School mum claiming her child has 'inherited' her binge eating disorder

[Geraniumgal]

My daughters class had an end of term tea party yesterday. Typical kids party foods were shared out. However one child was literally grabbing and eating every biscuit she could get her hands on.
This went on for over 20mins and I'm sorry to say it was upsetting to watch. The little girl is 7 and already clearly overweight.

Her Mum arrived to collect her and myself and a few parents mentioned her daughter had only really eaten the biscuits and cake so she knew she hadn't eaten a proper tea.
Mum just laughed it off basically claiming she seems to have inherited her own binge eating.

The child is 7! Is this in any way normal?

what was said between the other mums?

The adults could, and should, have intervened. A light comment along the lines of 'that's enough biscuits at this end of the table! Let's let the children at the other end have some!' and physically moving the plate.

A pp asked if the same would be said of a skinny child - at one of my DC's birthday parties a few years ago we had a similar situation. It was one of the first 'drop-off' parties and the child was from a household which eats very healthily with strict rules about snacking. The child went absolutely nuts at the sight of party food and was literally cramming it into her mouth. I had to stop her so that she didn't choke or vomit. I later caught her trying to pull a chunk off the half-cut birthday cake. Sometimes it's learned behaviour (and I think it probably is in OP's scenario) but some children are incredibly greedy around sugar.

I wouldn't have mentioned it. Not your circus, not your clowns. 😗

That poor mum is likely at home now replaying this moment in her head - an issue she's already aware of and likely already worrying about

I realise this isn't the point of your thread, but genetic factors, as well as the environment, do contribute to eating disorders. It is nature and nurture, not one or the other.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3599773/

💯- there's nothing helpful, or good natured about your actions or your post. Stop pretending you're concerned, you're embarrassing yourself.

Two other Mums mentioned to the Mum she would only eat biscuits as they had offered sandwiches.
We did NOT have a good old gossip about it. As you will see from my OP

This has been so twisted and now apparently I'm a sad and pathetic person for telling the Mum she hadn't had a proper tea.
OK then.

How is that less harmful in letting mum know that their child hadn't had an actual meal? If the child is overweight I honestly can't see this being a restriction related binge.

You're not OP, people with fat children or who are fat themselves will do a lot of reaching to make out anyone who shows concern for a child as being nasty.

So, all a bit of a non-thing then?

Why did you post your thread, OP?

Because frankly it's none of their business. They have zero clue about what measures the mum is taking regarding hers or childs health. They could be seeing someone about their weight, these mums had no idea. They were just being bitches. I assume if they had a genuine concern about the child being sick they would have bothered their arses to detach themselves from their gossip and took the child off to do something else for a while. Fact is, they weren't bothered, they just loved the faux-concerned gossiping.

Or women in neither position will post their disgust at the faux-concern so evident. Concern? Not for a second.

What exactly did you want to know through posting this?

Jesus Christ. This is fucking ridiculous. So many clearly triggered posters gunning for an OP with their made up scenarios.

I'm concerned that a 7yr old child is being taught by her own mother that she can eat as many biscuits as she wants because she simply has a Binge eating disorder.

Great parenting and I'm glad my child isn't taught over eating like that is normal.
I felt sorry for the child. End of.

This sounds a ducked up scenario.

1. a 7 year old not being able to curtail their own eating habits is fairly normal, I suspect she wasn’t the only one, but you noticed her doing it because you were judging her for being overweight.
2. you and your equally judgemental cabel decided to have a go at the mum to shame her. She made light because she felt under attack and humiliated.

Yes the mother should be teaching her DD better eating habits and limiting unhealthy options. But she might not be able to do this for herself.

But it’s clear that this was nothing to do with your concern, it was everything to do with your need to feel superior. Your attitude (which you are undoubtedly passing onto your own children) is even more damaging and neglectful to your children’s needs as this woman’s eating habits. You behaved appallingly you have nothing to be proud of. It was catty bitchy mob behaviour. I hope someone calls that out in front of your kids.

Well is seems OP doesn't 'know' any better than the rest of us here. She just wants to moan about a kid eating too much sweets (which she provided). She ahould have gone with carrot sticks if she feels this passionately about other people's weight.

Then call social services if you concerned for the child's welfare. .
What is Mumsnet going do do for you?

Why did three separate mums need to feed back this info?

So... not sorry enough to challenge her while she was doing it. But sorry enough to have an anonymous pop about her and her morbidly obese mum, to strangers on the Internet.

shakes head

It’s not good parenting to over-feed your child.

It is not good to tell your child they have binge-eating disorder if that’s not been diagnosed.

So now what? What do you want from this thread, honestly?

Maybe some of us are concerned about your child being shown it’s ok to judge and humiliate other people. Terrible parenting! It a lot harder to change personalities than lose weight.

I understand that but why the post on mumsnet?

Because 'concern'