To insist my husband not buy this desk?

[Mastmw7g]

We bought a home. One of the rooms is very small and we agreed it would be a place for my husband to work as well as a room for guests, most notably my oldest daughter from a previous marriage who's 20 years old. Then someone my husband knows bought an expensive, massive desk he says he's going to get. There isn't even room for a sofa if he gets this desk. Also, it costs 30% of the whole budget for furniture for the new home. He suggested my 20 year old could sleep with her 10 year old sister when she visits. Or we could get a sofa bed downstairs. I never would have picked this house if I knew there wouldn't be a room for her to have privacy from her much younger brothers and sister.

To be honest is sounds like you should have bought a bigger house, but you can't now. I think a garden office is the solution. Computers in bedrooms are really not a great idea.

standing yes, sitting on a yoga ball yes, walking na.

Also you can get a chair bed rather than a sofa bed which will take up less room - I have the habitat Roma chair bed in my office

That looks great! Perfect solution

That desk is a cheap one. Not worth the money. He does need a bigger desk but it’s only now he’s changing the playing field. As you say, you wouldn’t have agreed on the house if you’d known that.

Have a look for a proper set up that you can arrange/fold up so that there is room for a bed too.

eurgh what an awful ideal. The desk Photo looks so ugly and awful too. Sorry I just couldn’t have that monstrosity in my home!

Agree with your sentiments OP. Nice sofa bed that folds out to small double and he can have a desk too. Therefore he has a nice working space and you have the sofabed for your daughter and other guests.

Google is your friend. Show him what you visualise

https://www.ikea.com/gb/en/p/kivik-1-seat-sofa-bed-tresund-light-beige-s49470240/?gclsrc=aw.ds&gclid=CjwKCAjwq4imBhBQEiwA9Nx1BrMFtLjGyZfvs9tRcWI4nIv21nQUWljr9SZYzSdDvp7PG3xZUx2jsBoC4jUQAvD_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds

even this is nice if the room is tiny and would then fit a desk as well.

Your daughter can share with you when she returns and he can sleep elsewhere. I would always put my daughter first.

He sounds awful. Sorry you have to live with this.

I bought a walking pad off gumtree for £100 and a cycle desk from wiggle (£50). It rolls to the side and isn’t a main desk - you can take it into two parts. I just switch to laptop only when I want to use the pad so don’t move my big screen

I did this to make sure I would use a further investment in desk tech but actually it’s fine.

I bet the bulk of that amount is for the walking treadmill. Not everyone funds them comfortable. Has he tried to walk and type at the same time? I was considering it but I read that for some people it causes issues with arm and back pains.

I suspect you have all missed the point, possibly including the OP???

Surely the massive inflated price for this desk INCLUDES THE TREADMILL. I bet this is being marketed as integral to this desk, can exercise while working etc etc.

So your DH is suddenly trying to introduce a gym aspect to his workspace without pre-discussion, and it is this that potentially crowds the DD out.

This sneaky move, so that the office becomes a private gym, introduces loads of extra levels of discussion - can we both use the treadmill (assuming the OP would like to)? Or if not, yes, that's your room - you can sleep there all the time you selfish bastard when DD comes over but you have to plan the room so that sleeping is possible.

At a minimum, point out to him that including a treadmill with a desk is simply an overpriced marketing ploy, and buying a more sensible, less old fashioned desk with separate treadmill will save loads of money. You can get folding treadmills which will disappear fairly effectively when DD stays, opening up options again. At the moment he seems determined to give money to an overpriced company when he could get all the things he wants far cheaper, and probably nicer, by engaging his braincells a bit more and being a bit more considerate.

My friend bought some kind of leg cycling doodad from Amazon that sits beneath a regular desk so she sits and works and cycles her legs round. If he’s not willing to consider that sort of solution, he’s just penis waving. Given he intends to go into work if your daughter visits he’s basically pissing up walls and marking his territory to prevent her visiting.

The best compromise here is LTB he works in the bedroom with a decent-size desk, a standing one if he wants or with a cycle leg gadget thing, whatever, for much less of the household furniture budget. And you get the spare room to set up as a spare room plus office space for you. Absolutely no reason for him to argue with this use of space other than he wants a man cave and to commandeer a whole room for only him. Whereas whether you work in the bedroom or spare room, you plan to make the room multipurpose.

Those under desk walking treadmills are only like £200 anyway and can be moved. So he can still have a treadmill if he wants

Where does your DD live now OP? At 20 your daughter should still have a space to come back to, should things go tits up. He's misled you and will have to find somewhere else to work.

potential new desk looks huge, current desk looks cramped. Can he not buy a desk that fits the room in an in between size? Is the cost mainly for the treadmill rather than the desk?

No waybis that desk worth the price he had suggested. As others have said his current desk is clearly too small but I am sure there's some compromise to be had where you can fit a larger desk and some sort of fold out single into the room....what are the room dimensions, is it really tiny?

Plenty of good advice here already about using money and desk space more efficiently. Also, that it’s not ideal to have your computer in the bedroom.

But I’m concerned about his domineering behaviour. He’s not your boss. It sounds as if he’s trying to push your DD out, and make it harder for you to have any guests staying. And how much time does an adult man and father need to spend gaming?

DH worked comfortably at home for years on a smallish desk, with just keyboard and screen on the desk and the rest underneath.

All my adult life I’ve had room for visitors, even if I then had to sleep on the floor in a shared flat! As soon as I had my own place and worked from home, I had a study-guest room.

Don’t let him isolate you from friends and family.

Read the OP's posts.
Her H gets the final word on everything that's in the house.

I work from home permanently and I've had this desk for years
https://www.ikea.com/gb/en/p/micke-desk-white-30213076/ It fits my monitor up high and a small laptop infront. I use dual screens one on top of the other, I then just keep my drink, mouse and notepad and pen on there. Everything else is kept in the drawer below. It's fine.

Good advice

Someone mentioned studybed earlier in this thread. We have one and it is amazing.
The desk has lots of space and my husband is very pleased with it. He works from home and has a very wide gaming monitor. There is also a second PC and monitor for the kids. Two people can easily use the desk at the same time.
The desk turns into a bed within seconds, and most of the computer stuff is out of the way and almost out of sight.
For a desk and a bed it is very expensive, but it has created an 'extra' room in our house as our office was too small to fit in a desk and a bed.

Just so I'm clear:
You moved away from your daughter for his work, to be near an office he doesn't intend to go to.
He wants to buy a stupid big desk with a treadmill to get some exercise. When he could walk to his office.
You never get to choose anything for your home.
Your daughter will not have the spare room you bargained on.
What are his good points?#

How often does she visit? If a few times a year would he agree to move or dismantle desk on those days?

I have to say I agree with this. Realistically how often will daughter stay & his long for? Definitely not enough for someone living & contributing to the house to give up a proper workspace. As someone who works partially from home his desk dies seem very cramped & the new one should be a long term investment.

alot if people don’t have guest bedroom & guests either sleep on airbed/ couch etc or seat nearby. Daughter will likely stay less & less as she gets older anyway that’s pretty normal.

id get him to face more of a shop around though as you can get some of those style desks slot cheaper now. Even get him to look at FB marketplace as some absolute bargains to be had. Find a compromise on the cost