a brilliant time. A few days later she utterly blanked me. She has seriously bad facial recognition. It's quite common.

DD is in nursery and we went to four or five birthday parties last year and I’ll be honest, I’m not sure I’d recognise all the parents again.

Do you look slightly different for school runs OP?
I wear my glasses and hair tied up for the school run but would make effort for my child's party i.e. hair down and blow dried, make up, contact lenses in etc..

This. I am unrecogniseable at parties as I don’t wear my glasses, make an effort, wear make up.

I’m totally the mum. It gets even worse once you have two kids at the school and there are maybe two or three parties a month.I can remember some of the parents from my eldest DC year because they lived along the road from me and we’d walk together if we were all heading in the same direction at the same time, but I probably couldn’t pick the parents of my youngest DC’s cohort out if they were in a police line up. Mind you, I worked almost full time and only did pick up once or twice a week.

I always remember people but no one ever remembers me. It used to upset me but now I find it amusing.

A neighbour of mine told me she doesn’t recognise people out of context.

I’ve spoken to her outside my house several times but seen her walking in the town, seen her at the vets - blatantly doesn’t realise she knows me 😂

I wore make up for Dds party, but don’t generally for the school run, perhaps I am pretty non descript…as a pp mentioned them being, I’m also 40 something, long dark hair etc etc

This is me. I’m basically face blind. I’m always telling people we’ve never met just as they are saying so nice to see you again. It isn’t personal!

You probably just looked a lot different at the party than you do at the school gates because you were done up

There's a lovely mum at my DS school who always seems to look different when I see her. Glasses one time and not the next. Curly hair then straight hair. Normal clothes then work uniform. Looks different wearing different styles of make up. I've spoken to her at length before but it never clicks who it is until she reminds me she's "johns" mum. I feel quite daft about it.

I have face blindness and really struggle. You wouldn't know to look at me. But I have had so many odd looks from people that I must have I've been blanking over the years.
I sort of know I should know them but it can take weeks of ruminating and recall to try to place them.
I was the same with the mums at school. If they are waiting at school I have extra clues as to who they are. If they come up to me and start talking I can recall conversations in an instant. And after a bit it links up and recognise them.

The same mum if I saw her in town I wouldn't know her. I must appear so rude.

She could have face blindness

My DD can talk to someone and then not remember them an hour later

I wouldn’t remember a parent from that long ago if I hadn’t spoken to them regularly since, and I’m pretty good at remembering faces. So I don’t think it’s odd really.

I thanked the wrong mum at the first all-class birthday party DS went to in Reception. I’d spoken to the party mum several times over the previous few months. DH had to drag me away and point out the right person (to be fair they both look similar, but they aren’t identical at all).

I’m just not that good with faces 🤷‍♀️

Ive been that idiot!!
I actually went round to someones
house with my ds, had a coffee, chatted for a few hours, the kids were having a brilliant time. I’d met this mum at the school gates before as well. 2 weeks later I saw her in town, she said hi and I honestly had no clue who she was - I assumed she went to my spin class (?!) so started talking about the previous Sundays session.

Tbh I meet a lot of people and my brain gets very confused at times!

Similar thing happened to me, a male friend was seeing a woman for a few months, and during that time, she had attended barbecues, parties, and get togethers with our friendship group and we often chatted. About a year later I was at the hospital where she works and said hello, she said "sorry, do I know you?" I was quite surprised, if I'd only met her once I could understand it, but we basically spent the last summer socialising on a frequent basis.

It's interesting that you immediately jump to the conclusion that she must think you are boring. A person with more confidence might think it was her with the issue.

Tbh when my dd was younger I just remembered the kids, never the adults until I got to know the adults better.

The same here.

I would be the other mum and it would have absolutely nothing to do with you but my memory. I have a good memory for facts and things but names and faces I can't retain.

I use a terrible memory for faces. It's actually facial blindness - it's a real thing. Don't be so harsh - it's awful to live with, and mortifying when things like this happen (which for me is all the time).

I would do this. I really struggle with face blindness and noticing people when out and about. I’m in my own world most of the time and not looking at people. It’s hard because people think I’m ignoring them but I really didn’t see them.

as an example, drove past my neighbours who I’ve lived next door to for 10 years earlier. Looked at them and didn’t click it was them till they’d gone past.