To be quite rude to kids wanting to engage with me?

[Brieandcran]

I know - I sound like a really horrible person here and maybe I am, but I’m wondering about this.

It feels like nearly every time I take my very young children to a park or soft play someone else’s child or children latches onto us and it’s really irritating. Today I was at the playground in the morning and two little boys were there and would not stop trying to get my attention. I was saying to my eldest that a piece of equipment was for bigger children and these two kids were shouting across me that no it wasn’t, they went on it, watch, watch. I ignored at first but ended up saying something like ‘thank you but I need to focus on my own children.’ Then ‘where is your mummy or daddy?’ But they just carried on.

I also had it at soft play (with a different family) where someone actually had a go at ME for their misbehaviour and I had to quite sharply say they weren’t my kids!

I don’t want to be unpleasant about it but when they don’t listen to not now, go and find your mummy or whatever - what the hell do you do? I really want to be playing with my own children not someone else’s!

'I can be rude to everyone but no one can be rude to me!'

Or maybe 'you can be rude to children, but not other adults'?

My motto is

“I can’t be arsed with engaging with 4 years olds that I have no relationship with, so will keep it to the bare min BUT if MY child tries to engage with you and you don’t engage…. I will internally rage and silently implore you to engage”

Yep, I’m a hypocrite 😂

This happens to me sometimes at softplays, parks, and at the beach on holiday etc. I don’t mind in the slightest and actually enjoy it. My primary focus is on my children but I’m happy to chat to other kids and often encourage a conversation between them and mine. I think it shows my daughter social skills.

If you want them to leave you alone though you just stop engaging so much or walk off to play on something else. I’ve never had an issue shaking kids off. I think it’s cruel to be too harsh or blunt to them.

@FoxLark I don’t mind kids coming up and engaging with me in the slightest!! I enjoy it and will happily chat to them and encourage conversation between them and my kids. We don’t all feel the way of the OP so please don’t worry!! I have some hilarious conversations with random kids and enjoy it 😊 your son would be welcome to chat to me and my kids!!

Same 😊
My parents take my kids to the park with extra snacks and toys bc they love entertaining all the kids

Sadly, some children are neglected and crave the attention they're not being given. That's why they go out of their way to keep an adults' focus on them. If they are young enough to need this (either chronologically or emotionally) I wouldn't be letting them go to the park etc unsupervised. If ours were bothering someone else I'd go check on them or rein them in. That's what responsibility is like, it's tiring and frustrating but it's not fair to go out with your kids to get time off so someone you don't know can take over.

My parents take my kids to the park with extra snacks and toys bc they love entertaining all the kids

So whilst I’m working hard to stop my children being annoying, your parents are undoing that hard work by offering goodies? Thanks a lot.

And the stranger danger message?

Don't mind at all, but I work with children and actually like them.
Some of the attitudes on here are weirdly cold.

The interloping kids trying to overrule your decision on what equipment is acceptable for your child to play on is a big nope for me.
I would literally tell them straight to stop parenting my child & to go away if they can’t just play.
As for coming over to engage with me I’d ask where their parent was 1st & check if it was ok for them to interact with me as I don’t know them & they don’t know me.
Any diversion from what I am comfortable with my child doing at the park & I would ask the interlopers to go off & play by themselves if they can’t respect my wishes.
I am not changing how I use a park & supervising other people’s kids who put themselves in danger because they won’t or don’t listen!

If you do spot these awful grandparents being nice to your kids you could just whisk them away and maybe throw the odd rude word at them for good measure.

Sorry, but you sound judgmental and lacking empathy.

If you do spot these awful grandparents being nice to your kids you could just whisk them away and maybe throw the odd rude word at them for good measure

Thank you, I’ll try that, generally I’m one of the mums playing with my own children, as the grandparents should be with their own.

@Probationnotontarget

your kids are all teenagers according to another thread!

You're never too old to need pushing on the swings.

Ooopsie

Good grief, lighten up - no I wouldn’t, hence the emoji, but I would ignore the child if I wasn’t in the mood to engage. Children need to learn how to read body language and understand when somebody doesn’t want to engage with them - it’s called growing and learning 😐

They're wronguns
They might even clap when your kid goes down the slide
If you see them do it, throw a rock at them

I find it strange that your parents will pack extra toys and snacks for total stranger's kids in a public park, especially in the world we live in today, it's not as safe and friendly as it was "back in the day" . Some parents don't take lightly to that considering as I state your parents are total strangers to their kids and them🤔

They're wronguns
They might even clap when your kid goes down the slide
If you see them do it, throw a rock at them

What about the children with allergies or diabetics? You really shouldn’t be offering snacks to other children. Absolute madness.

They probably check with the parents first.

Bit annoying though. When you have to play bad cop and say no to the lollipop or breadstick die to allergy or fact that you’re about to head home for lunch or they get hyper on sugar.

This thread gets more batshit every time I check in on it. But most amusing.