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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wish tall people would all F off sometimes

328 replies

LaMaG · 19/06/2023 21:07

OK, I know I am BU. I am 5'3", so not tiny. I went to a gig last night to a group that I was a huge fan of as a teenager and as soon as I arrived I realised there was no televised screen therefore I would not see anything. I should have seen it coming, it was a summer festival tent, not a venue as such with facilities. I moved around a bit eventually catching glimpses of the band every now again only to be immediately blocked again by a big person standing in front.

This weekend I also had my DD's gymnastics display which was a local thing with fold up chairs in a gym. A child sat in front of me and only then did I realise the huge relief I felt as I had been anxious a big man would sit in front and that was it ruined for me. Yes I could have craned my neck and been uncomfortable but DD would not have seen me and she was really nervous and needed to keep looking to me for reassurance.

It just got me thinking of all the times in my life I have paid to see something but just spent my time looking at the back of big stupid necks and shoulders, of feeling like my face was shoved into an arm pit. I have lost interest in live music and certain other things for this very reason but we are supposed to just put up with it, tough luck its your fault for being smaller.

Would it really be unreasonable for allowances to be made. I get there are many working problems with segregation by size but it seems to me that its not completely unworkable. For example there could be a priority viewing area in the front of gigs for people under 5'5", if they chose to move there. Or in a more casual setting, would be it unreasonable to ask - God forbid - that a taller person sits on the back row. I find it hard to believe tall people are all so selfish, I'm sure many would comply but this needs to be organised and normalised. It would be no more unfair than a person paying for a ticket not to see what they paid for.

OP posts:
Lulubo1 · 19/06/2023 21:17

Tall people have as much control over their height as short people do over theirs. What about if a tall person is with a shorter person? Do they sit separately at an event? I don't want to sound harsh, but there are way more important things in life to be concerned about right now

Aquamarine1029 · 19/06/2023 21:17

I'm 6' and it's not my fault you're short. If I've paid for a seat/ticket, I'm not moving.

YellowAndGreenToBeSeen · 19/06/2023 21:17

I bloody love being tall.

Except for when I have to fold myself in half on airplane seats, theatre seats or under a table not designed for People of Height. Buying trousers is a right pain and mini skirts are belts on me (but I’ve got cracking legs, so…).

OP, tall people are being ‘selfish’, we’re just going about living our life.

CleverLilViper · 19/06/2023 21:17

As a fellow short person I feel your pain but as I’m so short, most people are taller than me so it’s a pain at gigs. I’ve learned where I can to avoid floor seating unless I can get front row. I made the mistake once and paid a ton for floor seating to see my favourite singer ever for the first time in my life and ended up staring at the back of someone throughout. Ruined it for me but not their fault because everyone in front stood up. So they had to.

The next time I was smarter and picked seats in the stands and had a much better time. You just have to make do sometimes.

Original poster
LaMaG · 19/06/2023 21:19

Tannedandfake · 19/06/2023 21:15

‘Tall people are so selfish’
Dear god! Like they have chosen to be that height

Read the post, I said the opposite - I don't think tall people are selfish, I am saying venue organisers need to consider people of all heights and at least make some attempt at allowances, its up to people whether they avail of them or not.

OP posts:
saveforthat · 19/06/2023 21:20

What a ridiculous post. I'm quite tall, I really envy short people on economy flights. I think they should have some shorter leg room seats that short people have to sit in and give the extra room to tall people.

Gherkingreen · 19/06/2023 21:20

Hahhahahahaha. No.
5ft11 here, spent most of my teen in the 80s/90s trying to make myself look shorter to fit in with my friends and appeal to boys.
Thank god those days are gone and I will continue to embrace the height I've been gifted.
Long live the long limbed!

Chenford · 19/06/2023 21:20

Let’s play substitutions…

AIBU to wish fat people would all F off sometimes

OK, I know I am BU. I am size 12, so not tiny. I went to a gig last night to a group that I was a huge fan of as a teenager and as soon as I arrived I realised there was no televised screen therefore I would not see anything. I should have seen it coming, it was a summer festival tent, not a venue as such with facilities. I moved around a bit eventually catching glimpses of the band every now again only to be immediately blocked again by a big person standing in front.

This weekend I also had my DD's gymnastics display which was a local thing with fold up chairs in a gym. A child sat in front of me and only then did I realise the huge relief I felt as I had been anxious a big man would sit in front and that was it ruined for me. Yes I could have craned my neck and been uncomfortable but DD would not have seen me and she was really nervous and needed to keep looking to me for reassurance.

It just got me thinking of all the times in my life I have paid to see something but just spent my time looking at the back of big stupid necks and shoulders, of feeling like my face was shoved into an arm pit. I have lost interest in live music and certain other things for this very reason but we are supposed to just put up with it, tough luck its your fault for being smaller.

Would it really be unreasonable for allowances to be made. I get there are many working problems with segregation by size but it seems to me that its not completely unworkable. For example there could be a priority viewing area in the front of gigs for people under size 16 if they chose to move there. Or in a more casual setting, would be it unreasonable to ask - God forbid - that a fatter person sits on the back row. I find it hard to believe fat people are all so selfish, I'm sure many would comply but this needs to be organised and normalised. It would be no more unfair than a person paying for a ticket not to see what they paid for.

🤔🤔🤔

Watercoloursky · 19/06/2023 21:21

I'm 5'1... seated events are a pain so I always try to get front row or at least an aisle so I can lean out and see round the inevitably taller person in front...

...for standing things I have learned to he shameless about asking tall people if I can please stand in front of them. They never say no, and I'm not blocking their view, so what's the harm?

That said, being short has its advantages on flights, etc- being able to curl up comfortably and sleep with no worries about leg room is ace! :-)

Ponderingwindow · 19/06/2023 21:22

It’s become pretty clear my dd isn’t going to grow past 4’10”. i Do worry about things like this. At this point most things she attends still have children in the mix and she can push to the front with them and try to blend in.

AuntMarch · 19/06/2023 21:22

Far worse than all of that is when the tube is rammed in the summer and your face is armpit level with everyone else standing squashed against you.

TomatoSandwiches · 19/06/2023 21:22

At 5ft 3 you are 1 inch under the average height for an adult woman in the UK, it is not so small to be considered a disability so no, you are not entitled to any special allowances, grow up.. pun not intended 😂

Peacepudding · 19/06/2023 21:23

I'm short and I get where you're coming from OP. I have to consider the rake in theatres - in our local theatre I can't sit in the stalls. At school events I can never see anything. Tall people will NEVER get what it's like.

yut · 19/06/2023 21:23

I should have seen it coming

Grin
helloisitmeyourelookingfor · 19/06/2023 21:23

Well aren't you a pleasure and a delight OP?

I hate it when short arses sit tutting and complaining behind me in the theatre

Unfortunately theatre seats do not offer much legroom so I have to sit up tall rather than slouching down for your convenience -shame!

Concerts wise I'm too old to bother standing now
I think everyone needs to sit down at concerts so everyone can see better

CleverLilViper · 19/06/2023 21:25

Watercoloursky · 19/06/2023 21:21

I'm 5'1... seated events are a pain so I always try to get front row or at least an aisle so I can lean out and see round the inevitably taller person in front...

...for standing things I have learned to he shameless about asking tall people if I can please stand in front of them. They never say no, and I'm not blocking their view, so what's the harm?

That said, being short has its advantages on flights, etc- being able to curl up comfortably and sleep with no worries about leg room is ace! :-)

Got to say I agree with this. There’s lots of perks to being short as well. Better flight experiences etc.

there’s perks to both. If you’re standing at a gig if you ask the person in front if you can stand in front of them they may allow it.

ApocalypseNowt · 19/06/2023 21:26

My dad used to make me 'stilts' out of paint pots and string....maybe try that?

MrsO3 · 19/06/2023 21:28

You're being totally unreasonable OP. This thread is all because you have your knickers in a twist over tall people?! Calm down, jheez

BlinkeredBay · 19/06/2023 21:29

LaMaG · 19/06/2023 21:19

Read the post, I said the opposite - I don't think tall people are selfish, I am saying venue organisers need to consider people of all heights and at least make some attempt at allowances, its up to people whether they avail of them or not.

Show quote history

Your thread title doesn’t read that way….

FlissyPaps · 19/06/2023 21:30

I’m 5’9”.

I will never allow short people to try and make me feel guilty about my height or try and bully me for being infront of them at gig/event.

Deal with it.

AlfietheSchnauzer · 19/06/2023 21:30

LaMaG · 19/06/2023 21:07

OK, I know I am BU. I am 5'3", so not tiny. I went to a gig last night to a group that I was a huge fan of as a teenager and as soon as I arrived I realised there was no televised screen therefore I would not see anything. I should have seen it coming, it was a summer festival tent, not a venue as such with facilities. I moved around a bit eventually catching glimpses of the band every now again only to be immediately blocked again by a big person standing in front.

This weekend I also had my DD's gymnastics display which was a local thing with fold up chairs in a gym. A child sat in front of me and only then did I realise the huge relief I felt as I had been anxious a big man would sit in front and that was it ruined for me. Yes I could have craned my neck and been uncomfortable but DD would not have seen me and she was really nervous and needed to keep looking to me for reassurance.

It just got me thinking of all the times in my life I have paid to see something but just spent my time looking at the back of big stupid necks and shoulders, of feeling like my face was shoved into an arm pit. I have lost interest in live music and certain other things for this very reason but we are supposed to just put up with it, tough luck its your fault for being smaller.

Would it really be unreasonable for allowances to be made. I get there are many working problems with segregation by size but it seems to me that its not completely unworkable. For example there could be a priority viewing area in the front of gigs for people under 5'5", if they chose to move there. Or in a more casual setting, would be it unreasonable to ask - God forbid - that a taller person sits on the back row. I find it hard to believe tall people are all so selfish, I'm sure many would comply but this needs to be organised and normalised. It would be no more unfair than a person paying for a ticket not to see what they paid for.

Priority seating at the front for short people?!?!?! I would agree with say, short people on the left, tall people on the right for example but to say you deserve to be at the front in prime position just because you're short is pure CF!!!

Curseofthenation · 19/06/2023 21:30

Maybe invest in some gigantic platform boots OP?

I don't think you can make tall people stand at the back. I guess what @Clymene suggested could work, but people don't want to be split up from their friends and family. I guess you'll just have to rock up at gigs early and donning your brand new platforms.

mayorofcasterbridge · 19/06/2023 21:30

MessyBunt · 19/06/2023 21:10

What a nasty thread.

Don't be so fucking ridiculous!!

Ohhelpicantthinkofaname · 19/06/2023 21:33

I’m the same height as you OP and yeah it’s irritating when a really tall person stand or sits right in front of you. But if we segregated by size DH and I could never sit together as he’s 6ft2. Actually, maybe you’re onto something there 🤔

Oysterbabe · 19/06/2023 21:34

I've voted yanbu because I'm still annoyed about DS's nativity. It was every man for himself for seating and a granny rushed in and reserved 4 seats in the front row, we got seats in the second. 2 minutes before the start the mother, grandfather and dad turn up. Both men were enormous, 6ft 4ish. We could see precisely fuck all, and I imagine it was the same for the rows behind us as flat surface. It felt really selfish.