Would you prefer private school?

[Dontbeamenace]

I'm sure I would prefer private school for my children. Would it matter to you if money was no cost?

I think the money is worth it.
Shame to say I agree with you. I can hear my mother in my ear saying it’s the peers you make for life.
Plus, there are a lot more opportunities.

We were going to send ds but he got accepted to a state school where a lot of locals would give a arm or leg for it. I'm not sure how it's going to be but ds also got accepted to one of the hothouses and when I went to view it, it reeked of toxicity. None of the boys looked happy and one thing that put me off that it openly said that they don't accommodate pupils with Sen. I later found out that they also slowly manage out students that have any difficulties or that are behind. Students in reception start getting tutored. If everything goes downhill, I will go private but not to one of those hothouses. I'll see how things go overtime in state but the local state school all the children look happy and bright but we'll see.

Yes, I and siblings went from age 4 - 18 and my children and their cousins on my side of the family did (and my grandchildren who are old enough to go to school).

No on principle as they are elitist and because you cannot buy a good education.

It would depend on the individual school and how it compared to the other options for my children.

I'd want to offer my children the best (as in most appropriate for them, their talents and personalities) education I could if money were no object. What sort of school that would be in would be irrelevant.

I think it depends on your circumstances but this moral outrage and vile comments and assumptions of kids from private schools is vastly inflated. I was very anti private - brother and sister both went and I did not, I had a chip on my shoulder about that for many years and vowed to not send me DCs on principle.

At the end of the day - we are all successful in our different fields, all have good jobs, all done well.

Roll on 15 yrs, my eldest dying in school, predictions of 3s in GCSES if they ever got there, no interest in anything. After the advicce from a teacher at school - ( absolutely love that teacher) we sent privately to the school suggested.

I have a v happy, thriving child, plays sport at v high level, just got GCSE results last week - nothing lower than a 6 across 8 subjects. How you transform a 3 in English to two 8s is beyond me but not complaining.

Fortunate enough to be able to afford it and have absolutely no regrets. The mix in the school is wide - children of self made millionaires, single parents, 100% assisted places - parents jobs range from self employed builder, teacher doctors, nurses, entrepreneurs, carers etc.

Other DC is thriving in a selective state grammar school and am sad to say we experience more snobbery and condescension there from the parents than at the private school. The bullying competitiveness and drugs are out of control.

Would now say the eldest has a wider view of life as some of the year did fail and struggled with exams and now gets not everyone can do exams., not sure the Grammar school child will get that experience. Far more a spirit of helping each other at the private school- boy from the Sixth From - sat DC down of his own volition and went over algebra, another did Geography etc. Younger DC has noted that would never happen as it is a dog eat dog word to get the 9 grade and no one helps those less able.

So someone who has come full circle, would not criticise anyones choice but accept that people can change their view as they battle for the best for their child.

Ultimately a system where money does and can buy education (sorry @Thementalloadisreal) is always a system which disadvantages the poor merely for being poor. And such a system is by definition not meritocratic, and a system based on inheritance alone cannot support an economy based on ability, knowledge and work, as we have seen before. Such simplicities and empiricisms seem to be forgotten nowadays. It is quite well known that girls get better education in single sex schools though - ‘mean girls’ are simply not the same level of threat to other girls that boys are.

No. I'm happy with the local state primary and secondary schools which have both moved from "requires improvement" to "good" since my dc started there.

Yes, when we had a significant windfall it was one of the first things we wanted to spend on. State schools around here are good, but under pressure and for us the cost was not an issue, so it made sense to be able to have a better experience.

Our dc are at a lovely nurturing prep which prepares for selective private school exams. Very small classes and great sport and extracurriculars. Less stress overall than a diverse state primary, as none of the families are struggling with COL etc.

State grammars are good but not that local to us and we don't really want to live in the areas where they are (or have a long journey to them). And they are still lacking with some opportunities like sports and extracurriculars and trips, compared to the good independent schools. When the finances aren't an issue it just makes more sense to go private and have those nice things.

No. Our catchment schools are all excellent (sadly the house prices reflect this).

The teaching is no better and often much poorer, unless it us a sen school the sen provision in private is often shocking. I def know teachers who we wouldn't hire at my good state who now teach in private. If the state school is not a sink school they'll prob do fine, with tutoring if needed in core subjects etc.

This. Our local schools are excellent. But Appreciate this is def not the case for many others, or kids who don’t get 1st choice or have long commute in school they do get.

I think a lot of people prefer to use state schools - especially if SEND is an issue as these are generally better supported in the state system (outside of specialist schools) - and then top up using their spare funds for extra curricular activities. Other than specialists schools - SEND, music, sport, drama, dance - I can't see the need for private education.

So much depends on the state school option. When our DC were young, we put our efforts into living somewhere with decent schools. Peer group influence is a big factor, and neither DH or I had good educational experiences, hence wanting better for our children.

We were significantly worse off than many of the families in the area, but believed the aspirational aspect was good for the DC, who have achieved well in their careers. Subsequently, the grandchildren’s schools have been excellent, no need for private schools. Affordability of where one lives is of course a huge factor.

Maybe you just don't understand schools and ofsted? Outstanding schools often means good at paperwork and getting rid of problem families. RI leads to good funding and support. And a focus on improving. O leads to complacency and a hothouse atmosphere.

The problem is people will move to where the good schools are, increasing demand and house prices with it. There is very little you can do to change this other than to live in a communist state.

The teaching is no better and often much poorer

Boomboom then why object to private schools if the teaching is better at state schools? If someone wants to spend their money on something they could get better for free then that’s up to them.

What’s funny is that in one breath you have people saying it makes no difference, ‘I went to state and now I’m the prime minister’ etc etc then you get others saying oh gosh no I wouldn’t want my dc to be unfairly privileged and have chances others don’t have in life. So which is it?!

Well it obviously depends on the school and the individual, so that's hardly surprising! The same school could be the absolute making of one kid and another might hate it. Equally the same kid could go to one private school and thrive and get absolutely loads out of it, but would hate another private school. Schools are all different and kids are all different, so it's hard to generalise.

Probably yes. Current plan is to wait and see if DD is bright and up to the 11+. If so I’m hoping she will get into a grammar, if not I’ll consider private based on how our finances look at the time, but we should be able to afford it if we stay on the current trajectory. Same plan for DS.

Both dh and I are teachers. Dh teaches secondary, I teach primary. We have both worked in state and private.

Both our children are in state secondaries. We could just about afford private but choose not to.