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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to insist bathroom window stays shut in winter

159 replies

turkeytwizzlerss · 14/08/2023 21:36

I've got a new lodger and she's been putting on the heating in her room (can control individual bedroom heating) but she will leave the bathroom window open all the time.

I don't think it's a bad thing to leave the bathroom window open, however it's a bit contradictory - she's always cold and the bathroom window needs to be open all year round. The shower doesn't have a door and it can be cold, so it's not the best in winter generally as despite an extractor fan it's best if the window is also opened (or at least after you've showered).

I hate confrontation but I can see her being "cold" in winter and using up lots of gas and as well as keeping the upstairs bathroom window open.

AIBU to expect it to be shut the majority of the day?

OP posts:
LolaSmiles · 15/08/2023 16:52

YellowDots
We're the same as you. Windows get opened in the morning, bathroom window is usually open and the door from the bathroom to the landing is kept closed.

I sometimes suspect a lot of the sales of air freshener sprays are driven by people who hardly ventilate their houses and then liberally fill the air with stuff to make it smell 'nice'.

UghStopSnoring it's not kept open when people are using the bathroom. It's apparently got to be kept open at all other times because there's a radiator in the bathroom and OP wants the heat to trickle down to her bedroom that has broken heating, and it also has to be kept open because the light from the window lights the landing. Fixing the heating and putting some lighting on the landing are unacceptable solutions.

Summerwhereareyou · 15/08/2023 16:56

Op, this way Maddness lies.

I know people have very black and white thinking over this stuff and it's clearly challenging you.

My bedroom window is usually open at varying degrees all year around. I also have any radiator on because I want heat abd fresh air throughout covid where we worked we had to have windows open and the heating on and we weren't definitely warmer than with out it on.

I really think you need to let this go it's one window. Close it when you are in there. I think it's much more hygienic to keep it open.

IMustDoMoreExercise · 15/08/2023 18:04

turkeytwizzlerss · 14/08/2023 21:44

How do you know if someone is inside?

I don't see the point of having the radiator on in the bathroom and the bathroom window open as well.

Also the radiator in my bedroom doesn't work (long story) so In winter I'm generally cold without any window open... so I would like the heat form the corridor to reach my bedroom.

Show quote history

Can't you put a lock on the bathroom door?

BelleShazzasFeast · 15/08/2023 18:05

turkeytwizzlerss · 14/08/2023 22:54

It's the worst isn't it.... but I would have thought she would have used the air freshener?

Show quote history

Air freshener ought to be banned.

It's revolting.

Cakesandbabes · 15/08/2023 18:13

How are her washing machine habits...

JanieEyre · 15/08/2023 18:17

DustyLee123 · 14/08/2023 21:37

My bathroom windows are open all the time, except when I am out.

Why? It's totally unnecessary unless you're drying clothes or something similar in there.

JanieEyre · 15/08/2023 18:19

Summerwhereareyou · 15/08/2023 16:56

Op, this way Maddness lies.

I know people have very black and white thinking over this stuff and it's clearly challenging you.

My bedroom window is usually open at varying degrees all year around. I also have any radiator on because I want heat abd fresh air throughout covid where we worked we had to have windows open and the heating on and we weren't definitely warmer than with out it on.

I really think you need to let this go it's one window. Close it when you are in there. I think it's much more hygienic to keep it open.

It seems to me that this is madness. Why on earth would you pay a fortune to heat a room with an open window? If it was more hygienic, logically you would do this in every room.

QuillBill · 15/08/2023 18:22

The idea of fogging up the smelly air with air freshener rather than opening the window and letting fresh air into the room is not a pleasant thought.

Schemes · 15/08/2023 18:23

If it was more hygienic, logically you would do this in every room.

Yes, I would do it in every room if I was shitting in every room and releasing steam into every room.

bellac11 · 15/08/2023 18:26

All the upstairs windows are open all year round, houses need fresh air.

UghStopSnoring · 15/08/2023 18:38

LolaSmiles · 15/08/2023 16:52

YellowDots
We're the same as you. Windows get opened in the morning, bathroom window is usually open and the door from the bathroom to the landing is kept closed.

I sometimes suspect a lot of the sales of air freshener sprays are driven by people who hardly ventilate their houses and then liberally fill the air with stuff to make it smell 'nice'.

UghStopSnoring it's not kept open when people are using the bathroom. It's apparently got to be kept open at all other times because there's a radiator in the bathroom and OP wants the heat to trickle down to her bedroom that has broken heating, and it also has to be kept open because the light from the window lights the landing. Fixing the heating and putting some lighting on the landing are unacceptable solutions.

Thanks! This is clearly quite a complex situation…

AnxiousFairyQueen · 15/08/2023 18:49

This thread is bonkers! Why should the lodger be entitled to leave open a bathroom window when they’re not paying the heating bill and aren’t even in the bathroom?

And why the hell should the lodger care about the ventilation of someone else’s bathroom? Bizarre!

Rooroo42 · 15/08/2023 19:08

turkeytwizzlerss · 14/08/2023 21:49

She's also never opened her window in her bedroom all summer lol.... so I don't understand the fresh air argument. Is it a germ argument?

How do you know? Have you been in her bedroom to check?

notthebestideas · 15/08/2023 19:36

I also don't understand why anyone needs heating on in August. That would concern me more in terms of heating bills and the environmental factor. It really isn't that cold even if it's raining.

People think differently about bathroom ventilation (due to what goes on in there: steam, smells etc) than other rooms but the bathroom window does not need to be open all day and all night. Tell her. Your house, your rules!

Paddleboarder · 15/08/2023 19:40

I never close my bathroom window, even in the depths of winter. But it's not really a big deal, if she's your lodger it's presumably your house, so tell her to shut it when she's not in there. She's probably not really fussed about whether you get mould in the bathroom or not!

If it was her bedroom though that would be different. You can't really dictate how much fresh air someone wants. I can't sleep unless I've got my bedroom window open.

K83 · 15/08/2023 19:49

I live in the UK, our bathroom window is open all the time, I sometimes close it when I have a shower, then open it when I'm out, I think it makes everything feel fresher. Although I do often have my bedroom window open, including night time, even in winter.

soupmaker · 15/08/2023 19:53

Cakesandbabes · 15/08/2023 18:13

How are her washing machine habits...

That's what I was wondering too!

jolaylasofia · 15/08/2023 19:56

turkeytwizzlerss · 14/08/2023 22:22

I don't understand why her bedroom windows are never open.... even in summer and these hot days.... yet constantly had the bathroom window open....

Which is what I'm wondering? Is it a hygiene thing?

Show quote history

Is the toilet in the bathroom? maybe she doesn’t want you to know when she uses the loo and she doesn’t want to smell you either

Catxxxxxxxxxx · 15/08/2023 20:02

Erm.. knock??? Wtf

mummydoris2006 · 15/08/2023 20:27

turkeytwizzlerss · 14/08/2023 22:43

Can anyone explain how she's "cold" yet also keeps the bathroom window open?

Surely if you are cold you would be shutting windows?

Yes, I'm pretty sure your lodger can, but you seem hellbent on getting an answer from an anonymous internet forum.
What is the reason you can't speak to her about now and have to wait until Winter? Bonkers!!

nameitagain · 15/08/2023 20:30

EhrlicheFrau · 15/08/2023 07:35

YABU.
Windows need to be opened all year round - not all day but at least briefly. Keep vents open too unless it's really windy, they're there for a reason.

You need to read with more comprehension. The OP hasn't said anything about never opening the window. They have said they don't want it open all the time. All day. Just after the bathroom is used. When the OP later closes it, the lodger reopens it. YABU for commenting without reading anything

nameitagain · 15/08/2023 20:31

bellac11 · 15/08/2023 18:26

All the upstairs windows are open all year round, houses need fresh air.

They don't need to be open 24/7. An hour a day is plenty in winter.

nameitagain · 15/08/2023 20:33

Summerwhereareyou · 15/08/2023 16:56

Op, this way Maddness lies.

I know people have very black and white thinking over this stuff and it's clearly challenging you.

My bedroom window is usually open at varying degrees all year around. I also have any radiator on because I want heat abd fresh air throughout covid where we worked we had to have windows open and the heating on and we weren't definitely warmer than with out it on.

I really think you need to let this go it's one window. Close it when you are in there. I think it's much more hygienic to keep it open.

The OP has said whenever she closes it, the lodger reopens it. It's weird. It's the OPs house. In the public spaces, a lodger doesn't get to dictate.

Summerwhereareyou · 15/08/2023 20:33

It's just the bathroom.

Summerwhereareyou · 15/08/2023 20:34

The bathing room is not used like a living room where I would agreed more too and fro working would be messed