Self-catering holiday: an oxymoron

[RumAndReisling]

Whose idea was the self-catering holiday?

I am ‘fortunate’ to have access to a holiday cottage. We go every year.

But… there are no restaurants. So I have to produce three meals a day - more, as I have young children. Snacks.

If I don’t produce the meals, no one else will. Sandwiches for every meal.

Sometimes I go on strike and will refuse.
But then… I’ll go to make a piece of toast and DH will appear ‘oh I’d love a sandwich too’.

The entire holiday then revolves around planning, shopping, food preparation and washing up. Or I’m pissed off because I’m hungry but if I try to feed myself I’ll end up
having to produce food for others. Every morning starts with having to tidy the house and kitchen - normally a weekend-only activity.

The most irritating part of this is that I work full time - so normally I am at most responsible for one meal a day.

I cannot be the only person who feels this way. I want to eat three meals a day in restaurants and pay someone else to wash up.

I would just stay at home. That's not a holiday at at all.
To be honest, even if I had a supportive partner, self-catering still wouldn't be my bag.
Hotels all the way.

@Hbh17 I can’t change the location, the house is owned by the family.

We do not go somewhere self-catering for our other holidays - for precisely this reason.

I agree with the posters that say the layout of self-catering is better - likely to have a living room etc be all being in a hotel room.

I just don’t want to do domestic chores on holiday and that seems an integral part of self-catering, no matter how easy you make it for yourself.

I get where you are coming from and our last holiday definitely felt like that!
Usually we find the balance on self catering of having lunches out, DH finding a local bakery for breakfast and then cooking simple meals for dinner. I do like the flexibility that self catering gives us in terms of locations. With small children though we are likely to do half board package deals for a while as found I get zero break otherwise!

Get you op.. holiday for everyone else... sane old shit for you just different location.
I can't believe there are no cafes or restaurants withon an easy drive.
You just need to say
" kitchen closed.. my holiday too"
and book a table.
Or incorporate the big meal of day with activity trip. Buy ready made meals in supermarket and to make a point the buy crap supermarket sandwiches too. Dh needs to step up because at moment he's gone on holiday with the dc and their chef

I came in to say YABU - we go to a villa in Mallorca every year and it's very relaxing - DH sorts breakfast, we eat out for either lunch or dinner, and whichever one we don't is just grazing stuff - crisps, bread, olives, charcuterie etc.

But if you don't have restaurants nearby and your DH isn't pulling his weight, then I completely get that it's just same shit, different location!

I think you're exaggerating a bit, bunging ready prepared food from m&s or Charlie Bigham into the oven literally takes less than a minute. Take paper plates if you don't want to wash up. Wiping a kitchen surface takes seconds. Cereal, milk or today for breakfast everyone helps themselves and wipes up after themselves. Surely you're out some of the days and can eat out, or do you literally just go and stay in the property and no go anywhere, that doesn't sound like a holiday to me.

This is a freebie holiday if the compromise is you clear up after yourself that seems a good deal to me. Or send DH and the DC and don't go if you hate it that much.

Your husband is a lazy arsehole.

1. Your husband is a lazy arsehole
2. You sound like a martyr

“you won't get scurvy eating shite for a week.” @TheTurn0fTheScrew I need this on a t-shirt 😁

Op are you still not aware that you can change this?

I agree, self-catering is not a holiday - not unless you have a dishwasher, restaurants/cafes nearby, places that deliver etc.

I might continue to go annually, if it's somewhere he/rest of family really loves, on 2 conditions
1 - he does half the chores (& kids should help too)
2 - the money saved by doing this for one holiday gives you the right to choose the next one!

Why can't you do easy breakfast where everyone sorts and cleans up after themselves (toast, cereal) and easy shite the rest of the time with paper plates if necessary?

If your DH loves it, send him on his own with the kids. You can stay at home and eat out for a week.

I don't mind self catering, but with a dishwasher and eating out regularly. But I couldn't go to the same place over and over again.

You have a number of options

go somewhere else where there are restaurants

Go to the same place, do a large shop, including ready meals, agree with your husband who does which meals and that he is responsible for snacks, direct the kids to him

dont go self catering

This!!!

self-catering is not house arrest.
I much preferred self-catering to hotels when we had young children, it was making our lives so much easier and our holidays so much more relaxing. It never meant we had to spend the day washing up.

The OP is just unlucky to be stuck in a terrible set up.

I'm with you, OP. My DH and I had it out years ago after yet another self-catering holiday with his family. I told him meal planning, cooking and cleaning wasn't a holiday and we were going to start going on proper holidays. And so we did.

Say to DH that you want to take turn about on holiday choices. I mean even a holiday cottage within walking distance of restaurants would be a big improvement on what you have today. We used to go self catering a lot when DS was younger for the extra space, but rarely cook meals apart from eggs at breakfast as we would go out or get takeout.

Or tell him he's on cooking duty for the next break.

Yeah, this.

While self-catering isn't an oxymoron, this particular self catering holiday sounds absolutely shit. Most of us would refuse to tolerate it, and there are ways to make it better. If OP wants to put up with it rather than do any of those things, fine. Wouldn't be my choice but up to her.

Yep, it’s complete rubbish. But if I say I want to go to an all inclusive or hotel (etc) husband says it’s too expensive. Drives me mad. I’m American and I actually would rather go stay with my parents for 2 weeks even though my husband doesn’t like that, because there are a zillion takeaway options in the US and my mom loves cooking for an audience

Well yeah, you're going to be doing some chores on a self catering holiday. Or on this self catering holiday at least. If you don't want to do anything at all, it's never going to suit you. So the question is just whether you want to try and minimise that amount or not.

I love a self catering holiday but I would never ever book one without a dishwasher. Then we eat out and cater at home but everything goes in the dishwasher.
Can you pay for one to be installed? This would make a massive difference.

It does sound like a shit holiday. What do you do for the 7 days that you are there? Just stay at the cottage if there is nothing at all near by? Sounds awful.

We tend to eat bugger meals at dinner time then for tea easier buys put together like salads we don't cook full on meals buy having things like chopping boards plates etc. helps and for breakfast

Bigger!!!!, bits and but to correct the spelling errors

😂