To really, really not want to do this.

[Nootherwayout]

I’ve used a throwaway username for this because anyone from my village would instantly recognise me 😂.

DH (and I but to a lesser extent) volunteer at our local village hall. DH is slightly obsessed with it and puts in hours and hours of volunteering most weeks. He does a lot of the organising for the Friday night social nights.

Tomorrow is the monthly bingo night and DH has not found anyone to call it this month. He has basically railroaded me into doing it, ie if I don’t do it, it can’t go ahead. He can’t because he’s the only volunteer available to run the rest of the night and no one else from the committee or village has agreed to do it.

But I don’t want to for the following reasons:

I hate bingo, I really, actually hate it! I never go to the bingo nights or if I do I sit outside with other friends that don’t play.
I don’t know the weird rhymes you’re meant to call out for certain numbers so I will have to try to learn them tomorrow.
People get really annoyed and complain when they’re not happy about the speed the numbers are called etc and I don’t want to be complained about when I’m doing something for free.
I’m 6 months in to a busy public sector job that I’m still learning and I’m knackered by Friday nights.
I’m happy to do my bit and have planned and read out the quiz on quiz night 3 times so I am confident getting up in public but I said to DH right at the beginning that I do not want to call bingo.
I know full well that next month we’ll be in the same position and I’ll be expected to do it again.
My friends will be sat outside in the sunshine and I won’t be able to sit with them.
I’ll have to fake enthusiasm or it’s not fair on the people who’ve paid to play.
Did I mention, I hate bingo?

AIBU to just really, really not want to do it and if so any tips for faking enthusiasm?

I am intrigued! 😂Do tell us more…

No good deed goes unpunished OP!

Let them turn up.

”Unfortunately, ladies and gentlemen, no one has volunteered to be the caller for tonight, so we’re going to have to take turns.
Who will call the first game? You, sir, over on the right, will you be our first caller?”

Not your problem, not DH’s problem if the lazy gits won’t volunteer ahead of time.

Pretend you're pished and do it so badly they will put a stop to it and someone else will step in.

Please do it and use the interactive rude bingo calls...

It’s a no from me. The people who enjoy playing bingo need to take a turn instead of leaving it to the one/two person band of you and your husband. Simple.

Yup.

People don't step forward unless there is a space for them to step into. Say no and let the chips fall.

The problem lies with your DH. He's so keen on being the village star that it's got out of control and you're roped in too. Same in many villages - they depend on a few people to keep volunteering and everyone else sits back and does nothing. It's unfair but you just can't force people to get involved if they don't want to and that includes you! It's not the end of the world if there's no bingo.

He's prepared to sacrifice your comfort for a bunch of neighbours who give nothing back.

Tell him no, and mean it.

If that means it's cancelled, that is not on you.

Hear hear

Make up your own.

"Big fat poo ... 82!"

"Sausages on sticks ... 66!"

"Round curvy waist- 88"!

If there was something I hated and had told my partner in advance I wouldn't do, then there'd be no question of me doing that thing, whoever he'd promised, whoever he felt i was letting down.

Absolutely agree. And I’m not scared of helping out when needed. But you’ve got a bingo boundary- don’t do it!

Ugh, sounds like my old village. Same few volunteers (Inc DH and me who ran the village shop 7 days a week).

We stepped back after a non-helpinng village gave us a detailed critique of the perfectly fine village fete we'd organised. Fuck 'em!

• villager

Honestly if my partner asked for my help, then yes I'd do it.

If it’s a village in mid-Devon, I’ll do it for you, @Nootherwayout .

Swap roles with dh .. then he can do it and u do something less stressful for u ?

The fact that you know you will be expected to do it every monty means you have to say no. Or you do it this time and say it was a one-off and mean it!

Are people paying entry tickets? That should pay to hire someone to do it.

ooh yes this but passive aggressive

"Bunch of ingrates...twenty eight"
"Wish I was home watching TV...thirty three"
"this is such a bore...forty four"
"I'm unwillingly conscribed....number five"
"You're all dicks...sixty six..." etc.

Love the idea of making up my own or using rude ones 😂 that would go down badly 😂.
@MavisMcMinty I’d love to take you up on your offer but I’m literally the opposite end of the country ☹️.
@Kougarchew DH’s role is even more boring! Checking the numbers when people win, sorting out the music in the breaks etc and keeping an eye on the bar (which I also hate 🙈).
I know I’m far too soft but I feel like it’s too late to back out now. But while I have the microphone I’ll be putting out a call for volunteers and telling them it won’t be able to go ahead next month without a volunteer and telling DH (again) it’s a hard no for next month and that he needs to find someone else or cancel.

*adds to the list. At least I can have fun with my work friends at lunch time making up the rest of the numbers 😂.

You're in it now so do it this time and NEVER again. Have fun with it, like some examples above. Call whatever you want and if you want to, just say the number alone. Hope you make some great ones up OP

Ha ha! That’s why I volunteered, I’d’ve really enjoyed making up the rhymes!

See it as a challenge!😀have a drink first if you feel like one then get up there and relish; putting your own names to the numbers and laughing off complaints,know you are making it possible for some lonely people to have a night out,joining in the community and saving the day.
alternatively,paying someone else could work but you'd be chucking a shy youngster under a bus.
go for it!😀