Aibu for wanting to speak to HR regarding a smelly colleague?

[Pianoplayer190]

Long story short, I have a colleague who has worked with us for years but has an awful smell.

Unfortunately her body odour is overwhelming and makes me feel very nauseous. I’m very sensitive to bad smells and I get a waft of the bad smell because she’s placed herself directly next to me.

Shes morbidly obese. We have quite a few larger colleagues that work with us but they never have an odour. I’m just really struggling to get through my day without walking up to HR and saying there’s an issue.

Ive not said a word to other people as effectively that’s just me being vile then. But I need to share the issue because I’m struggling to get through my day. I can’t move office space or desk.

The smell is like faecal matter, a period pad left in the sun and a wet mop. That’s all I can say and I’m really and truly suffering. I heaved at lunch today while eating.

AIBU if I complain.

Well I’m sorry. Just call a spade a spade. If you’re morbidly obese your daily functioning is impaired. This person is actually just making the problem worse. I understand it’s not easy and for that I sympathise. But it’s hard to work with the smell. I like her just not her smell

Of course you need to raise this with HR. Do not say you’re sensitive or have a strong sense of smell or anything like that. The issue is with the person.

bananaxapple · Today 22:43

It doesn’t sound pleasant, I’ll give you that.

However, you are absolutely unreasonable for mentioning her weight, implying the issue might be because of that. You continue to ignore the commenters who have also pointed this out. If you’re showering twice each day and using strong deodorants (which sounds vastly excessive) are you sure you’re not trying to hide anything yourself?”

Obese people sweat more, obviously.

I shower in the morning and bath at night. I think it's pretty normal.

Perhaps she loves him 🙄

Just tell your manager it is an issue, without getting into details about her weight or theories of what it smells like. Just say it is a sensitive issue and your colleague has an overwhelming body odour daily and you need them to address it with her or move you.

Several people have commented on how much harder it is to wash properly when you are obese

Meanwhile Vicks up nose, air fresheners on desk? Being in classrooms, some teenagers honk, windows open barely a crack so have to use my own methods, including a little fan, olbas oil on tissue to regularly sniff!

We had a very nerdy accountant in our office, at month end we were all very busy, balancing etc. I swear he was too busy to go for a wee and dribbled, his fabric chair smelled horrendously. People from other offices would say it smells like an old folks home in here.

We went to HR who did nothing but tried to say we were picking on him.

Or a bar set very low 🙄

because 1) its likely to be the source of the problem and 2) because if the Op says anything it could be taken as fat shaming.

There was a man at my gym like this. It was fecal matter left in a sweaty and unwashed bum crack. Please do not ask me to tell you how I know this. 🤢

Oh man that's a tough one, working in close quarters with smells is the pits (pun intended)

I didn't quite get in the posts, is it because its v hot at the mo its really kicked up a gear or all the time?

I have seen the group approach work a few times as in a general chat with everyone in the office? I imagine she absolutely cannot smell it would have been addressed and also if its a combo I would assume general hygiene issues all round. We all whiff from time to time but persistent uncleanness is unfair to colleagues. If someone was continuing to make another colleagues working day untenable for any other reason something would be done. Get chatting to your manager asap

The pious posters faux naively querying the relevance of weight need to give over. It's harder to reach to wash and harder to wash within skin folds when severely obese. It also means they generate more heat and sweat more.

Now off you trot on your high horses which probably fart the smell of roses.

Curious as to how you know this?

No. I work in HR and we’ve had a couple of complaints about colleagues body odours. We ask the manager to have a polite word with the ‘offender’ and take it from there. It’s not a nice situation for anyone involved but it can be gone about with in a sensitive way.

Shower and a bath every day seems like an awful lot of water to use. Not sure I could afford it!

Sorry to hijack OPs thread but you scrub your feet in the shower? Do most people do this?? 😬

I agree that their weight is relevant. If they're morbidly obese it's more likely that sweat and bacteria will develop in the folds. If the person isn't then washing properly it can become very unpleasant smelling.

If your feet are sweaty/dirty, how else would you clean them?

Buy her a body spray and an feminax spray or personal wipes and a few strong deodorants. Leave it for her anonymously.
Perhaps a book on personal hygiene too.
I have little sense of smell and rely on the family to say if I have a problem. She may be the same but no one is telling her.

@Hibiscrubbed was it during spin? There used to be a guy that did spinning morn and eve at my gym. Wore his kit 1st thing, threw it in a locker and then wore it again at night. Smelled like actual death

I don’t think the OP is unreasonable. Others have mentioned obese people find washing difficult or have infections etc where folds of skin are.

Showering twice a day isn’t excessive. I have horses and work outside a lot so I shower twice a day, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with people choosing to ensure they’re clean.

It doesn’t matter if people sweat more, that’s more reason to shower to ensure they don’t smell.

Dotcheck

Several people have commented on how much harder it is to wash properly when you are obese”

My husband is obese. He manages to wash properly perfectly well.

You can't be serious?

So the poor woman is going to be wondering which one of her colleagues did this and viewing everyone with suspicion?

Plus it could be seen as malicious.