It is interesting because there have been times when another adult has done something similar and it is hard to deal with. I had this at the airport once when someone tried to engage me in conversation about where I was travelling to, he was off to visit family and clearly wanting to share his excitement, but I wasn’t there for a happy reason and I really wanted to be left alone. I think generally most - not all - adults will recognise when someone is responding politely but not wanting to chat.
The difference with children is that they don’t have these social cues as a rule and will demand attention in ways that are overt and difficult to ignore. So on one occasion I remember, one little girl kept trying to lift my toddler up and I kept having to tell her to stop. I did it in a ‘nice’ way - ‘she’s not old enough, she doesn’t enjoy that love’ but where an adult would take the hint kids don’t. Then she started asking for some blueberries DD was eating - okay, but then rifling through our bag looking for more. Told her to stop because you can’t ignore that but it does mean you’re sort of ‘parenting’ someone else’s child and when your own take every ounce of energy from your soul some days, it’s a more saintly person than me who would not get fed up of it. And from the voting I think most people agree.
@Goldbar i hesitated before saying this but before this thread I thought you were one of MNs more sensible posters. It’s a shame in some ways because Lord knows we need them.
It is one thing someone saying I think YABU. OK - it’s hard not to feel something when you feel it but I get not everyone sees the world in the same way. What is nearly as wearing as random kids is when posters decide something is happening and keep on and on and on saying that it did despite being told over and over it did not.
You have said:
I find adults shadowing tiny children really irritating when they clog up the soft play. Get out of the older kids section and leave it for, well, the older kids
At no point had I indicated this happened. It didn’t. I have told you it didn’t.
The best thing you can do is take your squashable tinies and find somewhere more suitable for them. Most soft plays have an age-appropriate section for tiny children (the under-5s section).
Yes. This is where we always are. You’ve been told this.
If you're not in the soft play structure making an exhibition of yourself, you won't attract other people's children like flies
Deliberately trying to make out your own version of events so you can get an insult in.
If they're in the little kids section, you tell them to get out and if they don't, you ask staff/parents to intervene
So you finally concede we are doing nothing wrong, although interestingly you still insist that my job is to sort other children as well as supervising my own, and the parents are doing nothing wrong but OK.
Then you say
Far from moaning at other people's children, we should be trying to stay out of their way as much as possible and apologising for our presence. Because having adults impose themselves in children's play spaces changes the dynamic for all the children using them.
Again, your language here is purposeful so I’ll respond with like - any adult apologising to children for pushing a toddler on a swing is quite frankly madder than a box of frogs.
if they turn up at the playground and there's another parent there drawing a crowd with bubbles/their monster impression/pretending to be a snorting pig, what do you expect them to do?
You have been told over and over this is not what happens, what we are posting about. No one is pretending to be a snorting pig (funny choice that) I am pushing my child on a swing, or steadying a wobbly just-walker on a rocker, or similar. There are quite a few parents on this thread saying this happened to them when swimming, I’m sure you’ll decide they were doing a Shamu impersonation but I am fairly certain they were swimming.
YABU is one thing. YABU because of my fictitious version of events I’m going to keep on and on repeating is really exhausting and so dull. Please pack it in.