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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shocked that a man in his mid-twenties does not work for a living?

611 replies

queenofsheep · 01/08/2023 16:48

DD's boyfriend, older than DD by a year, does not work. He got his degree, now lives off rental income and an allowance through a family trust fund. AIBU to be shocked that there are men/boys in their twenties who are allowed to do this?

He and DD seem happy. DD isn't concerned at all. He insists that it is work because he has to manage his houses. He and DD go on nice holidays and attend parties.

OP posts:
Giantwindows · 01/08/2023 18:08

You’re just coming across as jealous OP.

Marwoodsbigbreak · 01/08/2023 18:08

queenofsheep · 01/08/2023 18:05

Well, if you've ever had a real job and had to get bossed around by your superiors and colleagues, I think he's taken the easy way out in comparison...

Show quote history

What’s the value in that? Some kind of martyrdom? Why would anyone expose themselves to this if they didn’t have to?

You would be incredibly stupid to make that choice.

EnthENd · 01/08/2023 18:09

Landlording is a business.

He's obviously been given a big leg up by having rich parents, but he's still working.

SamW98 · 01/08/2023 18:10

I know a man who’s now over 60 and hrs been living off rental income from houses he purchased with an inheritance when he was 19.
I wouldn’t do a 9-5 if I didn’t have to and had the money not to.

wildlifeobserver1 · 01/08/2023 18:11

queenofsheep · 01/08/2023 18:05

Well, if you've ever had a real job and had to get bossed around by your superiors and colleagues, I think he's taken the easy way out in comparison...

Show quote history

You sound jealous. Why would he want to do something harder if he doesn’t have to?

GoodChat · 01/08/2023 18:11

Well, if you've ever had a real job and had to get bossed around by your superiors and colleagues, I think he's taken the easy way out in comparison...

No, he's got lucky.
He's studied and got his degree so he's not an idiot. He's landed on his feet. His family wouldn't trust him if he wasn't up to the job.

JesusWeptLady · 01/08/2023 18:11

Some people have always lived like this, it's not a new phenomenon. Lucky them.

Newusernamebecause · 01/08/2023 18:11

After reading your replies, you seem very judgemental about this. Try to remember that's he's not your boyfriend and that it's not up to you.

Spirallingdownwards · 01/08/2023 18:11

drpet49 · 01/08/2023 17:01

I wouldn’t be attracted a man who didn’t earn a honest living.

Fortunately this lad does

Happyhappyeveryday · 01/08/2023 18:11

He sounds both fortunate and financially savvy. If I were her, I’d think he was a good catch (assuming he treats her well, of course!)

PriamFarrl · 01/08/2023 18:12

so bitter. You had to suffer and so should everyone else.

If you won the lottery tomorrow would you carry on working? I bloody wouldn’t.

GoodChat · 01/08/2023 18:12

OP are you worried your daughter will favour his family over yours or start judging your success?

mydogspooeybum · 01/08/2023 18:13

You do sound so very jealous and judgemental.

Nanny0gg · 01/08/2023 18:13

queenofsheep · 01/08/2023 18:05

Well, if you've ever had a real job and had to get bossed around by your superiors and colleagues, I think he's taken the easy way out in comparison...

Show quote history

So he's managing a property business?

Why is that not work? Estate Agents do it

What's a 'real' job?

Catcatcatcatcat · 01/08/2023 18:13

Oh God @queenofsheep are you one of those people who says they would carry on working their factory job if they won the lottery?

Lots of people don’t need employment; so long as they are living fulfilling and happy lives, what’s your issue? I just don’t understand.

crumpet · 01/08/2023 18:14

Many people with an independent income don’t have a 9-5 page job. Many don’t work at all.

LakeTiticaca · 01/08/2023 18:15

We are not quite living under a dictatorship (yet) so I guess he is allowed to do this.
Are you certain he's not actually a drugs baron?

Exasperatednow · 01/08/2023 18:15

It all sounds fine. Maybe you need to widen your perspective about what 'work' is.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 01/08/2023 18:15

drpet49 · 01/08/2023 17:01

I wouldn’t be attracted a man who didn’t earn a honest living.

What is dishonest about his income?

Terraria · 01/08/2023 18:16

Nothing new, many people don't work because they inherited wealth.

DaisyThistle · 01/08/2023 18:16

If he's a good landlord with several properties, that is a job, even if it's not full time. Decorating and maintaining the tenancies, troubleshooting issues with utilities, vetting tenants etc - these all take time.

pointythings · 01/08/2023 18:16

He doesn't need to work, so why should he take up a job someone else will actually need?

Put away the envy-tinted glasses and wind your neck in.

Strokethefurrywall · 01/08/2023 18:17

Oh no! Someone's found a legitimate way to create a passive income, treats your daughter well and is educated and you don't like that he's "taken the easy way out".

Get a grip, you sound absolutely ridiculous.

BlastedIce · 01/08/2023 18:17

queenofsheep · 01/08/2023 18:05

Well, if you've ever had a real job and had to get bossed around by your superiors and colleagues, I think he's taken the easy way out in comparison...

Show quote history

You don’t Anne keen on work yourself, would you not give up work if you could?

Shoulddomore · 01/08/2023 18:18

Ofcourse property management is a job. How many properties does he have?