To ask DH to try on outfits before trip

[BreadsNRoses]

DH and I are going on a two-week trip around different places in Japan and are each taking only one carryon bag. So every outfit needs to be chosen wisely. I asked him to try on outfits before the trip to see what would be best to pack and if we needed to buy him anything else (like no-show socks, another t-shirt, etc). He thought it was unreasonable to do a “fashion show” trying on each outfit before packing to see what works and what we needed to buy. Am I being unreasonable?

He brought up the idea of putting this to a vote. If you vote YABU, he never needs to try on outfits before a trip again. If you vote YANBU, he should check his outfits before trips.

YABU
I always try on outfits before I go but you can't make your DH do this if he doesn't want to.
If he gets there and has an issue with his outfits that exactly what it is, his issue for him to deal with

YABU, assuming he knows what clothes fit him and if that's likely to have changed.

Yes you're right in that his outfits might not work. But it's also nothing to do with you. If his outfits are shit, he bas to put up with it or buy more. It doesnt affect you

He’s a grown adult. If it’s wrong when you’re away it’s his own bloody fault 🤷🏼‍♀️

I don't think he needs to try on, but given your luggage constraints it's worth him thinking and planning what to take. Ensure everything he takes goes with two or three things. Can items work day or evening? E.g. DH would ensure for each pair of shorts, he had two daytime t-shirts and at least one evening shirt/top (for hot country holiday). What shoes work well with multiple outfits? Any gaps that need filling? When you're packing light, you need to make everything you take work hard for you. Though, in fairness, that's much easier for men than women!

I can understand why you want him to try them on and make a plan however he is a grown up. Let him make his own mistakes. Tell him he can't complain about his choice, nor can he waste both your time shopping for those things he got wrong/forgot. Drop the rope, and enjoy your holiday!

Btw OPs DH....just try them on. You can't suck that tummy in all day 😉

Yabu to only take carry on bags for 2 weeks

I’ve never tried on outfits before a holiday before in my life. Surely you can tell if you need another T-shirt by counting the number he has and working out how often you’ll be able to do washing and checking there aren’t fewer than the days without any laundry facilities? Same with making sure he has enough socks, pants etc. can’t see why there’s a need to try anything on (I suppose unless his weight has significantly changed since he last wore some of the items).

I don’t think he needs to try on ‘outfits’ to ‘see what works’ to pack for a holiday. It’s going to pretty obvious without trying things on whether he’s got enough stuff.

No he definitely doesn’t need to try them on. Maybe lay everything out on the bed so he can check he has all the right items, but why would he need to put them on for you? Unless there is a history of very bad packing causing significant issues it seems a bit controlling. You can of course pack however you feel works best for you.

I vote he’s a grown ass man that can sort it out himself. (Which sounds like agrees with)

Taking inspiration from this thread I’m going to put my uniform in tonight to check I’ll be ok for work tomorrow

your going to Japan not the jungle any problems I’m sure you’ll be able buy clothes over there

I can highly recommend the luggage transfer service, an absolute godsend. Your hotels can book it for you.
If you are going in the next week or two be prepared for HOT, I would say deodorant and fans are your primary prirorities (top tip, don't rely on Japanese deodorant, for come reason it doesn't work on westerners - I kid you not)

if we needed to buy him anything else (like no-show socks, another t-shirt, etc)
What are "no-show socks"? Like trainer socks? Surely he can count how many pairs he owns without needing to try them on. Ditto t-shirts. What does trying them on accomplish? Are they tops he hasn't worn in months or something? I don't get it.

Some men buy too much clothing and shoes and some would rather walk around in literal rags than go shopping. My DH is more in the latter category, which is totally fine. I’ll buy him things he needs online (new pair of shoes for work when the old ones start to look ratty, etc) so he doesn’t have to go to the store. Anyone else have a DH like this? I appreciate his frugality, but also like him to look smart. I wanted him to try things on before the trip (and not just pack everything the night before) in case it turns out we need to buy him something new before leaving.

Leave him to it, you're not his mum.

Mens clothes are jeans/ shorts and t-shirts/ jumpers. It all matches.

On the basis that I would trust my 13 year old to pack his own bags I think you can trust your husband to put some clothes in a suitcase which fit him. If you particularly want to buy him some more clothes then go for it if you know his style but otherwise I would leave him to it.

You sound like his mother not his wife.

What is up woth the voting?

Can't believe there are so many women dating or married to men that they don't even trust to dress themselves 🤔

Wow just leave him to it and stop buying his clothes for him. Fine to let him know when things are getting a little worn or whatever, but actually buying it for him - DS stopped letting me him anything if he couldn't pick it about age 13.

Plus if you're so intimately acquainted with his wardrobe, why don't you just do his packing?

On a non related note DH and I do most of our clothes shopping at the airport shops or on holiday as that's when we feel relaxed enough to bother.

I appreciate his frugality, but also like him to look smart. I wanted him to try things on before the trip (and not just pack everything the night before) in case it turns out we need to buy him something new before leaving.
If you're worried about his clothes looking tatty then surely they look tatty anyway, he doesn't need to try them on to see that. And if he doesn't see the need for/want new clothes what's it to you?

You are treating him like a DC, I can't believe you shop for him .. so what if his shoes are falling apart ... let him do his own packing, do you really care if he has 'no show socks' or whatever , concentrate on visiting Japan, not what your DH wears. Why is it important to you that he looks smart? Do you think his appearance reflects on you?
I would not be impressed if my DH wanted me to look 'smart' or 'pretty' ... he takes me as I am.

He's a grown man. He knows how much space he has. He knows how many days he needs clothes for. He can figure it out for himself. I'm not sure what kind of outfits your DH has but mine just puts any top with any bottoms and, hey presto - outfit!

Yes, thank you. I think it should be fine if we do a load of laundry at one point.