To stay in a job that's really tough going for the money?

[Hop27]

I appreciate I'm in a fortunate position...but. I've found myself in a very good job, but with it comes long long hours, weekend work stress and general grind and I dislike it more that love it. But I've managed to gain equity and we are going through massive growth so I could end up with a very sizeable financial reward over the next 10 years 'if' we achieve our forecasts. My salary is more than I ever thought I'd be in the position to earn. DH, DSS and I have a really nice lifestyle. Through work I get lots of bonuses as we are privately owned, and some 'personal expenses' are covered by work.
We could live on one wage, either mine or DH but lifestyle would move if I wanted to make a change. I wouldn't get as strong an equity position if I moved firm in the same industry, and if I'm honest it would be the same expectation. I assume most people don't 'love' their jobs, so at least I'm benefiting financially. I'm early 40's do I just grind out the next 10 years and reap the rewards? Get DSS through uni, house deposit or do I chase a pipe dream of being happy in my work?

If you're working late nights and weekends and you can survive on one salary for a while, absolutely I would seek a new career path with less stress. You could retrain for something else. Or ask for flexible work or part time at your current job so you have time to study or look for a different job?

It doesn’t sound like the OP’s job would be compatible with this kind of flexible/part-time working though.

From what you describe it sounds like a horrible way to live your life.

long long hours, weekend work stress and general grind

Do you have time for family life, hobbies, social life, your relationship, relaxing in your home? It doesn't sound like it. I don't think any job is worth missing out on these things. But if I were earning a huge salary I'd definitely be tempted to stay, I suppose. Not to the point of unhappiness and possibly ruining my emotional health however.

I've been a self-employed creative for years and actually earn good money. & have staff. But some family still look down their nose a bit - even those that I out-earn. Who cares, thats their feelings of inadequacy showing up. You shouldn't care too much what people think. Anyway, maybe see how you feel in 5 years. & in your shoes I'd retire at 60 whilst still active enough to enjoy all that money

Agreeing with you. have had a friend die within the last 12 months at 46 of breast cancer leaving behind young children. It makes you look at life differently.

My question now is if I was to die or get sick tomorrow, would it matter? I couldn't do a job I hated and gave so much of myself too, not for any money and to sacrifice happiness.

Cartier watch is a short term hit of happiness but will it matter on your death bed. Hell no.

Material things don't matter, as long as you have sufficient to pay the bills the rest is just a bonus

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There's a thread atm about people who just hate working no matter what the job is.

Ironically, if you're going to hate working no matter what, it does sort of make sense to have an extremely stressful but very highly paid job. You won't hate it any more than anything else and at least you'll get a lot of money out of it. It would also help you to retire early.

Thing is- I don't think some people who choose high stress, high status careers do hate their jobs. I think they might not like or feel passionate about what they do but often do like the stress and the status that comes with being in a busy, high stress job. Amd of course the money!

I have seen it in my sector where people often come from these types of jobs to get a better work/life balance and some seem incapable or unwilling to do so.

10 year exit plan. Work hard but cut back on the weekends where you can, save money, take the bonuses if they come then leave as soon as your contract allows to find something else.

This is the type of thing where you might have big regret if you don’t follow though, especially as this could set your family up for later life.

I left my job at the end of last year because I chased the money and fast forward to now and I'm going back to my old job for less pay because I've realised money isn't everything.

The new job was the most toxic work environment I've ever worked in with a ridiculous staff turnover. Work/life balance was non existent and I was close to burnout and didn't recognise myself anymore.

The stress just isn't worth it and it's no good for your health, you might think you are fine but the stress will catch up with you eventually so take care of yourself and remember that you are always just a number on the payroll.

I agree. Workaholics are real, as are money-driven people. Could be for the benefits of the money, or could be because they thrive on measurable outcomes. Many people love a fast moving, high stress, highly paid career. And that's OK.

But I'm just saying that if you hate working in any job at all, then perhaps you might as well work a difficult job with lots of money as an easy one with very little, since you'll hate the latter just as much - and have to do it for longer to get a retirement fund!

You will never get this time back and 10 years is way too long to be feeling overworked, stressed and overall unhappy. Either decide you are making a real change in your current role and switch off at weekends and evenings or find another job. Life is too short.

I vote grind and buy in help.

If you have equity, can they get rid of you? I ask because a PP mentioned coasting and I wonder if you could do that a little. What do other partners do? (I'm assuming you're a partner at a management consultancy; please forgive me if I've got the wrong end of the stick.)

I went for the grind, but speaking from experience, be careful that you have an exit plan, so you’re not trapped in for another 10 years after that. Plan you finances and commitments very carefully so you can adjust to a drop in salary when you want to step off.

I was in the same position pre-Covid. Didn’t like my job, the stress levels and hours were high but so was the salary. I felt trapped, but ultimately it was taken out of my hands, I was made redundant. But.. I’m now in a job I love, the work/life balance is great and I don’t have any mornings where I feel like I just don’t want to work (there were many before!) The downside? I’m now on a pretty average salary. I can do all the basics and can throw in a few treats. I’d absolutely take my life now over the one I had 3 years ago!

But why go wild with the £40k and go to Cartier? If you hate your job, save it to give yourself a cushion for if you ever decide to quit and take a pay cut or to make retiring as early as possible comfortable etc. It seems as if you’re unhappy and buying yourself things to cheer yourself up which in turn makes you depend on the money from your job to make you happy. You’ve chosen a career based on other people’s perceptions of your success and worth. They aren’t the ones who have to do the job for the next ten years.

Save the bonus. Use it to help you walk away and do something you actually like doing. Think about your materialism and how really it’s leaving you unfulfilled. One life, and all that.

You’re right, I expressed myself badly. I am talking about people like the OP, who do have options but are not enjoying their lives. Exchanging a happy life for Cartier jewellery (or cars or whatnot) is where I lose respect.

This.

I'd say stick it for as long as you can.
Save, save, save for: the rainy day, the day you chuck it, the day the company goes bust.
Nothing is assured.
Have a little fun, but don't piss it up the wall.

Similar situation. Have you considered just not doing as much work but keeping the job? Do your job, but don’t push to continually exceed the criteria?

Interesting discussion, sort of been in the same place. So I also had a high salary job, but with very long hours, stress, kids in school clubs/holiday camps. I was made redundant.
My new job is very rewarding, I am sector leading, I feel very valued. It's also a charity and therefore I am rightly on a lower salary, not low but considerably less than before.
So, I now have a job I love, a brilliantly supportive team, a Chair who constantly tells me to cut back hours, work/life balance, etc etc. It's everything I've ever wanted.
However, it comes at a cost. We had a lifestyle that cannot be supported by my salary reduction. We are struggling, not helped by cost of living increases but having to make deliberate cutbacks and changes. I had hoped to have mortgage paid off, now we are a number of years away. DD about to start at Uni, we have savings from before to help her, but we can't give any extra, as it isn't there.
Currently thinking about whether to go back into the high stress environment or trying a new self employed option (other risks).

I would make a list of what it is you don't like about your job and then honestly ask yourself if these things exist at all or most jobs, especially at that pay.
The biggest problem with hating your job is that it may lead to lashing out at those closest to you and may also lead to impulsive quitting.
My advice without knowing more is to look at your time management to see if you are using it wisely and also look at who you work with to see if you are doing work that is rightfully theirs.
another thing to do is start saving. Once again, hating your job can lead to pleasure seeking impulses, like spending the money you worked so hard for or looking for companionship that doesn't share your worries. I am not saying never spend, never enjoy-I am saying put aside a set amount for it and don't go over it. The rest you should save.
You say both of you are doing well and could live on one income. Well, aim for that. Both of you start putting aside a large percentage of your income into savings and live off an amount you budget.
giving a financial accountant a few hundred dollars to help you build a budget, savings, and investment plan can save/earn you a lot of money in the long run.

I've got a good job that I love and pays well enough that I'm very comfortable. I live intentionally to make sure that I enjoy life; it's very short. Living a life you don't enjoy for a watch that says Cartier is however one of the saddest things I've ever read on here. I almost feel sorry for OP.

Your pay rise is nearly my entire salary! My job sounds similarly stressful and I’m looking at 2 years max before I step back and take a pay cut. I’d like to walk tomorrow but want to get my dses through university and then I can rebalance my work life.

It’s good to have an exit plan and don’t become too reliant on a high income. I’d hate to ever feel I can’t walk because of money. Knowing I could just quit and we would cope helps me stay. I won’t quit because loyalty won’t let me but if I had a complete burnout breakdown which could happen, we would survive.

I don't understand your OP. Life is too short to be frazzled for the sake of money. You'll just be resentful at all the time you wasted being miserable. Maybe you can self finance your ideal creative job (depending what it is) if you can budget it for it out of maybe a few more years work? I'd have to leave the job though as stress takes too much of a toll.