Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to have sat on her feet

232 replies

Toenailz · 11/09/2023 23:39

Tongue in cheek really, I feel perfectly reasonable. OH thinks I'm getting old, intolerant, and grumpy.

Got on the bus today with shopping bags in tow, they're heavy and I'm knackered (I have a disability that causes chronic exhaustion, but it's invisible). It's heaving busy in town/on bus, so I head to the back of the bus so we can fit some bags on our lap/feet out of people's way/the aisle.

One corner of the back seats is taken. The other corner has one, older teenage girl, taking up 4 seats with herself taking one seat, her handbag taking another, and her feet on the 2 seats in front of her, burying her head in her phone as if she can't see us. Didn't move her handbag or feet from the two seats, despite my obviously being right in front of her, so I just gave up and sat on her feet.

She removed them sharpish, probably because I'm quite fat.

Probably not helped by the inward trip earlier today, where having dodged one teenager's leg placed right into the aisle, I tripped over the next one's leg in aisle and went flying.

I couldn't be arsed asking her to move, because I was about 6 inches in front of her, my OH had sat in the seat next to her handbag, so there's no way she couldn't have known we were there (no headphones, either) so I thought, if you're going to pretend I'm not there, I'm going to pretend you're not. But ffs, I sat on a teenager. ON PURPOSE. Not a high point in my life.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Lifeomars · 12/09/2023 12:16

FunnysInLaJardin · 12/09/2023 10:33

well done @Toenailz , excellent work.

The teens on the bus who really irritate me are the ones who don't stand in the queue like everyone else, but sit waiting for the bus and then push to the front when the bus arrives.

I always want to say join the queue you cheeky sods, but cant be bothered with the mouth full of abuse, so don't. I just scowl at them instead

There are a load like that at the stop in town where I get my bus home from. They mill around like a cloud, some in the queue, some behind the bus shelter, some further down the road between the stop and another stop for a different route. The bus arrives and they all swarm en masse to the front of the queue, past mums with little ones, past older and slower people, and on they get. I like to think that they will change when they are older

FTB2023 · 12/09/2023 12:16

She took the space she was entitled to take.
Not one person on this thread doesn't think she wasn't entitled to sit on that seat.
Some of us don't think that gives her the right to put her arse on someone else's person when simply speaking to her would have achieved the same outcome.

Justaredherring · 12/09/2023 12:17

swimlyn · 12/09/2023 01:08

…so I thought, if you're going to pretend I'm not there, I'm going to pretend you're not. But ffs, I sat on a teenager. ON PURPOSE. Not a high point in my life…

Brilliant! 😃

Perfectly acceptable.

I was wondering how long it would be for the ‘hidden disability’ claim to be trotted out.

Not sure if I’ve ever related the story here, but I used to commute regularly by train, and my station to go home was 15mins or so out of Waterloo, so the train arrived about 80% full. It typically had a double seat and a triple seat across the carriage, so when you got on there’d be one person on the double and two on the triple. Strangely, none of these people could possibly conceive that you’d like to sit down too.

One day I’d had enough of these blinkered twats, and put my bag on the rack above a triple. The two men had left about a twelve-inch gap between them. They were NOT going to cooperate, so I just sat on them. Neither of them would budge an inch, so there’s this ridiculous scenario of me perched ON their legs.

A mile or so out of that station there was a junction for another line to head off somewhere, and when the trains hit the multiple sets of points there was a lot of rocking and clattering of the wheels. As the train rocked, gravity began to take effect. I slowly but surely sank down into position on the seat. Still they maintained their pressure towards each other. As always with commuters this all had to take place in complete silence. 😅

I huffed a little, wriggled a little and glanced both ways just to annoy them. Packed so tight, any movement affected them but they were determined not to give way. Silly sods.

Two or three stations later I’d gained enough space to relax a little. And snigger…

omg properly made me lol 😂

LuckySantangelo35 · 12/09/2023 12:19

NO-ONE should have their feet’s on the seats.

end of.

it’s inconsiderate and dirty.

YANBU OP

Cant see how anyone could argue otherwise

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 12/09/2023 12:21

Webmeister999 · 11/09/2023 23:57

I dont use public transport any more (mobility issues) but I have never been backward in moving people and their belongings out of the way. I will use my "teacher" voice to say something like "Move your bags please. Thank you" and then proceed to plonk myself and my pretty big arse where I want to plonk it. I have picked up peoples belongings when they were occupying a seat and placed them on the persons lap or the table on trains. No one has ever challenged me although I had had a bit of huffing and puffing.

Would you not consider asking politely instead of telling people to move? People aren't perfect, sometimes they are preoccupied and are just not thinking. If they refuse to move, then that's the time to get rude (which I would do).

LuckySantangelo35 · 12/09/2023 12:26

@SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs

nope, having your feet on seats is rude and inexcusable. People shouldn’t do it, end of .

Anonymouslyposting · 12/09/2023 12:26

Obviously YABU not to ask her to move her feet - it’s just polite and you never know, she may have had a broken toe or something that you sitting on could have really hurt.

But she was being unreasonable not to move without being asked (or indeed to have her feet up on the seats in the first place) so she can’t get too grumpy about squished feet!

CherryMaDeara · 12/09/2023 12:27

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 12/09/2023 12:21

Would you not consider asking politely instead of telling people to move? People aren't perfect, sometimes they are preoccupied and are just not thinking. If they refuse to move, then that's the time to get rude (which I would do).

Show quote history

I think if people place bags on seats they need to be hyper aware and ready to move the bag as soon as it’s looks like someone wants it.

I have no issues with asking people to move their bag but I also wouldn’t be upset if someone gave me my bag instead of asking me to move it.

Epidote · 12/09/2023 12:30

OP, you have made my day.
YANBU.

whynotwhatknot · 12/09/2023 12:30

my dh sits on poeoples bags on a commuter train-hes asked so many people to move them hes bored of it-they usually just huff-its rude feet are worse though

Mistressanne · 12/09/2023 12:32

Checkcurtains · 12/09/2023 10:39

She was rude but you assaulted her so you really can't take the moral high ground here OP

How hard is it to ask someone to move? Seriously

Don’t be ridiculous.
she shouldn’t have her feet on the seat in the first place.
For all she knew the op could have been partially sighted and not seen her feet.

Lentilweaver · 12/09/2023 12:32

Having feet on seats is disgusting. I can't be too fussed about what you did.

I am on the Tube right now and I want to knee the man spreader next to me.

Checkcurtains · 12/09/2023 12:38

Mistressanne · 12/09/2023 12:32

Don’t be ridiculous.
she shouldn’t have her feet on the seat in the first place.
For all she knew the op could have been partially sighted and not seen her feet.

Show quote history

I agree she shouldn't have had her feet on the seat.

Still doesn't give her the right to assault her.

Just like if someone is standing in my way I don't just punch them in the face, I use my polite words and simply ask them to move.

What is the world coming to when physically harming someone is excused by the tiniest inconvenience?

Lentilweaver · 12/09/2023 12:42

I don't think sitting on her feet is equal to assaulting her.

dexterslockedintheshedagain · 12/09/2023 12:46

NooNakedJacuzziness · 12/09/2023 12:05

Katy Perry's follow up maybe:
I sat on a teenager on purpose
She was taking up seats that were surplus

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Itwasntmeguv · 12/09/2023 13:01

Lentilweaver · 12/09/2023 12:42

I don't think sitting on her feet is equal to assaulting her.

I'd love to see the desk sergeant's face when a teenager wanders into a police station to report "I'm here to report an assault. I accidentally left my feet on the seat in front of me on the bus, and someone sat on them"

housethatbuiltme · 12/09/2023 13:02

Just to play devil advocate but everyone saying she had her dirty feed up on the seats.

The busses here a designed to put your feed up, the cushion pops up to make a foot rest and they literally have signs saying to 'relax and put your feet up'.

AIBU to have sat on her feet
Itisyourturntowashthebath · 12/09/2023 13:05

Itwasntmeguv · 12/09/2023 13:01

I'd love to see the desk sergeant's face when a teenager wanders into a police station to report "I'm here to report an assault. I accidentally left my feet on the seat in front of me on the bus, and someone sat on them"

Show quote history

"That will be £50"

Zebedee999 · 12/09/2023 13:06

Putting feet on seats anywhere, but especially public transport shows very poor manners and upbringing. Glad the OP sat on this teens feet.

Ellie56 · 12/09/2023 13:06

Grin Grin

You are great OP. You remind me of my dear departed friend. She used to tell people in no uncertain terms that seats were for "bums, not bags." ! Grin

Still laughing at you sitting on entitled teenager's feet!😂😂

Jeffreybubblesbombom · 12/09/2023 13:09

When l want to sit down and people have bags on a seat.. being a bus/ train/ airport etc. I usually say... oh it's nice to see your bag has got a seat and enjoying a sit down..
I even have my walking stick.. but people couldn't care less these days

Sayitaintso33 · 12/09/2023 13:11

If you are taking up more than one seat on public transport you should be ready to accommodate those in need of a seat. If you are pretending not to notice others you can't complain too loudly that they don't notice your feet or your bag.

So although you technically assaulted the girl, she was far more unreasonable than you and is another example of why victim blaming isn't always wrong.

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 12/09/2023 13:19

CherryMaDeara · 12/09/2023 12:27

I think if people place bags on seats they need to be hyper aware and ready to move the bag as soon as it’s looks like someone wants it.

I have no issues with asking people to move their bag but I also wouldn’t be upset if someone gave me my bag instead of asking me to move it.

Show quote history

I agree, ideally people should be aware. But we're all human and we aren't all hyper aware all of the time, despite our best intentions I like to think I'm considerate, hold doors open for people, thank people when they do the same for me, give up a seat on public transport to the elderly/disabled. However I'm sure there has been the odd occasion when I've missed those opportunities, due to being distracted. I'm human, as we all are.

All it takes is a "can I sit there please?" and their response will tell you if they're someone who just wasn't paying full attention or if they're a rude ratbag who deserves to be met with the same rudeness that they're showing other people.

DahliaMacNamara · 12/09/2023 13:21

I think it's an idea to ask first, if only to avoid getting footmarks on the back of your clothes. But I do get fucked off about being expected to be polite to people who are being deliberately rude, selfish and obstructive. Yes, I would (and have) disturb a pretend-sleeping man taking up three seats for his arse, his bags and his feet. I can't summon up the will to be charming about this kind of crap any more. The best I can manage is a pissed-off expression and a functional please.

Cheeseandlobster · 12/09/2023 13:25

JetBlackSteed · 11/09/2023 23:47

I would be interested to know who was sat in the other corner of the back seats that you chose to leave be and pick on the teenage girl?

The selfish teenage girl hogging 4 seats 🙄