Page 20 | Reborn dolls in the pram bay

gezelligheid · 2023-08-31T06:34:39+00:00

A couple of times now I've been unable to get on the bus with my baby in a pram because there are two local women who take their reborn dolls out in prams and take up the pram bays. I know they are reborn dolls as I've seen the dolls in their pram. I understand people have reborn dolls for many different reasons but to take up a space meaning a real baby can't get on the bus surely isn't fair? I've complained to the bus service and they've said they cannot monitor whether babies are real or not so if they get on the bus first I should ask them to put their pram down upon boarding. I'm worried this will cause an altercation on the bus so I'm wondering AIBU to say something on the bus even though it may be embarrassing for the women?

Paq · 01/09/2023 11:00

The pram area is for babies. Not for therapy aids. Babies take precedence in this area in the same way that wheelchairs take precedence over babies in the wheelchair area.

The bus company is being spineless.

HairsprayBabe · 01/09/2023 11:01

@sunglassesonthetable yep I agree, it is the impact on others that is the problem

sunglassesonthetable · 01/09/2023 11:03

Someone mentioned a doll user on their local bus whose companion will fold up the pram if space is needed.

That's what the way it should be.

But personally don't care that this person is using dolls.

HairsprayBabe · 01/09/2023 11:04

@gezelligheid I would be happy to send an email complaining to the bus company about this for you too, maybe if they get a bunch of complaints they will actually do something. They did in our area so it isn't unheard of.

girlswillbegirls · 01/09/2023 11:11

I think the answer to this is for the bus company to leave a sign at the bay area saying:

"Only prams and babys are to be placed in this area. Owners of reborns need to collapse the pram and not occupy this area. Thanks"

I might sound a bit weird but I think this js the most respectful and fair solution to everyone, from real baby's, women with this issues and also the poor drivers that shouldn't have to deal with this in one to one basis.

cheeseandcrackers89 · 01/09/2023 11:15

Errr...I may sound really stupid but what is a reborn doll? Is it common for adults to go out with dolls? I do not think I have ever seen this where I live. Sorry if I sound silly by asking this...

Paq · 01/09/2023 11:19

cheeseandcrackers89 · 01/09/2023 11:15

Errr...I may sound really stupid but what is a reborn doll? Is it common for adults to go out with dolls? I do not think I have ever seen this where I live. Sorry if I sound silly by asking this...

They are very realistic allegedly baby dolls. There's a whole cult of pretending that they are real: www.reborndollsshop.com/collections/bestsellers?gad=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwl8anBhCFARIsAKbbpySWS8Enu36EI-AMtX1U0pp5FqlIGgti0MvHhEh8Kra2BaXjIEKUyEkaAt-2EALw_wcB

sashh · 01/09/2023 11:19

MillicentTrilbyHiggins · 31/08/2023 08:40

My DS used to love taking his baby (child's toy not reborn) out in the toy pram. Including on the bus and using the wheelchair/pram space.
However he was well aware that the moment a wheelchair/real babu needed to get on he had to fold the pram and hold the 'baby'. Luckily for him baby's Grandma was always on hand to help.

That sounds adorable.

Superfood · 01/09/2023 11:23

cheeseandcrackers89 · 01/09/2023 11:15

Errr...I may sound really stupid but what is a reborn doll? Is it common for adults to go out with dolls? I do not think I have ever seen this where I live. Sorry if I sound silly by asking this...

Check out r/Reborndollcringe on Reddit.

cheeseandcrackers89 · 01/09/2023 11:25

Paq · 01/09/2023 11:19

They are very realistic allegedly baby dolls. There's a whole cult of pretending that they are real: www.reborndollsshop.com/collections/bestsellers?gad=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjwl8anBhCFARIsAKbbpySWS8Enu36EI-AMtX1U0pp5FqlIGgti0MvHhEh8Kra2BaXjIEKUyEkaAt-2EALw_wcB

Show quote history

Thank you!

cheeseandcrackers89 · 01/09/2023 11:26

Superfood · 01/09/2023 11:23

Check out r/Reborndollcringe on Reddit.

Show quote history

Thank you!

Insommmmnia · 01/09/2023 11:26

Milkymilkymama · 01/09/2023 08:28

Some of you need to understand these dolls are often used after miscarriage, infertility, baby loss and still birth. They help with depression and grief.

Yes, they should be folding theirs down as its safer than doing it with a baby in one arm that cannot stand or sit unaided. But dont you dare refer to them as idiots with their toys. As a mum yourself, can you imagine losing your child now?

Ask them to fold, but do not mention the doll. Just say you can't fold while holding yours for safety. You could say it will be safer for their little one than yours.

But if you think they deserve to be embarrassed you have no empathy at all. Just imagine going through pregnancy and birth and coming home without your baby. Imagine waking up one morning to find your 4 month old dead in their cot. Have some f compassion.

Edited

The empathy and compassion these women need is signposting and encouragement to proper therapy to help them move through their grief. The reborn babies don't help with depression and grief they encourage sitting in the grief and not moving beyond it.

Original poster

gezelligheid · 01/09/2023 11:33

inisisle · 01/09/2023 10:55

Followed up with another email to the bus company so hopefully they will send a more helpful response this time. I just think telling me to ask the DollLadies to move is a cop out because it makes me look like the bad guy and will be seen as causing problems on the bus, whereas if the bus driver did it the request bears more weight.

So you want the bus company to circulate a photo or description of the women among the drivers of that number bus asking them to check if the babies are real or to ask the women
if they're dolls? You're going to have to 'be the bad guy' either way and speak up and say 'I need this space' to the driver anyway. Otherwise they're not just going to ask the women to take the prams down even if they see the dolls.

How old roughly are the women? Apologies if you've said.

Show quote history

It's hard to say because they look quite rough like possibly addicts (sorry I don't know how to say that more nicely?) so could be younger than they appear. They look around 40.

I have no proof that they're addicts so that's not the point of the post. Either way they clearly have mental health issues of some sort that leads them to take a doll in a pram on the bus

OP posts:

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/09/2023 11:38

Insommmmnia · 01/09/2023 11:26

The empathy and compassion these women need is signposting and encouragement to proper therapy to help them move through their grief. The reborn babies don't help with depression and grief they encourage sitting in the grief and not moving beyond it.

Show quote history

Even if it is, the place to do this is not the lower deck of a number 57 bus by some random woman with a child dropkicking their comfort item whilst bellowing 'It's a fucking dolly - get the fuck out of my space and get your dead baby issues seen to, you fucking nutter.' or other such phrases that the people claiming they'd use would have the whole bus applauding them afterwards.

Insommmmnia · 01/09/2023 11:41

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/09/2023 11:38

Even if it is, the place to do this is not the lower deck of a number 57 bus by some random woman with a child dropkicking their comfort item whilst bellowing 'It's a fucking dolly - get the fuck out of my space and get your dead baby issues seen to, you fucking nutter.' or other such phrases that the people claiming they'd use would have the whole bus applauding them afterwards.

Show quote history

Well of course not no, I wasn't suggesting that

And I'm not sure how your comment even fits in with what I am saying tbh anyway

I was hardly suggesting drop kicking the doll by pointing out that posters saying that the dolls help with depression and grief are incorrect and that this is not the best way to process that grief ie. by not processing it at all

I'm not sure how this was supposed to mean I was suggesting violence and swearing as an alternative

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/09/2023 11:43

Insommmmnia · 01/09/2023 11:41

Well of course not no, I wasn't suggesting that

And I'm not sure how your comment even fits in with what I am saying tbh anyway

I was hardly suggesting drop kicking the doll by pointing out that posters saying that the dolls help with depression and grief are incorrect and that this is not the best way to process that grief ie. by not processing it at all

I'm not sure how this was supposed to mean I was suggesting violence and swearing as an alternative

Show quote history

I didn't mean you specifically - there are a significant number of posters saying they'd do exactly that sort of thing on this thread.

Insommmmnia · 01/09/2023 11:46

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/09/2023 11:43

I didn't mean you specifically - there are a significant number of posters saying they'd do exactly that sort of thing on this thread.

Show quote history

Given I've already talked about my still born baby and the lack of therapy available afterwards and explained how unhelpful these dolls can be I found you replying to my comment as if I had suggested that particularly distasteful tbh

If you didn't mean me specifically I'm unsure as to why you replied to me as if I was one of those posters

sunglassesonthetable · 01/09/2023 11:46

The bus company need to get their arses in gear.

What if was your basic drunk refusing to move a trolley or something?
I think they've skirted the issue because it's " "women with prams".

NeverDropYourMooncup · 01/09/2023 11:57

Insommmmnia · 01/09/2023 11:46

Given I've already talked about my still born baby and the lack of therapy available afterwards and explained how unhelpful these dolls can be I found you replying to my comment as if I had suggested that particularly distasteful tbh

If you didn't mean me specifically I'm unsure as to why you replied to me as if I was one of those posters

Show quote history

Because yours was the newest post on the thread, nothing more significant than that.

FatherJackHackettsUnderpantsHamper · 01/09/2023 13:01

"Only prams and babys are to be placed in this area. Owners of reborns need to collapse the pram and not occupy this area. Thanks"

You know how that will play out, though. For many people who 'identify' into something, their reality is THE reality; so other people might have dolls, but theirs is their actual baby.

Hufflepods · 01/09/2023 13:02

sunglassesonthetable · 01/09/2023 11:46

The bus company need to get their arses in gear.

What if was your basic drunk refusing to move a trolley or something?
I think they've skirted the issue because it's " "women with prams".

I have a feeling men with dolls in prams wouldn’t be afforded the same mollycoddling!

sunglassesonthetable · 01/09/2023 13:06

They're hiding behind "woman with prams" in their response.

It should be the basic "what we do when people are obstructing the pram area"". Same as luggage.

EekGoesTheBaby · 01/09/2023 14:09

Eachpeachpears · 31/08/2023 09:49

@EekGoesTheBaby you have no idea how much your lovely comment has bought me joy this morning. Thank you

Aw, glad to hear that. I meant it. :)

inisisle · 01/09/2023 14:18

It's hard to say because they look quite rough like possibly addicts (sorry I don't know how to say that more nicely?) so could be younger than they appear. They look around 40.

I have no proof that they're addicts so that's not the point of the post. Either way they clearly have mental health issues of some sort that leads them to take a doll in a pram on the bus

That makes complete sense as to why you don't want them to know that you're the reason behind them being asked to move.

I hope you get a satisfactory response from the bus company.

Angrycat2768 · 01/09/2023 14:49

I ender, if they are addicts if they have had babies removed from them at birth? Again, complete conjecture and they still need treatment for the trauma of having a child removed, as well as their addiction issues.