To be too uneducated for Mumsnet

[est1999]

When I'm on Mumsnet I feel so uneducated.

MN seems to be known for being a bit middle class or maybe that is now a dated assumption

I've made a few threads in the past under a different username and some of the words other Mumsnetters have used I admit I've had to Google the meaning of!

Everyone seems to have a degree or their children are in the process of getting one (if they're old enough)

Most women on here also seem to be very high earners. 50k+

And private schools are a norm for sure.

Maybe that's just my Mumsnet algorithm so to speak lol.

I used to earn between 26-28k per year in a basic admin job. No degree. No A-levels. Now I earn even less after having DC and going part time.

Anyone else feel the same as me at times?

@Yabbadabbadotime the issue with your theory is that the majority of MNers are older women. So it’s not a case of more younger women on the site.

Average age bracket on AIBU for example is 55-60

Thank you. It’s good to share. Never let anyone make you feel uneducated. Google and Dictionary.com are my best friends x

P.S. - I also lived in a refuge for several months whilst doing my GCSE’s due to my parents DV. Re-took one A-Level whilst seven months pregnant in the 90’s ( I was naive/too young and guy was a predator and a lot older - I so wish the internet and MN was around back then!). Not had any family help with any DC and we forked out extortionate London nursery fees for the last two DC. We’re awaiting a possible ASD diagnosis for our youngest DC. I’m practically NC with my Father and he’s never met our youngest DC. I’m now oversharing!
DH and I have friends and acquaintances from all walks of life and some of my work colleagues are my friends.

There's a lot of snobbery and classism on MN, sure, although most of it probably users BS-ing. It's the same deal as every MN user apparently having 'beautiful, athletic' children and a handsome husband. It's all a lot of rubbish.

Is that true? I've always imagined them much younger than that.

My post did come off a bit that way and wasn't intended to. To provide a bit of further context, I did unfortunately encounter quite a few people, both at uni and when I lived in the home counties/worked in London, who did treat me quite sneeringly due to my accent and class background. I'm not being paranoid here, I'm talking about blatant stuff like 'humorous' attempts to mimic my accent and assumptions that I wouldn't have much cultural or intellectual awareness. (Tbf I'm going back to the 80s/90s here, and hopefully society has evolved a little since then.)

Experiences like that, plus comments I read on here pretty frequently about my home town allegedly being 'a shit hole', plus the fact that sometimes people on here actually do express the view that the south is better and that they wouldn't voluntarily spend time in the north, means I am very much aware that the north/south divide still exists and that some people who live further south still think that way. Not the majority, but some. It sounds like you've had better experiences than I did, so perhaps society is evolving in this respect. I hope so.

I actually don't think people are lying generally, what would be the point?
I think Mumsnet attracts intelligent people who like to debate because the forums for debate are fantastic, I have learnt so much on here. It also attracts unsociable miseries too, who don't like people or socialising and spend a lot of time online. You don't get a natural cross section of society on Mumsnet or any other internet forum.

I pay my admin that. Financial services

I find it a bit depressing that everyone assumes the high earners are BS. Lots of people earn high salaries, most of the people in massive houses for a start, why wouldn’t a woman (despite the gender pay gap) be able to earn a lot?

I don't have a degree and am on less that 30k

You can earn 35-40k upwards for some specialised admin jobs in London. Previous experience obviously helps.

Never sure why people assume the high earning posters are all lying. Some maybe. But there are a large number of people out there earning a lot and some of them will be on here.

I am a high earner and I have as much time as I want to do what I want during the day - mainly because I have no manager and I work all the hours so I really don't care if I waste some time on the internet as it won't change the hours I work which are dictated by the commercial deal and time zones.

The thing that annoys me is a thread on what do you earn and lots of posters coming on to say what their husbands earn...

When I was a lower earner I was in customer facing roles where I couldn't have my phone out, or just generally office working with managers around so I'd keep my phone away. Now I'm senior I mostly work from home, I will quite often just flick through my phone when I'm grabbing a drink and switching tasks throughout the day- probably taking no more time than office workers who chat to each other!

Yup, if you request the demographic breakdown from MN (for marketing purposes) they provide the details. Average age across the site is 40, AIBU runs much much older. Average is brought down by the younger groups of women using baby names, pregnancy topics etc.

I don’t think it’s anything to do with not believing women can be high earners. If it is that would be depressing, you’re right. What people must be questioning is the prevalence of high earners on MN. It’s a bit like how on the Style & Beauty board what seems like 90% of posters think they look young for their age. Readers are doubtful not because no woman can ever look younger than her years, but about the fact that nearly every person on S&B thinks they look 10 years younger (it’s often actually 15 or 20 years younger)?! Either there is mass delusion or it’s just easy to exaggerate on an anonymous forum.

It just completely depends where you're from and what your used to. I earn just over 50k, and honestly the norm in my network is to earn a fair bit more and so I feel like a lower earner! I'm not naive, of course there's a huge portion of society on less. But all the pp saying some posters on here are posh wannabes and making stuff up, I don't think it's the case.

Absolutely. OP if you take MN seriously 100% percent and it's having this effect on you its not healthy.

Yeah stating husband’s salary instead of your own really gets on my tits. There was a thread where the OP even made clear that she didn’t want it to turn into one of those threads and still there were about 5 replies on the first page with “DH is an X and earns X”.

Thank you. That's really interesting.

The people calling out high earners for talking bs are probably the ones who are not high earners themselves, so think it is a rarity and anomaly that mn has so many.

Other high earners don't bat an eyelid at such posts.

Surely you don't have to be particularly wealthy to be mortgage-free in your 50s? We paid off our 25-year mortgage 2 years ago when we both turned 50 – never paid any extra or anything, just regular monthly payments over 25 years' duration… For wage context neither of us have ever earned over £45K, and never that at the same time, we live in a 3-bed semi, bit of garden, run 2 cars, go on holiday occasionally, all pretty ordinary, I'd say.

I think this is a good example of what OP is describing. It's not wealth that I focus on. I notice that there are a lot of unaware people on MN and this is what seems to ruffle feathers but I can genuinely see from your post it's the "norm" to you. Perhaps you are not wealthy but privileged.

Half of them are full of shite, there wouldn’t be so many mean replies on here if everyone was happy and living their best lives. Also, every third reply is someone having a performative episode of ‘bafflement’ at a post.. can’t be that bloody intelligent if you’re permanently feckin baffled. Just ignore it, it’s all bs op. Honestly, it really is.

I've seen some posters manage to mention the number of degrees they have into topics where it's not even the slightest bit relevant . I'm never sure whether it's BS or whether they are just really insecure. It certainly doesn't make me feel uneducated or lacking in any way.

@poorbird 🤣🤣 yes and the spelling grammar police

Exactly! If that’s how you choose to spend your day then you can’t be that intelligent! 😂