To be too uneducated for Mumsnet

[est1999]

When I'm on Mumsnet I feel so uneducated.

MN seems to be known for being a bit middle class or maybe that is now a dated assumption

I've made a few threads in the past under a different username and some of the words other Mumsnetters have used I admit I've had to Google the meaning of!

Everyone seems to have a degree or their children are in the process of getting one (if they're old enough)

Most women on here also seem to be very high earners. 50k+

And private schools are a norm for sure.

Maybe that's just my Mumsnet algorithm so to speak lol.

I used to earn between 26-28k per year in a basic admin job. No degree. No A-levels. Now I earn even less after having DC and going part time.

Anyone else feel the same as me at times?

I wouldn't worry, given the low levels of reading comprehension and basic common sense. The level of intelligence here isn't very high despite whatever fantasy people choose to construct about themselves

The people I know on mumsnet are definitely in that bracket.

All I see is people panicking that they can’t afford to eat, living in tiny flats with multiple kids, going camping in the rain because they can’t afford to go abroad.

On the other side of the scale there are people claiming to be on over £100k a year, multiple kids in private school wondering whether skiing in the French alps would be more appealing to the kids than Florida.

You don’t hear much from the folk inbetween but I’m betting there are more of them that the two extremes

Yes. And I think it would be unfair not to acknowledge the hard work you have done to achieve mortgage free status. Well done.

I would agree.

@Womensrightsaretheanswer writes very well indeed.

I think I'm making assumptions based on life stage. I'm 54 and a grandmother with children in their late 20s/30s. Most of the posters seem to have children in school. There are multiple posters with issues with MiL and grandparent childcare, and I am a MiL and GP who does childcare. Lots of comments and judgement about 'older women' when I consider at 54 I am an older woman. Clearly just another way in which I don't fit the MN norm!

Well we are all drawn to threads that interesy us I suppose
But the one thing I have noticed is the overwhelming SN/disability. Everyone seems to have kids with SN or have depression/anxiety/ whatever
Every problem will have someone jumping in to justify with one of the above.

You sound intelligent and inquisitive to me. Formal education is only a small part of the picture. You may be underestimating yourself.

You are aware, right, that there is a scale of incomes in this country ranging from low to high?

There are indeed lots of people on low incomes, particularly at the moment. But its interesting that you say people are "claiming" to be on over £100k a year. Are you saying that you think people come on here and make it up just for shits and giggles?

I have seen this a lot on this thread (and other threads). Why do people assume that anyone saying they are on £100k plus is automatically lying? If this was a board that skewed male would they also assume that these people are lying?

It may be that some of these people are lying but I think quite a lot of this comes down to internalised misogyny: people struggle to believe that women earn high salaries because they personally don't. But it doesn't really make sense if you think this through: what on earth is to gain from doubling your salary on an anonymous talk board? No one knows who you are!

It bothers me that people find it impossible to believe there are highly-paid women - it's a pretty shit signal to send to your kids that you don't believe a woman can earn over £100k pa. In this day and age it shouldn't be totally impossible to believe. It's going to be an anomaly, yes, but it's not completely beyond belief.

Look forward to meeting you at the next Gathering of the Alumni 😂

@Greentree1
@Yabbadabbadotime is right though. Fewer women went to Uni in the 1970s. I was one of very few in my school year of working class girls to do so. I also noticed that my working class school friends got married younger and had kids while the mc women I went to Uni with established careers first. Now most people go to Uni and many of them have 1st class degrees which when I went to Uni were only awarded to geniuses.

I have a couple of degrees and have had a wonderful career although I mostly. Struggled financially. I find that money begets money and that people who are loaded are usually born that way and acquire more through inheritance.

I always feel uneducated too because, while I excelled in my chosen subject area, my school wasn’t the best so although I have degrees my basic education is lacking in some areas as I have had to work so hard throughout my life that I have never found the time to catch up. However I don’t feel uneducated on MN. I like intelligent threads and posts but find that sadly MN often succumbs to the same reductive name calling and senseless pile-ons as other sm platforms.

I'm really quite surprised just how many MNers don't believe there are many, many people earning high salaries.

I wonder if they prefer to scoff at the idea, and ridicule people who say they do earn well because they don't want to believe they are lagging behind in terms of their own earnings?

The chart below is directly from the ONS. You can easily find the full report online and it includes detailed analysis of incomes (PAYE) with very regular updates.

If you look at the 95th percentile it shows 5% of people on PAYE earn over £85k

There are over 30m people in the full cohort so that's at least 1.5m people. And note that this is only PAYE; it doesn't include the many, many others who are not in PAYE.

Extrapolate the stats across the number of MN users - there are millions - and, even assuming they are completely 'average', it's clear there will be a lot of people on here who have high incomes.

(https://www.ons.gov.uk/employmentandlabourmarket/peopleinwork/earningsandworkinghours/bulletins/earningsandemploymentfrompayasyouearnrealtimeinformationuk/june2023)

See also the posters who insist that everyone who says they have a nanny, spends five grand on a holiday, buys frocks/shoes for one hundred and fifty quid, is making it up/not living in the real world.

The existence of multiple nanny agencies, Mark Warner, Hobbs, Reiss etc show that this is a significant sector of the UK public - and the older section of the MN demographic are much more insulated from housing costs than the under 35s.

Indeed at 35 my finances were very different to how they are now.

I’m also a company owner and wouldn’t even feature in the PAYE data of high earners. My profits after corporation tax are over £100k and there are lots of people in that situation - see the changes in tax rules in response

I think unless the thread is specifically related to earnings eg 'What do you do, and how much do you earn?' your salary is generally one of the least interesting things you can share.
I'm interested in people's opinions on the topic discussed, the arguments they make to support them, anecdotes where relevant. Telling me you earn six figures (more often than not without context, what you do, your journey to achieve it, what that means in real terms for your life and so on) doesn't really add much for me.

I neither believe or disbelieve people, how would I know? But unless relevant to the thread I tend to do a little eye roll at the need to shoe horn it in.
Do I wish I earned 6 figures? Of course. It would be a life changing salary for me with my tiny outgoings, but I've neither the ability to achieve this on merit or the drive to elevate my mediocrity to the required value. I enjoy the job I have in a poorly paid sector and doubt I'd cope with the requirements of a Big Job, but I don't consider myself lesser for that. There are only so many Big Jobs to go round and someone has to do the smaller ones.

I always struggle with people who "work hard" ( as if no one else does ) to get their 6 figure salary ( whilst denying being very well off, being unable to read and understand statuses ) and then "struggle" ( without admitting that their mortgage and school choices were choices)

I suspect someone managing to raise a family on 30k has a lot more brain and sense

Op I have several degrees and still need to google words sometimes - the fact that you bother to look them up says something very positive about you

Statues are actually statistics

@5128gap I think that's why you see high earners doing it - because they just want to brag. People on average incomes don't mention it unless necessary because it's just not relevant.

I couldn't agree more @5128gap with regard to salaries' irrelevance in the vast majority of threads. I too give a metaphorical eye roll to the pointless shoehorning of pay figures into random posts.

I wouldn’t think the majority of MNers are highly educated, no.

I say this at least partly because of the numbers of basic SPAG (spelling and grammar) errors, which I don’t for a moment believe can be all down to dyslexia.

I might add that plenty of well educated parents in ‘good’ jobs don’t send their children to private schools, at least partly because fees are relatively a lot less affordable than they were a generation or so ago, and certainly since house prices have zoomed into the stratosphere.

I'm surprised that so many people people are surprised that some people are high earners. Why wouldn't they be? It's as if some people on here think, "well I don't know anyone like that, therefore they MUST be lying." What is the point of 'lying' about an income on an anonymous forum? You might as well be lying to the cat or the birds in the garden!

it's too often a race to the bottom on here. There is no 'normal.' It's the internet!

Its actually very boring to read endless threads about 'DH won't do laundry,' 'How do I travel to London- oooh?' 'How do I possibly cater for a VEGAN at a barbecue?' 'Oh my god, some women are... SAHMs!!!!!' 'How can I possibly stand at the school gates for 3 minutes?' Just really basic everyday things presented as a huge deal.

@AllyCart I don't think I've ever seen salary randomly shoe horned unnecessarily into a thread unless it was the topic of the thread or it was in some way relevant eg I want to reduce my hours, I earn X amount?

@Gytgyt
That's me! I love a bit of spelling and grammar - but my common sense is so sadly lacking, I'd swap them😁 any day

I never said they were lying, I said they were “claiming”. I say that because on here you should take everything with a pinch of salt. Including the people saying they live on £3 a week and that is to cover their rent and food etc

Of course some people are telling the truth.

Not everyone meets someone at 25, not everyone is in a place to get a mortgage
Sure but that's luck, not privilege. 'Privilege' and 'luck' are not synonymous. I wouldn't object to being called 'lucky'! Perhaps you've just used the wrong word, @Gytgyt ? That would be ironic on this thread.

it's actually totally privileged especially in this day and age now. So many young people are at home with their parents, who might or might not want them there. Things are bad love. Really bad, especially in London

Yes, NOW it is, I totally agree with you @Womensrightsaretheanswer (great user name by the way). I wasn't talking about now, though, I was talking about people in their 50s who are nearer the end of their financial journey than the beginning. FWIW I live near London too, and have 2 of my 3 twentysomething kids currently living with me. As it happens, I love having them here, though I fully appreciate not everyone feels the same. None of that makes me 'privileged', however.