Family holiday. How should the costs be split?

[Sallyrush]

3 families looking to hire a Villa. (Siblings. Not sure if relevant or not)
2 families are 2 adults and 2 kids, other family is 1 adult, 2 kids.
Families 1 & 2 (2 adults, 2 kids each) think Villa should be split per family.
Family 3 (1 adult, 2 kids) thinks the cost should be split per person, their reason being they have 1 salary to pay for the holiday, other families have 2 - all adults work full time.
Families 1 & 2 feel they all use same facilities so it’s per family.
Family 3 would also like to split costs like food per person but other families think this is petty.
who is right?
YANBU. Families 1 & 2 are correct. Split per family
YABU Family 3 is correct. Cost split per person

My issue with the single patent theory, is that many receive benefits so can actually work out better off than a couple both on minimum wage that are just over the benefits threshold so it can be a red herring as to income. Personally I'd never go on this type of holiday ever again after having this exact argument with my DH family a few years ago, but the accomodation should be split 3 ways and the food either per person or each family buys their own

Really sorry to hear this OP, so disappointing for you for your family to be like this. I'm with you. We go on breaks with 3 other families. One is a single parent so we always split costs by adult. They always offer to split cost per family but it doesn't feel morally right to do that to my friend.

I wasn’t talking about the food just accommodation & nobody can assume what the other will do, she is using same number of rooms & shared living space as far as she knows right now. The op is complaining about a few quid plus says she can afford it anyway. I have an issue with people who want the same value for less than other people pay just because they feel entitled to as they earn less (typically single parents when with couples)

Accomodation is charged per room ( and less if the room is not en suite)
Food is per person.

Accommodation split in 3.
Food/drinks split per person

Tbf I would question the full holiday if I was the single parent in this situation and the two siblings were insisting on a different split. I can't imagine on insisting the single person to pay 1/3 of food cost of 6 adults.

Holiday is meant to be fun, not arguments about money and trying to get someone to cover more costs than they should

Oh and I think food is different from villa costs. OP should definitely be paying proportionally less as no adult male who tend to drink and eat the most.

We have always done per person split (including children), then a kitty for food and drink. Family has changed over time with kids growing up, teenagers bringing mates, people separating then getting back together, people having babies etc and per person has seen us through.

Actually the majority think I’m in the right but I posted this to get different POV.
I think I’m going to just pay 1/3 to keep the peace but I won’t be going away with them again. My sister especially has really disappointed and upset me as I would never expect her to pay the same if it was the other way round, and her comments are mean.

Cost spilt by room. And then food split by person

The majority as in both your siblings not MN!

This - and this is your reply. Why is the single person effectively contributing for themselves and their kids and then towards the other family.

What is the price difference spliting per person rather than per family?

Personally, if I could afford it, I would pay per family as I hate arguing but I would request that food is split per person (including children).

Plus I think the bigger villa is the best option, as gives more personal space for everyone going. Then you're not on a top of each other.

The problem with splitting things per family is it doesn't stop at the accommodation, you have to take into consideration food, days out etc, family 3 will end up very much out of pocket by the end of the break, whilst 1 and 2 are quids in

In these circumstances it should be split per person. Given their shitty attitude I I would not go on holiday with them.

If you won’t go away with them again, don’t give them the satisfaction of going away with them this time.

Do something fun with your kids.

Given the sister has form for taking the extra room for kids, it’s likely she will do it again.

And now I see why you don’t socialise with single parents, you probably expect them to split the bill per family, therefore subsidising you and your husband.

Well is guess in theory the single adult has a double use of a room so more than the other adults 😂. Although, that aside if it were my sibling I would cover it if they were struggling. Did they ask in a demanding way, is that why the others are not willing? 🤔

I have had this problem before where my sibling earned so much more and insisted I pay my paid my full share even though I was single.
A single person's wages are comparably way more than a couples due to couples having two sets of tax allowance and also having double the income to pay bills (aside from food, most bills are not doubled when there is more than one adult). Therefore a couple's income can be a lot higher than a single person even when their actual income seems similar. A single person needs to earn quite a lot more to have a comparable income to a couple.

I'm sorry your family are crappie in this regard OP. How are they otherwise?

I have done this recently but with no kids involved however given that kids won't be paying I would adopt the same principle.

5 adults went - 2 couples and 1 single person. We divided the cost of the accommodation by 5 and each adult paid an equal share. Same with the food - divided by 5 and paid equal shares.

I would probably divide the accommodation the same way we did - and work out cost per adult. With food maybe do the same but maybe include the kids in the count if someone has less kids - although obviously adults will pay for them.

That’s what the op is claiming as a defence for her entitlement, doesn’t know that will happen.
I don’t socialise with single parents because we have a different lifestyle & on the few occasions we did they are always pleading poverty & I could never understand why they would accept invites to functions they couldn’t afford to go to & then moan about the fact they were there in first place.

I think either per person or per adult. There are more rooms than needed so you can’t split by rooms plus the larger families will take up more space in the communal rooms.

Single parent could well be "rich divorced dad" who in no way is struggling.

If they force you to pay a third demand first dibs on the room for yourself, theres always a master bedroom and one of the couple will be expecting that they get that. X

How on earth does Families 1 & 2 think splitting per adult “isn’t fair”? What isn’t fair is one person subsidising 2 two adult families.