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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to tell DH he can't keep eating that

172 replies

oliversma · 30/08/2023 08:20

Every day after work DH buys a share bag of some kind of chocolate, twirl bites, buttons, whatever and eats the whole bag. AIBU to think it is too much to have daily? This isn't me caring about weight gain, this is me caring that it's unhealthy.

OP posts:
AllProperTeaIsTheft · 30/08/2023 09:17

I'd say something because those bags are pricey!

The OP didn't mention money was an issue, so I'm not sure why you'd assume that a packet of chocolates would be any more of a financial concern than anything else they might eat on a regular basis.

MasterBeth · 30/08/2023 09:18

lemonyaid · 30/08/2023 09:12

I'd say something because those bags are pricey!

No, they're not! You can always pick up some kind of sharing bag on offer at most supermarkets for £1.50. They are a much more cost-effective way of buying chocolate than a bar.

GOODCAT · 30/08/2023 09:19

It is unhealthy and a waste of money. I would comment along the lines of saying you are concerned for his health, but clearly not tell. You could try watching some programs together about healthy eating. Ultimately it is up to him, but I would be worried too.

andrainwillmaketheflowersgrow · 30/08/2023 09:20

lemonyaid · 30/08/2023 09:12

I'd say something because those bags are pricey!

They're only £1, hardly breaking the bank!

TeenyTinyMadness · 30/08/2023 09:20

agreed, although I can be tempted occasionally by a cheeky sniff

A whole sniff? Greedy. This is what’s wrong with us, we’ve lost sight of normal portion sizes and it’s no wonder we have an obesity crisis. One half of a sniff on leap years is plenty. Sort yourself out.

Scaredycatttt · 30/08/2023 09:20

I'd definitely say something. I wouldn't tell him to stop but I would point out that he's eating way too much sugar because I care about his health. My dp vapes and I regularly appeal to him to quit because it worries me.

Watchkeys · 30/08/2023 09:20

Does he not know that it's unhealthy, @oliversma ?

UndercoverCop · 30/08/2023 09:21

@TeenyTinyMadness you're absolutely right, I've completely lost control

MarshyMcMarshFace · 30/08/2023 09:24

Well, a bag of Twirl Bites (109g) is about 600 Cals and 100% of your recommended daily saturates limit.

So the fact is that it isn’t part of a healthy lifestyle to eat a whole bag per day.

You surely don’t have to be a competitive under eater to acknowledge that?

Not sure what you can do about it OP. IMO it is legit to care about the health of those e love and those our children love and friend on.

Why does he do it? Not enough filling lunch? Long wait for dinner? Habit? Comfort food?

Nagging won’t help.

Facts and your concern might make him click… if he is ready to make his own decision.

43ontherocksporfavor · 30/08/2023 09:24

‘Share bag’ tells you all you need to know.

IHateWasps · 30/08/2023 09:25

They're only £1, hardly breaking the bank!

£1? I wish they still were.

Liv999 · 30/08/2023 09:29

You can't dictate what he eats unless you'd be happy if he done the same to you, everyone has a bad habit, its not the end of the world

SadlyACupOfTeaDoesNotSolveEverything · 30/08/2023 09:30

SuperCallieFragilistic · 30/08/2023 08:42

But don't we all have various unhealthy habits?

I know plenty of people who are very disciplined when it comes to their eating, but rarely exercise, or they eat well and do plenty of exercise but they drink more than is good for them. Or don't manage their anger issues, or maybe don't manage their budget very well.

I exercise pretty well and am good at making regular doctor's appointments, but I definitely overeat salty snack foods, and I don't prioritise sleep enough.

My DH absolutely eats that much chocolate every day. He also goes to bed at a sensible time, doesn't drink, and manages his stress better than lots of other people.

We all have our stuff going on. It's difficult to rate one thing as more important than the others.

A very well balanced response.

I assume @oliversma (please let your husband be the one called Oliver for comedy value) means the 109g to 120g bags priced around £1.50? Calories of 500/600 count?

Every adult should know 3500/4000kcal a week in quickly munched chocolate isn’t great for them, but that’s a choice he makes.
Could you buy multipack chocolate bars with the weekly shop and he might just have one a night instead?

That said DH eats over double the calories I do in a day or he loses weight quickly. He tries to do this with healthy choices but not always!

thesnailandthewhale · 30/08/2023 09:31

The Cadbury chocolate button bag is 95g. A Mars bar is 50g., so in effect he's eating the equivalent of 2 chocolate bars a day. It's not healthy but there are much worse things he could be doing to his health - smoking, drinking etc

Inertia · 30/08/2023 09:35

SecretVictoria · 30/08/2023 08:32

Gets (large) popcorn and waits for competitive undereaters….

We’d share out one of those bags between my family of 26, and then we’d be far too full to even look at a chocolate for at least a week.

I don’t think there’s enough protein in those packs of chocolate- I would take them off him and give him some eggs and hummus instead . 🙂

WhenLifeGivesYouLimes · 30/08/2023 09:37

Yes a bag of nuts of equivalent calories would be better for him but he's an adult with capacity, everyone has one suboptimal habit and this is far from the worst.

If he's not gaining weight then you need to let it go. Even if you were worried about weight gain you'd need to tread carefully.

Gerrataere · 30/08/2023 09:37

Oooh greedy husband thread 🍿 (I promise I won’t eat the whole thing whilst scrolling).

Gerrataere · 30/08/2023 09:40

Inertia · 30/08/2023 09:35

We’d share out one of those bags between my family of 26, and then we’d be far too full to even look at a chocolate for at least a week.

I don’t think there’s enough protein in those packs of chocolate- I would take them off him and give him some eggs and hummus instead . 🙂

Show quote history

Bulk the popcorn out with lentils and you’ve a meal for a month 🤣.

Chocolate though, such a vile creation. I nibble a square of some overpriced brand on Christmas Day and I’m full for the year.

Elfandwellbeing · 30/08/2023 09:41

YABU and controlling. Leave him be.

Whatsmyusername1235 · 30/08/2023 09:41

Cazzovuoi · 30/08/2023 08:25

The posters who are telling you it’s fine if the person does XYZ are clearly carb addicts themselves and don’t want to admit it.

Its not normal, it sounds like carb addiction. You can tell him OP but he won’t do anything about it until he’s ready.

“he won’t do anything about it until he’s ready”

how dramatic 😂

gogomoto · 30/08/2023 09:43

It's no different than a mars bar (or similar) and packet of crisps that many eat daily. I have workmen in and they also all drink full sugar cone, sugar in tea etc - no not ideal dietary wise but hardly unusual. As long as weight is in check I think it's his business. However if he's moaning about weight gain/clothes not fitting then it's time for home truths

HateLongCovid · 30/08/2023 09:46

It's very unhealthy to drink lots of alcohol but plenty of people do that before, during and after meals. I'd rather he was tanked up on chocolate than beer 🍻

LightDrizzle · 30/08/2023 09:51

Wow! This is an eye-opener for me.

I’m glad my husband doesn’t police and snip at my food choices. He obviously credits me with the wit to know Walkers Cheese & Onion and chocolate aren’t healthy for me.

Unless the financial impact of his snacking affects your family then I’d stop mentioning it. Likewise if it started to have a direct impact on his health - he becomes pre-diabetic, I would raise it in that context.

He’s an autonomous adult indulging in something legal and cheap. Can you imagine a woman posting on here about her DH nagging her to take a walk or go to the gym EVERY day!

FunkyMonks · 30/08/2023 09:54

If he's active and healthy weight and eats healthy meals and fruit then I don't see anything wrong with it as such life is short I've known people who have been super healthy never smoked or drunk very active and drop dead.
So long as he's not washing it all down with pop
And takeaways I really don't see the issue.

CornishGem1975 · 30/08/2023 09:55

He can eat what he wants!

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