To display a boudoir photograph with a child in the home?

[Notgoingononlyfansyet]

I ‘won’ one of those boudoir shoots and bought some pictures. It was just a bit of a fun, but the pictures are AMAZING. They honestly make me feel capable of anything and really brought home to me that everyday me isn’t all I can be. That with a little extra expertise and resource I can do something very, very different. It’s such a great concept to get my head around and apply in general. (Also, I look smoking hot and who doesn’t love that?!)

I really want to display some of the pictures. They aren’t tacky or sleazy. I’m wearing more that I was on the beach last month. Full Bra, brazillian pants, and a jacket in some shots. No stockings, thongs or bondage type undies. No handcuffs, but some hobby props (a hat and a book. Some pearls) She sees me naked all the time (but I respect her privacy however she prefers and I don’t brazenly wander about naked. We have dogs that open doors, it’s unavoidable, not deliberate or overtly liberal. She locks the bathroom, but will happily yell for me to get her a towel etc. All no big deal in an all girl household) But the pics are overtly sensual. I don’t have a partner and her father is permanently out of the picture for over than a decade. I do sometimes date and she knows about that in age appropriate detail.

My biggest concern is that she will connect it with my dating (which is fairly new and not unconnected in that both are because I feel more sexy than I have for years) but it’s not that dating leads to needing to change to be attractive for dates. It’s feeling more attractive and exploring that through dating AND how I present myself now I have a bit more freedom from lone parenting. How much do I share?! Is it creepy? Is it tacky, even though the pic itself isn’t? Or is it empowering and celebrating myself? (I could have one without my face in and make put it’s not me, but that seems even weirder!)

I’m not going to hang it in the sitting room, but she’ll see it often in my room. So will her friends as they come in and out of her room, because the only blank wall faces the door and our dogs open the door. We’ll have to have at least a chat about not telling my mother/all the neighbours/the greengrocer’s cat about it, what to say to her friends and not to let them photograph it! I just don’t think she’ll get it. I wouldn’t have got it at her age. (I wouldn’t have got it 12 months ago!). Is it unreasonable to expect her to get it with the right framing or should I wait? Until
when?!

All views welcome, but be polite! (Apologies for length, I’m thinking out loud)

Just read the posts please

Well this conversation has taken a rather unpleasant turn.

I've quoted what I contributed early on in the thread. To add some context, I have been a life model for art classes, so there are images of my naked body, in all manner of poses, all over the world. I daresay that is more than most people here, including those who bizarrely try to ascribe jealousy or puritanical tendencies to those who disagree with them.

Some of those drawings and paintings are full works; some are studies focused on a specific play of musculature, or the exact shadings of a patch of freckled skin, or on quickly capturing form mid-movement. Some work will have gone straight into recycling, or been used as kindling for the fire; some will be be scrap for phone numbers or shopping lists; some embellished by toddler artwork; some will be carefully stored in archive drawers or displayed in portfolios; some will be framed on walls and viewed by whomever; some will have been photographed, scanned, printed.

I doubt there is a more concentrated, sustained form of attention on a naked body than an artist painting, drawing, sculpting; yet it is simultaneously entirely detached and impersonal, focused solely on perception of light, colour, form, and techniques of representation. Not sexualised, no male gaze; just artists at work, learning and honing their craft.

My original comment stands.

Bemused by the vocal defenders of boudoir shoots on the thread. Boudoir shoots aren't outrageous or offensive, and no-one has said or implied they are on the thread, aside from regards to the 13 year old. I suspect the defenders would like the shoots to be seen as a bit subsversive as it bolsters their self-image as sexual free thinkers who hang out being liberal on the sex board.

These shoots aren't ground breaking and empowering, they are just a bit 'suburban sex people' and ludicrous. If you like them, get them done. It doesn't mean other people can't have the view that they are a bit silly.

Homer did.

😵

Ay caramba!

There’s a studio right next to my Aldi. As if you might just pop in on the way back 😭

Boudoir shoots aren't outrageous or offensive, and no-one has said or implied they are on the thread

Nobody who has even skimmed the thread could truthfully say that. OP has been called brazen, disgusting, insecure, fake, a liar, pathetic, ugly (in a veiled way) and attacked from all sides for doing the shoot - nothing at all to do with her daughter.

It's fine to say why you don't like them but please stop trying to pretend that people aren't expressing offence over them when there are 31 pages of it. It's just dishonest.

Certain people said posters were abusing the OP. All I've really said is they aren't natural and I prefer more natural photos. I really love my profile pic on Facebook. It's just me and my Husband sat together on a day out.

Posters have been called pearl clutches for not liking them.

These posters might be as kinky as fuck in the bedroom but just don't like boudoir photo shoots.

I've decided to stop engaging with a certain poster because they just twist everything I've said.

Oh all right, I did do a boudoir shoot once. But you must admit I look smoking.

Then why would I ask the question? Or change my mind having heard some of the responses?

Don't be so stupid.
FYI: Someone has had a comment deleted for saying someone else was thick @Notgoingononlyfansyet

You're the one who said it will be visible to visitors. So are you now saying it won't?

MMHQ - so OP using "stupid" is OK but me using "thick" gets my post deleted?

The whole thread is full of it! I'd be really, really interested to have an actual legal opinion on the photo. You definitely see worse on billboards. my 13 year old is seeing more sexual things all the time. It might be cringy for her to be reminded its me. It might even make her a bit private about her sexuality. But it is absolutely nothing remotely new. I'm telling you, none of you would look twice at it on a billboard.

But OP, why does stupid underwear make you feel empowered. Now if you'd had naked pictures and looked at them and said Wow I'm looking great I would be so chuffed for you. But to dress up in what the media peddles as the 'correct' way for women to look is just such a poor message for DD. It's the titaltion(sp?) that I find wrong. By all means get glamorous pictures of you naked and feel empowered by that!

There are many solicitors / counsel out there who are suitably qualified and experienced and would be well placed to give you a formal legal opinion.

You may be quite intelligent, I don't know. But the idea that dogs that can open a bedroom door make a house 'public' is plainly, well, stupid. I'm sick of pulling my punches. Nobody else is.

You have the posts confused OP

Ive had these photos taken.
They are displayed in my bedroom. There is no nudity. They are very sexy.
What is the issue. ?

I'd be really, really interested to have an actual legal opinion on the photo.

I'm sure you could find a genuine lawyer who could tell you. But I've never heard of a father getting done for having girly pictures on the garage wall or leaving the Sun open at page 3 (back in the day) on the dining table.

Something I do find bemusing about this debate is that it's highly likely at least some of the pps who are frothing about a boudoir shot being embarrassing for the DD are quite happy to embarrass their DC by letting them see them naked.

If he had pictures of himself provocatively posed it might be a different story.

Honestly? My Son has not seen me naked since he was a young boy. Definitely not as a teenager.

I realise most kids would rather not see their parents in that state. But if the issue is that it's supposedly child abuse to have any sexualised image in a place where a child might see it, what difference does it make who the model is?