Friend has said she couldn’t be friends with me if I took the job

[lnterviewWoes]

I’ve been offered a really fascinating job that would involve a lot of travel and meeting lots of interesting people.

It involves working for a former politician. Not directly but closely. I don’t support most of their views but the role is independent of their politics.

I have a small group of close friends. I told one friend and she’s said she couldn’t be friends with me if I took it, which has really dampened things. It also comes with a 20% wage increase. I want to take the role but I don’t want to lose one of my oldest friends. I’m really not sure what to do.

@Lastchancechica "To say you can only be friends with people that share exactly the same values as you (impossible by the way) just makes you sound like a rigid, intolerant bigot living in an echo chamber."

I'm not saying that. What I am saying that there are people/organisations that are so repugnant to me that I would struggle to stay close to someone who worked for them.

I think she’s not a good friend.
I also think I couldn’t work for Nigel Farage or Marine le Penn, even if my job was independent of their politics views…I would be questioning whether that is really true, even if they say it is. X

This .

I have never, ever liked - let alone loved - Russell Brand!! I've always found him creepy and sleazy.

Take the job. It sounds like you’re going to have plenty of opportunities to broaden your friendship group anyway with an interesting job. Go for it and let your friendship be damned. Who needs such a judgemental friend anyway and she may not even carry out her threat (and if she does, meh).

This is crazy! I don't care who my friend works for as long as she's safe and paid enough to cover her bills. I'd love to be able to turn down a pay increase over politics, but not everyone is in such a privileged position.

A lot of ex-politicians do end up in jobs that have little to do with their politics. If I was offered a job at the British Museum or Evening Standard, I wouldn't turn them down because both are led by George Osborne. I wouldn't accept a job at the George Osborne Foundation, set up to espouse the views of George Osborne, however. So it really does depend on what the actual organisation does.

I would lose respect for a friend if they worked for Tommy Robinson, for example. But I wouldn’t give them an ultimatum.

I would disapprove but I wouldn’t threaten to end the friendship. I might find I naturally start distancing myself if it really affected me but I wouldn’t be so arrogant as to say upfront to a friend take the job and I’ll sever our friendship.

Well the only controversial politician that offers jobs like this is Tony Blair as he has a think tank. Obviously not Nigel Farage.

i wouldn’t want to work for him (just read up on the advisory work he does for dictators and not even mentioning the war) but I also think your friend is being unreasonable.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2023/sep/17/tony-blair-institute-rise

Could equally say it's a privilege to be able to overlook politics.

It depends, if its Nigel Farage then I would struggle to be friends with someone who worked for him. Totally depends on who it is. Only you yourself will know if it's someone completely awful.

"It involves working for a former politician. Not directly but closely. I don’t support most of their views but the role is independent of their politics."

Sorry, but that is very naive.

I think you're crazy!

You wouldn't care if your friend worked for a fascist or a mobster?

Nigel Farage is developing a website to help people who have been debanked as he was. How very evil

Politicians are unusual because we know what most of their views are. I am pretty sure if you knew that much about the opinions of pretty much any other boss then you would find you disagreed with them on the lot of issues. And it is also OK to have different views and still be friends / colleagues. It is actually really important to be able to do this. Take the job. It sounds fab.

Is it just me or does anyone else yearn for the days when you could have a friendly debate with others about anything at all, without someone shrieking like a banshee if you say something or vote for someone, or read a newspaper they disapprove of?
Oh happy days 😉

I know. Unfortunately the Brexit debate started a lot of it.

Honestly no, I don't yearn for the days when bigotry and hate had to be tolerated. Debate shouldn't have to mean absolute tolerance and absence of personal boundaries.
Most people can tolerate difference of opinion, but there's limits.
You want to vote conservative? I can live with that. You think Nick Griffin is brilliant? Absoluty no thanks.
There's nothing friendly about certain beliefs.

One born every minute.

@Oliotya who said anything about bigotry and hate?

God, you see how this starts. You can't even have a thread without people shoehorning praise or contempt on certain political figures.

That's why we can't have nice debates any more because people can't confine themselves. They have to tell you.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-66354476
I'm simply reporting a fact. Do you think it's a cover for evil doings? It happened to him, Gina Miller and many other people.
I don't support Nigel Farage's politics and I firmly believed in Remain.

Congrats on the job offer

My guess is the job is with the Tony Blair Institute. I couldn't work for them.

Frankly I would judge you working for them and any future employer is going to form an opinion of you because his name is on your cv. Some may like it but I suspect many will not. You will be eliminated unfairly as a result.

Your friend is still horrible for her attitude