To be too uneducated for Mumsnet

[est1999]

When I'm on Mumsnet I feel so uneducated.

MN seems to be known for being a bit middle class or maybe that is now a dated assumption

I've made a few threads in the past under a different username and some of the words other Mumsnetters have used I admit I've had to Google the meaning of!

Everyone seems to have a degree or their children are in the process of getting one (if they're old enough)

Most women on here also seem to be very high earners. 50k+

And private schools are a norm for sure.

Maybe that's just my Mumsnet algorithm so to speak lol.

I used to earn between 26-28k per year in a basic admin job. No degree. No A-levels. Now I earn even less after having DC and going part time.

Anyone else feel the same as me at times?

What about my post says 'privilege' to you @Gytgyt? Average income across the UK is £40K so at our max we only earned slightly more than that, and that was briefly. Average income where we live is over £50K and we have never earned that. Genuine question, because statistically speaking, we're not…

No, I'm working class, left home and education aged 15. I live in a very working class and troubled area. I absolutely love reading all the posts from the highly educated and middle class women, I love the wit and humour, I love how Mumsnet has introduced me to topics I had no idea about, especially the feminist board. I've ordered books and checked out websites and social media accounts I never would have otherwise. I'm never going to be more than average intelligence, but I'm so much more well informed now. I think that some of the very witty clever women on Mumsnet are part of the draw for me. I've come to love the straight forward unsentimental communication too. It gives me something I just don't have in my day to day life with my other (working class mum) friends. I also love the mix of different classes on here and how that contributes to some really interesting discussions.

Haha!

Yes, so many posters who are always baffled and have never understood...

It's never quantum physics, either. If I were permanently flummoxed by Christmas Eve boxes or designer handbags, I don't think I'd admit it!

An RN doesn't earn much more than 25k. Not for the work they do anyway. 30k tops for an RN unless you move into management or agency as a B5.

Exactly…. I’ve never known so many people in the one place to be ‘baffled’ by the most normal every day mundane crap! It’s hilarious. Every time I see a post where someone is claiming to be ‘baffled’ it cracks me up now, it really does!

@thing47 well... being mortgage free at 50. That's the thing though you are speaking about your earnings. I wouldn't really assume and I'm not having a dig I am just using your post as a mere example I hope you don't mind. People forget on here support network is key perhaps you had parents gift you a house deposit? Because you had parents do free childcare? There is a much bigger picture...

I'm not saying its the case all I'm saying is like the saying goes..... "Don't watch what anyone has because you don't know how they come by it". It's all relative. I think you will find more people paying a mortgage still at 50 than not statistically speaking.

This is hilarious!

Not something I’ve picked on before but you’re right, there is a lot of that. And I’m almost certain I’m also guilty of it haha.

I'm never going to be more than average intelligence, but I'm so much more well informed now

You write so well and clearly. If you are all example of average intelligence in your neck of the woods, it must be very stimulating to live there.

Yep, my parents are in their 50's and they have a long way to go bless them...

Ah thanks! You are so lovely!

Well posh me

@Greentree1
I think you are missing the point @Yabbadabbadotime is making about older people being less likely to go to university . She is not suggesting that they are in anyway less intelligent or less capable - just that for people leaving school in the 1970s or early 80's it was much less the 'done thing' than it is now (perhaps has been since around 1990s) . You may have been to uni yourself - but it was less common .

@Gytgyt the mortgage free at 50 can simply be because people bought their homes in a cheap area , when housing itself was cheaper overall and never upgraded. Privilege perhaps because of being lucky to enter the housing market when property was cheaper - but also decisions not to over extend financially.

The thing I really get frustrated about is when someone starts posting about a subject that I have a lot of knowledge of and it is clear that they don't. Those posters tend to make things up and I just want to scream that they are lying, but bitter experience tells me that it's best to stay quiet.

In the mid-1990s, 25-year repayment mortgages were quite common. Ours was paid off after, well, 25 years! Because that was kind of the fucking point of the deal.

I guess you could say we were lucky we were able to keep up with mortgage payments, but when money was tight we skimped on other things to ensure we could make them. We had no help with childcare whatsoever, absolutely none. As for help with a house deposit 😂😂😂You only needed a maximum of 5% in those days, and some lenders would accept 3% if you were both in full time work.

It's not privileged to have paid a 25-year mortgage off after 25 years, is it? That's just stupid when it's the entire aim of the product.

Lovely post and well spoken. This is the draw of mn for me as well.

There's nothing wrong with googling words you don't know the meaning of. That's a sign of intellectual curiosity. Not knowing what words mean doesn't correlate with lack of intelligence.

But I find it depressing that so many people on here seem incapable of believing that a woman can earn £50k + It's not an average salary, for sure, but it's not so wildly outside the realms of reality that it should be unbelievable. There are indeed plenty of women who earn £100k +. I work with several. I think if you think anyone who claims to earn a high salary is automatically a bullshitter, with respect you need to get out a bit more.

The fact that it doesn't exist in your immediate world doesn't mean it has to be a lie.

@ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea yes good point.

Not everyone meets someone at 25, not everyone is in a place to get a mortgage and double their income to only 50k as you are putting it. I'm not going to respond to anymore of your comments.... I don't really think I'm the one that's stupid!

Things47 it's actually totally privileged especially in this day and age now. So many young people are at home with their parents, who might or might not want them there. Things are bad love. Really bad, especially in London.

I agree with @Thepeopleversuswork — it’s weird that people automatically disbelieve that other women are high earners. In RL, I never come across women who obsess about housework the way some do on here, but I do believe such people exist, not that these posters are in fact slatterns describing their fantasy cleaning routines!

I don’t think Mn is particularly middle-class, maybe it skews ‘aspirational lower-middle class’ with a good number of working-class and middle-middles, and a sprinkling of upper-middles? But there’s no correlation with intelligence. There are absolutely some well-informed, clever, articulate posters, but there are also posters who appear to glory in their own ignorance. Those threads about ‘things I’ve only just found out now’ are mind-boggling from adults who are literate and have access to the internet.

You are as worthy as anyone. 🙏🏻

Education has very little bearing on intelligence. I say that as someone with postgrad qualifications. Don’t think of yourself as less than and lacking. A formal education is not all its cracked up to be.

I often think the same OP.

@orangeyeahthatsright the thing is I’ve seen it from the other side. My husband being ostracized by my brother and his friends because of him being from London. They would literally turn their backs on my DH if I left the room. Just foul. I have little
to do with my brother now but it seems to be an issue in the area he lives in (which is not the part of the North that we grew up in). My SIL (DH’s sister) lived in a nearby area for a bit and she said that she was subject to abuse because she was from London.

People rarely comment about my accent now but a bit of banter is completely different to actively disliking someone because of their background, which is what my DH experienced.

What I see regularly about the North on here is people advising people to move there because the cost of living is better (e.g. cheaper rent). Completely agree with this. My brother things everyone is rich in the South because we earn more but that is completely untrue. I live in an area with no London or outer London weighting so his salary (as a teacher) would be exactly the same here but he would be paying twice as much for his house so he would be far worse off. He knows this but chooses to ignore it.