To ask the last sentence you said aloud ?

[MrsMigginscoffee]

Just for fun as I've had to laugh at myself and remind myself I'm hormonal and it will pass. I just shouted ".oh fuck off Alexa you annoying bitch" as she ignored my request to stop a timer. AGAIN.
Anyone else slowly losing the plot?

Because they’re playing Scotland and not Ukraine.

In response to a TV commentator. We’re watching the match and Scotland are nowhere near as strong a side as Ukraine.

To my dog after getting her fresh water because she was panting hard, and bringing the bowl to her face so she doesn't have to get up: You don't want water now? You're a twat.

@Qwertyyui that was my mother's mantra.

"Go on then, have a wee"

To the dog.

@banggoestheweasel sending lots of virtual moral support your way, I might have to try the chucking the iPad in the river - we have the river Thames right next to our house 🤣

Herbert has moved in and should be paying rent 🥴

Shit! No I didn't, thank you for the reminder!

"220mls at 110mls/ph with a 20ml flush before and after."

Churchill's grandson!?! (Watching the bbc prog about Bexit)

Oh, so he's a vampire then

'She looks a lot younger there, that Zara' (watching the opening credits of today's Doctors).

I’m home alone this evening and I don’t talk to myself very much at all but I did mutter “Ugh, not THAT prick” when Joe Cole appeared on my TV screen during the football.

The last thing I said to another human being was “I bet I can work out who it was, I’m going full Wagatha Christie on this” to my DP in relation to a mystery at work.

"Get in the shower!"

To faffing teen.

"I thought it was computer generated"

Whilst watching the programme about 70s ad breaks and the balls bouncing down the San Francisco roads...

'Twice a week seems to be average apparently'
I'd just asked him the Q about the Romans from the other thread, he wanted to know the trend of the answers.

"Tennyson don't do that"

To the kitten.

Fucking hell, they're just killing everyone!

'I don't know, that young guy we liked on season 2 did it, yeah...yeah, the one who ate mice. Mind you, he was heavy... guess that's insulation'

Watching Alone with DH, tent vs shelter discussion

"Are you still watching the football?" to DH who is in a different room. He has confirmed he is watching the football but with the sound off.

"It's your reflection you eijit"!
Said to my 19 months old sprocker spaniel who was convinced the small black dog outside was staring at him. Forgot to shut the blinds 😂

"Night night darling" or something along those lines to DS1.

“Scotland is getting their arse handed to them”

"how often do you think about the Roman empire?"

No!

'Right that's enough now, I mean it'.

To ds 6...he's supposed to be going to sleep but keeps fiddling with his PJs and pulling his arm in and out of the sleeve.

‘I used to listen to this’ To 14 yo ds was playing Gypsy Woman, and TLC He couldn’t believe it when I sang along with him

'Go and find Pookie Pants he needs to go to bed' (rabbit)