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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Woken in hotel room

262 replies

Dyinforaliein · 09/09/2023 12:01

Recently I went to stay in a hotel with two friends. We went to a show and stayed together in the room. My friends shared the double and had the single.

I haven't had a lie in in so long. I was looking forward to letting my hair down and waking up naturally because I have been burnt out lately.

After the show we went out for drinks and were back pretty late, about 3 or 4. I could not believe my ears when I was woken up at 9am. She was sitting up in the bed talking to her husband on the phone. It wasn't even a whisper, just a low volume. My other friend started stirring too, and that was it. We were all up. We had looked forward to this Weekend for ages so I decided to let it go.

If it was me and I wanted to ring my husband to check on the kids (I wouldn't, I would just text), I would have gone into the hallway outside the hotel room. I just don't get why she couldn't have walked a few metres to avoid risking waking us up.She was just sitting there on the bed talking on the phone!

I was so looking forward to having a night out with a nice uninterrupted sleep the next day and I can't stop thinking about it!

Would this have annoyed you?

OP posts:
TheGirlFromTomorrow · 09/09/2023 15:18

Yes, it would have really annoyed me. You don't make noise when others are sleeping, especially if you know they've only been asleep for a few hours.

There are plenty of other places in a hotel to go, if you want to make noise. Why not go down to breakfast and have a long conversation there? Or lie in bed and text if you're that desperate to talk to someone!

LizardLizard · 09/09/2023 15:18

9am wouldn’t have bothered me - you get kicked out in some places at 10:30am. I thought you were going to say they were up at 6:30am.

I think if you wanted a lie in you should probably have said in advance and got a separate room if that wasn’t on the agenda.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 09/09/2023 15:25

YANBU

I'd have been LIVID. The time is bloody irrelevant. There were TWO people ASLEEP and she is so bloody rude to talk on her phone waking them up? No way. I'd have made it very unclear to her that that wasn't on.

Unfair to suggest she should have done it in the corridor! If I'd been a guest being woken up by someone on the phone in the corridor, I'd have been pissed off. She should have went down to the public areas, such as reception. Or just text like a normal person who has two sleeping people in the same room.

I'd have to at some point mention it to her. Her behaviour was unacceptable.

As for the MNers banging on about 9am being a lie in - wise the fuck up, she only went to sleep at 3-4am, that is not even a full night's sleep, so how on earth is it a lie in? Crazy people on here.

Cucucucu · 09/09/2023 15:25

Books separate room ? 9 is late

readingmakesmehappy · 09/09/2023 15:28

OP I'm with you. Also usually woken up by kids before 7am, would also see any night away as a chance to sleep in until waking naturally. I think in those circumstances early wakers in a shared room should mess about on their phones for a bit or very quietly get up and go out so as not to disturb those still sleeping.

Hawkins0009 · 09/09/2023 15:28

reguardless of the time, if people are sleeping then you do a james bond, sneak out and have a private conversation.

Riverlee · 09/09/2023 15:29

ActDottie · 09/09/2023 12:11

At 9am she wasnt being unreasonable. 6am you may have a point.

This

Lampshadeblue · 09/09/2023 15:29

I actually think she was a bit rude. If someone is asleep around me (even if it’s an afternoon nap or whatever) I would try to be quiet around them if possible, so as not to wake them. That’s just basic manners.

Mercurial123 · 09/09/2023 15:30

As for the MNers banging on about 9am being a lie in - wise the fuck up, she only went to sleep at 3-4am, that is not even a full night's sleep, so how on earth is it a lie in? Crazy people on here.

You seem more upset than the OP.

Notonthestairs · 09/09/2023 15:31

They went to bed at 4!

5 hours sleep isn't a lie in!

They weren't checking out!

2 people were still asleep!

FettleOfKish · 09/09/2023 15:31

Hawkins0009 · 09/09/2023 15:28

reguardless of the time, if people are sleeping then you do a james bond, sneak out and have a private conversation.

I don't know who is sleeping in hotel rooms without snapping immediately awake at the sound of the room door opening, but it ain't me!

Original poster
Dyinforaliein · 09/09/2023 15:34

The thing is, I assumed that as we didn't have to check out the next day, I could let my hair down and have a late night. We weren't rowdy coming in either: one of us doesn't even drink. We were just having fun catching up and came back to the hotel and straight to sleep, pretty much. We weren't singing down the corridor or continuing the party in the hotel room. But it was a late one and I had expected for all of us to sleep a bit longer as a result. We weren't all in bed at 10pm and had an 11 hour sleep.

Anyway, I think it was unreasonable of me to expect other people I don't usually share a room with to keep the hours I expect. Lesson absolutely learned!

OP posts:
SunflowersAndSmellyTrainers · 09/09/2023 15:42

YANBU. It was inconsiderate of your friend, particularly bearing in mind what time you all turned in to bed for sleep. So I agree with you here. She should have taken her call elsewhere or waited until a more reasonable time or silently texted imo.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 09/09/2023 15:43

That would really really annoy me. 9 am is very early for adults after a night out, when there are no kids about.

10/11 would be more suitable

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 09/09/2023 15:44

I’ve had this situation on holiday and been the one who had been woken earlier than preferred by an outside noise, and then had kids wanting to speak. Damn right I went out into communal space (not outside other people’s bedrooms though!) and spoke to my kids so as not to wake my friend.

We were in US and kids at home in UK with ex so when it was out 9/10 am ish they were well on the way through their day.

Crinkle77 · 09/09/2023 15:45

YANBU OP. It's perfectly acceptable for them get up and dressed what ever but not to have a loud telephone conversation when others are asleep.

TheGirlFromTomorrow · 09/09/2023 15:46

The only thing I would say is that it might have been mitigated by wearing earplugs and an eye mask, which I would do if I was sharing a room.

The logic of calling 9am a lie in regardless of what time you get to bed is baffling though. If you'd gone to bed at 10pm, it would be like waking people up at 3am. No one would consider that acceptable but because it's 9am the exact same amount of sleep magically becomes a lie in?

By that logic, if I'm a night shift worker and I get to bed at 8am, I can get up at 9am and say wow what a lovely long sleep - and a lie in to boot!

PlipPlopChoo · 09/09/2023 15:53

9am is not early. Non issue

Isitautumnyet23 · 09/09/2023 15:53

TheGirlFromTomorrow · 09/09/2023 15:46

The only thing I would say is that it might have been mitigated by wearing earplugs and an eye mask, which I would do if I was sharing a room.

The logic of calling 9am a lie in regardless of what time you get to bed is baffling though. If you'd gone to bed at 10pm, it would be like waking people up at 3am. No one would consider that acceptable but because it's 9am the exact same amount of sleep magically becomes a lie in?

By that logic, if I'm a night shift worker and I get to bed at 8am, I can get up at 9am and say wow what a lovely long sleep - and a lie in to boot!

I suppose it depends what was planned the next day. If I go away for a night, I can handle one late night and still get up early as wouldn’t want to miss the next day (or a hotel breakfast!). If they only planned to sleep and go home, then I do think the friend could have spoken to her husband elsewhere.

lucya66 · 09/09/2023 15:54

It’s rude to talk on the phone when others are sleeping, but 9am is a late wake up and yabu to expect a lie in when sharing a hotel room with two friends. Get your own room and be clear about your lie in/ what time you expect to be up and about.

Id be dissapointed if a friend ruined our day lying in being lazy instead of getting up and at em without prior agreement.

Berlinlover · 09/09/2023 15:56

I would have booked a room on my own, I do think your friend was inconsiderate though.

JaukiVexnoydi · 09/09/2023 15:57

In a shared room you need to have a conversation about the morning policy before you even check in, so that anyone whose view is incompatible can book a separate room.

Maybe she'd been awake alone since 7:45 and was bored and hungry and grumpy about layabouts not waking up (not my pov but I know people who would think this way)

OhHelloTheres · 09/09/2023 15:58

Reminds me a bit of my sister who woke me up in the middle of the night before my wedding so she could borrow my phone to talk to her husband 😂 She was away from him ONE night so had seen him like 4 hours earlier. Absolute insanity. She didn't understand why it pissed me off so much. Some people are just a lot less considerate than others

Sigmama · 09/09/2023 16:01

God she sounds really self centred and why the hell did she have to talk to dh first thing on a girls weekend away

Moveoverdarlin · 09/09/2023 16:01

I think it’s completely unrealistic to expect an uninterrupted lie-in when sharing a room with two other adults. Whether she was on the phone, got up for wee, alarm went off, coughed etc. I would need a wee by about 7am and wouldn’t go back to sleep.