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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New friend - odd?

183 replies

BeelziBob · 31/07/2023 16:50

I recently made friends with a woman and I’m starting to think she’s a bit off but maybe I’m being judgemental??

Anyway we arranged to go for a walk yesterday morning in the park and then go for a coffee. Half hour before we were due to meet its pissing it down so I assumed the walk was off … I messaged her and put “have you seen the weather? What do you want to do?” And she replied with “park? It might stop soon and I don’t mind the rain”. Ok, neither do I but it was really coming down.

So anyway I set off, arrived in car park and it’s now torrential rain, really hammering off the car. I messaged her from my car to ask if she was there yet and she replied saying she was sat on a bench and she’ll walk up??!! I couldn’t even see out of my car window!! So I put my rain coat off and went to meet her. She walked up absolutely wet through, no coat on, rain literally streaming down her face, sandals on. We walked for a bit and then she said we should sit and have a coffee … great … expect she meant get a coffee from a kiosk and sit on a bench!!? I said I didn’t think that was a good idea due to the torrential rain we were currently stood in. We carried on walking for a bit, she fell over, finally got back into my car absolutely soaked and she is stood next to my window wanting to chat!! I told her to get in the car!

isn’t all this a bit weird or am I just a wimp with the rain?

OP posts:
Chocolatelabradorsarethebest · 31/07/2023 17:48

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 31/07/2023 16:55

You're a wimp with the rain, no one will melt if they get rained on.

Exactly, as my DM used to say 'don't be silly, it's only water, you know how to use a towel'!

ProfessorInkling · 31/07/2023 17:50

Bet she has gills.

Pinkitydrinkity · 31/07/2023 17:50

It is a bit strange, but why did you agree to it!?

PoseyFlump · 31/07/2023 17:51

Soft play 😂😂

But seriously OP, could your new friend have misconstrued your friendship for the start of a relationship? Perhaps she didn't want to cancel in case she didn't see you again. (Just covering all bases)

WhateverMate · 31/07/2023 17:52

Pinkitydrinkity · 31/07/2023 17:50

It is a bit strange, but why did you agree to it!?

The OP has so far not answered this question.

Keykaty · 31/07/2023 17:53

Sounds like a person who has just taken some hefty anti-rain medication.

I don't think it's normal not to care about being soaked to the skin and wanting to continue that torture. Surely?

Only meet up when the weather forecast is for SUN in future, but her attitude to deluges does seem a bit odd.

Spidey66 · 31/07/2023 17:53

I wouldn't mind light rain to get somewhere eg cafe, pub, cinema (though I'm too old for soft play!) but I wouldn't even walk my very energetic, outdoor loving border collie out in torrential rain!

Jellytotsburnmytongue · 31/07/2023 17:53

🤣 the idea of her falling over is making me laugh more than it probably should. How did she fall? Did she just jump back up again and pretend it hadn't happened?

drhf · 31/07/2023 17:53

YABU for coming on AIBU to ask if YABU.

Your friend approached the rain in her own idiosyncratic way. You approached it differently. The two of you struggled to communicate about how to resolve this in a way that suits you both.

One perspective would be that the differences between you, and the communication difficulties between you, make for an entertaining adventure in human nature. Another perspective is that she is too different from you to be a suitable friend for you when you have limited time.to expend on friendships.

Both are reasonable. Only you (and your friend) know which perspective is right for you both.

Good luck!

TulipCat · 31/07/2023 17:53

Chocolatelabradorsarethebest · 31/07/2023 17:48

Exactly, as my DM used to say 'don't be silly, it's only water, you know how to use a towel'!

Show quote history

I have yet to encounter a towel that dries clothing adequately.....

StBrides · 31/07/2023 17:54

Ah this thread is cracking me up 😄

Wowokthanks · 31/07/2023 17:54

Lol I'm just imagining this woman, no coat, sandals, soaked through, with a hot chocolate on the bench in a park....by choice.

It is a bit odd, the whole situation. I can't imagine saying, I'm not bloody going out for a walk in that! I'll pick you up for coffee inside!

StBrides · 31/07/2023 17:57

I'm sorry,op, but I have to ask...was it really, genuinely torrential??

The only way her endearingly bonkers behaviour makes sense is if you have a tendency to exaggerate the weather! 😄

CantFindTheBeat · 31/07/2023 17:57

How did you make friends with her, OP, what's the connection?

I think the typical response to 'it's chucking it down, what do you want to do?', would be 'reschedule'.

Smallceramicfrog · 31/07/2023 17:59

I love the rain, whenever it rains really heavily I stand in the back garden in it with my face up to the sky like a right weirdo. I think it’s from living in an extremely hot country for years where the rain was a relief. I still do it now I’m home but I’ve always enjoyed the rain and would happily walk in heavy rain and rarely wear a coat…I didn’t realise what weirdo everyone must think I am 😅oh well.

Oceanus · 31/07/2023 18:05

No friendship is worth pneumonia for.

BinnityBoo · 31/07/2023 18:06

This literally made me laugh out loud just the thought of it, so thanks for the laugh🤣 that is so odd though and I wouldn't have been able to hold back from saying something at the time!

AndIKnewYouMeantIt · 31/07/2023 18:07

It's a socially accepted norm to not want to be unmoving in the rain, as in, not walking together to a destination. I'd struggle to hide my confusion if someone suggested sitting in it for a coffee. I would say you were unreasonable not to say no as surely she has encountered this with other friends - don't be such a people-pleaser!

guvguv · 31/07/2023 18:10

My autistic sibling does things like this all the time. Things that seem totally logical to her and absolutely bizarre to everyone else. E.g. Going to a wedding barefoot, or having a nap in the middle of the room everyone is socialising in, or spending the night in a hotel lobby instead of booking a room. I would strongly suspect autism.

Peach0123 · 31/07/2023 18:12

StBrides · 31/07/2023 17:54

Ah this thread is cracking me up 😄

Me too 🤣

NightShiftDrama · 31/07/2023 18:18

I have to ask....how did you two meet??

TortolaParadise · 31/07/2023 18:20

Jellytotsburnmytongue · 31/07/2023 17:53

🤣 the idea of her falling over is making me laugh more than it probably should. How did she fall? Did she just jump back up again and pretend it hadn't happened?

This is what I wanted to know but didn't want to ask. 😂(Thanks for asking)

VonWeasel · 31/07/2023 18:20

This is hilarious and made me wonder if it was a crazy friend of mine you had met up with 🤣 This sounds exactly like the kind of nonsense she would have suggested although there would have also been an additional layer of drama with a lost bag/wallet/keys/marbles thrown in there too!!!

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 31/07/2023 18:22

😯

She’s a MERMAID!

namitynamechange · 31/07/2023 18:24

You are both a bit weird. Her for seemingly not minding the rain (although I love torrential downpours). You for admitting on Mumsnet you DO mind the rain but also completely failing to communicate this to her directly. It's like some odd game of wet weather chicken. It's also possibly the most English thread ever.