she should used the shower before i come back

[RobynsMama]

lighthearted, mostly 😂

i’m on holiday with some friends from work, first time we’ve ever been away together but we have done nights away.

I’m sharing a room with one person who doesn’t really like sunbathing or being by the pool. Fair enough we’re all quite chill and have been doing our own thing and then meeting up in the evening for dinner/drinks.

She goes back up to the room usually about 1pm to read and chill out whereas I’ll stay by the pool til it gets too chilly probably about half 6/7. We always make a plan for dinner in the group chat and the. I always put a message saying what time I expect to be back at the room because obviously will have to shower and get ready. Every day this week she’s been in the room for 6/7 hours alone and only gone in the shower when i’ve come back from the pool (it’s like she waits for me to get back then runs in there) and she takes forever meaning I have to then rush. I got fed up of this and asked when she was leaving after lunch if i could use the shower at 6 yesterday and she agreed, but when i got back to the room (at 6) she was in the shower! and took a good 45 minutes for i had to rush again.

aibu to think it’s a bit selfish if you’re in the room all day to wait to use the shower until the person you’re sharing with gets back from the pool, making them rush to get ready?

Yes, you need a sunbathing spot where you can’t be seen from the balcony, take your shower gel out with you and squirt it on you’re flannel before you open the door, straight into the shower. Beat her at her own game. A leisurely shower is just what you need, take your time, don’t rush 😂

I'm which case I think best thing is to pop back to the room at about 5pm. Let her sprint into the shower and go back and sit by the pool till you actually want to shower

Otherwise going up really early is just ruining your poolside time.

That would piss me off. She's being selfish. Did you ask her outright why she did that when she agreed you could have the shower at 6? I would've just asked cause I can't stand that kind of rudeness

Or maybe alternative, don't shower because you don't have time and then sit next to her all evening wafting your armpits in her nose?

Oh god. Someone in my life :-), whenever I announce I'm turning in for the night, darts in to the (only) bathroom ahead of me. By the time I'm finished washing they're in bed snoozing away. The RAGE!

I should add this person has had hours to get ready and go to bed if that's what they wanted to do.

Who takes 45 mins in a shower ! No wonder we have a water shortage.

She is selfish and inconsiderate. Don't share a room with her again.

What a tit she is. You deffo need to sneak back and get in first. Good luck!

that’s so cheeky! i do like a cold shower ur the not having the option to have any hot water at at all would piss me off!

😂😂😂😂 if i could sneak into the room i recon i could get in the shower before her but the bloody door announces my arrival before i’ve even entered the place

When she leaves the pool area say 'seeing as you prefer to have a much longer shower than me, I'm going to nip in first tonight so it's not such a rush for me to get ready. What time are you going to get in? 6? I'll be up at 5:30'

That way, you have been clear about your intentions, you have made the point that her behaviour is making you have to rush, and if she does still get in first she'll show herself to be massively ignorant.

I k know this is light hearted, but it would proper wind me up 🤣

My housemate used to do this. He'd sit on the sofa for hours only to jump into the shower the minute I got back from my run, or start cooking the minute I emerged from my room to cook.

After a while I decided it was that he often lost track of time lounging around scrolling on his phone and my appearance basically jolted him into remembering that he had something to do/ had wasted a lot of time doing nothing while I had been out and about. Annoying, but I genuinely don't think he did it on purpose.

Could it be something similar?

Maddening! I do think it sounds more like obliviousness than deliberately trying to get one over on you but it's very inconsiderate. It must be a nice life being so blissfully unaware of other people's needs and experiences.

And then stay in there until 6.30, see how she likes it lol

My sister does this, and her shit is everywhere, on every surface, just bloody mess, hair grips with hair left on the table, make up wipes, left where used, shoes in the middle of the floor(who takes boots to a hot country?!?)Toothpaste left all around the basin 🤮
She doesn’t clear up because ‘she’s on holiday’ thing is her house is the same!

@RobynsMama
It sounds as though you want your preferences to be controlling and so does she. Neither of you are right of wrong. You might just ask her what time does she want to shower as you will stay in the pool until she is done? That kind of question, puts the onus of establishing a time on het. I don't think that you can have much say as to how long it takes her to shower. You are in a hotel, so it is not as though you are going to run out if hot water

In the future, it might be best to get separate accommodations and settle on a meet-up time for dinner.

45 minute showers are totally unreasonable in any case! How do you get on with her otherwise? Is she oblivious or playing you a silly game of shower showdown?

God what does she do in that room all day? What a boring person! Why on earth is she on this holiday <slightly misses point of thread>.

Text her about 3 in the afternoon. 'What time do you want the shower tonight -I'll fit around you x'.

Honestly I love an afternoon nap on holiday and probably wouldn't surface till 5ish and would then want a shower before going out. So I understand why she maybe can't spend those 7hrs having a shower BUT she should make sure you both have time before you go out.

I'm aghast that anyone is so selfish as to have water running for 45 minutes.

I do a lot of at home spa treatments. You perform the treatments and THEN quickly rinse.

She was being thoughtless, not allowing you time to shower although she knew your movements.

She is now being selfish - it seems deliberately so as she is breaking a verbal agreement with you not to be in the shower at 6pm.

Can you discuss this with her, ideally at dinner in front of others to out her as a selfish cow?

If she showers at say 5 she's not going to get dirty sitting in an air conditioned room until dinner.

Get one of the people to text her for something,when she comes down.
You run up to shower🤣.

There is a drought pretty much everywhere in Europe.

People talking 45min long showers are utter twats.