So many child haters here

[Sabrinasummersamples]

So many threads on here seem to attract the same sort of answer along the lines of
-In my day we'd have got a smack. Never did me any harm. Give em a clip round the ear.
-kids today are entitled shrieky brats
-kids should stand for adults
-kids shouldn't be allowed in restaurants

Yet often those same posters are the first to call "agism" when people disagree.
Why do so many people hold such contempt for kids?
I mean I know kids can be annoying but honestly you could say that about any group of people. Plus we were all kids once 🤷

@Ifeelsuchflutterings same. I work with kids aged 15-19. They're bloody brilliant. Enthusiastic, engaged, funny and kind. Brilliant people. They're not cute but why would they need to be?

@Needsomeadvice33 I disagree! I like kids generally. Babies are sweet but mine are grown and I don't ever want to go back to that stage thank you. No sleep, endless nappies, sore boobs etc. Older children are a joy to watch grow and have increasingly interesting conversations with. I like the company of my teens and friends, teens can be delightful - full of joie de vivre. They don't seem to moan or brood over things as much as (some) older people do, which is refreshing.

@Ifeelsuchflutterings I strongly disagree. From what I see around me mothers all favour the youngest child and display annoyance towards the behaviours of the other kids who aren't babies/toddlers anymore. Plus they all buy a puppy when their youngest kids become a child as clearly they are all looking for something cute to nurture when their children no longer fulfill this role. We are designed to raise our children to be independent adults so biologically it makes sense we stop producing endorphins to 'baby' them. The MAJORITY of people I know tollerate kids around them. You to me, are certainly the minority. Also people who volunteer with kids are an extreme minority so if anything this example invalidates your argument. I'm not saying you can't find kids maybe interesting at times but most don't want random kids in their space and nobody finds 10-16 year olds cute as we are not biologically programmed to do so, they have lost all of those features that trigger the oxytocin release that is needed to increase survivability in infanthood.

@Needsomeadvice33 I couldn’t disagree more. I think kids are absolutely brilliant. I find them to be generally much more empathetic, curious, imaginative, open minded and forgiving than adults - among other positive qualities.

@Sabrinasummersamples I don't see them as lesser at all. I just wouldn't be delusional that the general public would find anything appealing about a couple of 8 year olds. We can agree to disagree.

I can’t relate to this

Do you have dc?

I wonder how your child will feel when they realise you only actually wanted them until they were 5 years old and then tolerated them the rest of the time

There are words for mothers who think like that about their children but I would probably get deleted if I called you them

For anyone on the thread who thought childfree people were selfish... This is real selfishness, having a child you plan on tolerating when it's not cute enough for you to care about anymore.

I bloody hope they don't have kids! I'm going to guess the answer is no though since they have absolutely no clue what they're talking about.
Why would someone have to be cute to be likeable? Honestly we're talking humans, not bunnies.

@CloudyMcCloud yes. As does everyone I know. I generally see this pattern in everyone around me and all my friends and relatives complain about their older kids and generally have a low tolerance for their behaviours, though I've yet to reach that stage. I also noticed a shift with everyone's tolerance for my nieces and nephews when they left toddlerhood.

She's pregnant with her first which apparently means she knows everything there is to know about motherhood and how to have a loving relationship with your child 🙄

I mean I'm infertile and I have a better handle on how to treat kids over the age of 5...

@Sabrinasummersamples I'm not saying they have to be cute to be likeable to their families but in public spaces with random people it helps . People tollerate a crying baby over a screeching child as like I said their is the biological effect of tollerance.

So you think you’ll only tolerate your dc when they’re past five?

No because I think its different with people's own children because you love them. Every women I know tells me they don't like others children. I thought this thread was about people's random kids in public spaces.

But I generally see women being less tolerant of their older children yes. Like I said that's not something I've experienced. Most of my friends and family are very open of the realities of motherhood.

Why the hell are you having a baby if you don't like any kids over the age of 4 or 5? Jesus. Poor kid.

No there was plenty of space. I actually moved in there because, at this point, it was quieter than the room I'd just left. Believe me, they actually remarked 'oh this room is quieter' and then gathered there with their children, driving the two existing occupants out with their noise.
You say you're not trying to be argumentative, but seem determined to find excuses for these parents behaviour.

Because they will be my own child and I will love them. Which is different than random kids. I will also not inflict their annoy behaviours on others in public spaces as I will be aware of the realities of this.

@Needsomeadvice33 The thing is the human race would not have lasted very long if everyone was intolerant of people over 5.

@user9630721458 but it does though because women are biologically driven to have babies. Nobody is biologically driven to have a 12 year old. People say "I want a baby" . The baby becomes a child who the mother now loves. This is very different than how people generally feel about other people's children.

They will make friends, you know, and invite them over! You will get to know many more children than you can imagine, and if you want your child to have friends you will have to learn to be good with other kids, not just tolerate them.

I work in a school, and if what you say was true I'd be fucked.Hell , anyone above y1 would be and you'd find no staff for the other key stages. In fact, I prefer KS2, and always ask for that and I find the EYFS absolutely terrifying. And I actually do like the kids I work with (some I'd even say love)and enjoy their company, their personalities,the way their brains work. Even (especially?!?) the tricky ones.

Oh, and btw, even y6 's can be cute and endearing.

I like kind, well/mannered children, of which there are many; unfortunately, there appear to be many more loud, obnoxious, spoilt ones — those whose parents wanted to be friends and never bothered with boundaries.

*well-mannered 🙄

I'm aware of this, I will tollerate them because I love the child and this is an important part of child development. We all have to tollerate a lot in life. I currently tollerate a lot of my friends children who cause chaos in public spaces when we meet running around cafes etc and screeching. The toddlers and babies sit in high chairs and are generally more tollerable in public spaces. I'm just saying comments that are universally recognised, its bizarre that women are so triggered. Literally every women I know tells me it's "different with your own" and " I don't liek other people's children". I'm not English, maybe this is the difference. I don't know any mummies in real life like on this thread. My friends and family openly admit their kids re annoying, they are also very good mums and their kids are having very good life's. This seems cultural to me.

You’re a bit all over the shop with this. In your earlier post

I think most women want babies and toddlers and then just tollerate the kids they become.

Stating you think you’ll only tolerate the kids they become. Which is bizarre thinking tbh