Dog on Guest Bed - WWYD?

[PoochProblem]

I have a dilemma in that a very dear long-term friend (who lives about 1.5 hours away) acquired a large dog during lockdown who sleeps in the same bed as him and won't tolerate being in a dog bed overnight.

My friend recognises that not everyone is comfortable with dogs in beds and, without asking, volunteers to sleep downstairs on an airbed with the pooch when he visits. But I don't think he gets a very good night's sleep, and that's putting him off coming to stay that often.

Whilst I'm pretty dog-friendly and like this dog a lot, he's pretty big, sheds hair, dribbles and - to be blunt - can have a strong odour. Also the guest bedroom is often used by my student son when he is back from uni, and he's not comfortable with the pooch sleeping in there. And of course, other people use the guest room occasionally.

I'd be more than happy if my friend's dog were to sleep in a basket in the bedroom of course. But my friend is a bit of a soft touch and gave into him coming into the bed.

Friend and I are unlikely to fall out about this - he's pretty easy going and we've been mates since student days (we're in our 50s). But he has been a very good friend over over the years, supporting me through a tough time recently, so I feel a bit conflicted about whether I should accommodate letting his dog sleep in the bed. The mattress is new if that makes any difference.

Any practical suggestions welcomed. Dog lovers, please be kind.

Have name changed because details may out me, but long term user (please don't make me say penis beaker or yoni massage).

YABU = suck it up and stop being precious. You should accommodate your friend's preferences.
YANBU = dogs belong in dog beds (when houseguests)

I'd be suggesting he come for the day only. And find daycare for his dog.

I would get a waterproof mattress protector , a cheap duvet and duvet cover set, and let your friend have the room - sounds like he is a really good friend and you enjoy his time with you.
Unless the backstory is that your son has allergies, he won’t notice.

You could always ask him to bring his own bedding then put a waterproof mattress protector on the bed to stop any dribbles.

that seems to me like the best option. He can have the dog in bed, but once all bedding changed there shouldn’t be any lasting sign it was there

Of course they are. No sane non-pet owner would actually be happy with sleeping in a bed a dog had previously slept in.

When we go away, we take a superking sized flat sheet that goes over the whole bed. Our dog only comes up on bed for about 30 minutes, then he sleeps on the floor. Personally if it’s your son’s bed and he doesn’t want the dog sleeping in there, then I wouldn’t have the dog in the room.

I'd hate to turn up to a room that smelled of dog if I was a houseguest. People with dogs rarely appreciate how smelly their dog is or how long the smell lingers.

No mattress topper would convince me to sleep in a bed had slept in, grim.

Dogs shouldn’t be houseguests in the first place.

needing to provide a bed is just ridiculous.

Mattress protector and he brings his own duvet & pillows.

If you are happy for the dog to be in the room, and even on the air bed with duvet on, then a mattress protector and him bringing his own stuff will be fine.

I think it's pretty cheeky of you to be trying to find solutions for your friend when your son (who sleeps in the bed regularly) has made it clear that he's not happy about the dog being there.

Our (little) dog sleeps in our bed and, if she's in the same room as us, it's unavoidable I'm afraid. I would absolutely go with what our host is comfortable with though. If we put a dog bed in the kitchen, she'd be fine. But if your friend's dog would get distressed by that sort of arrangement, that's going to be stressful for your friend.

My son likes the dog a lot and I know he would be happy to consider reasonable solutions. I would never force anything on him.

Is it a single bed? If so, I would change the whole mattress. Keep a less special, cheap one in the garage and bring it out for when your friends stays.

Buy a better airbed or one of those metal folding beds which are surprisingly comfortable. But no, don’t let the dog in your son’s bedroom. I’m an animal-lover and dog-owner but I never have dogs on my bed.

But you've said he's not comfortable with the dog sleeping in there.

So what solution is there?

My friend's dog wouldn't be happy being parted overnight.

It's a king size

And I don't have a garage

Could you ask your friend to bring his own bedding when he visits?

Maybe I should have said he's not comfortable with the dog sleeping in the bed in its current set up.

It's a possibility but he would still drool and possibly got through the mattress protector unless I get a waterproof one. Also, waterproof protectors are pretty unpleasant to sleep on imo.

I have a fleet of dogs. Big ‘uns. The odd little one. Not one of them comes upstairs, let alone sleeps in the bed. Letting them do so is asking for trouble.

Anyway, even as a dog lover, I wouldn’t dream of letting a guest have their dog in one of my beds. My nightmare FIL let his appallingly-‘trained’ dog into the guest bed, and didn’t clean up when she pissed all over the sofa in the bedroom and the en-suite. Which pretty much cemented my rule.

He's happy to sleep on an airbed that's fine.

Also teh bedding will be washed and floor hoovered so Iy wouldn't really bother me I'd a guest has him in his bed. But this is your house and you do whenever you are comfortable with

This . Tell your friend to give him a bath before he arrives if he smells .

Well, unless your friend brings his own mattress and bedding, I don't really think there's a solution, and I'm very much pro dogs in beds - but only when everyone is happy with it, and in this case, they're not.

I also don't think it's fair on any of your other guests to unwittingly sleep on the same bed as a dog - what if someone was allergic or asthmatic, for example?

If your friend insists on bringing the dog and staying over, then the dog stays downstairs and the friend just has to go without sleep. If he wants to stay in the bed, his dog can go into kennels or to a home boarder.

It's not just the smell - it's the hair shedding and the drool