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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the parents of children who are in childcare would like to see them more often?

1008 replies

tori32 · 21/02/2008 21:46

I CM and have several sets of parents who finish work early on many occasions who never collect their child early. I know I am paid and it does not bother me in the slightest to look after them for their agreed hours, I just feel sorry for the child because they are missing out on this extra time with parents who work full time.

I was a working mum for 3 months (as in not CM) but always collected dd early when I finished early because I wanted to spend time with her. AIBU?

OP posts:
Kathyis6incheshigh · 22/02/2008 16:59
alfiesbabe · 22/02/2008 17:00

Nicetry your last post is totally illogical

cornsilk · 22/02/2008 17:00

My ds was cared for by my mum as I was in f/t work till he was 2 and a half. She adored him and he was in a loving environment. I also have read that Steven Biddulph book. However I think he would have been more stimulated if he'd been with my current childminder for at least part of the time. She is very experienced and he would have had more opportunities to play with other children. My childminder is wonderful. I am confident that she doesn't gossip with other childminders about parents and children - she's far too professional and caring to do that. Reading the ops comments only makes me appreciate her all the more.

Lulumama · 22/02/2008 17:01

rubbish. nursery nurses, CMs, nannies etc all have their own bills to pay. don;t equate wanting to make a living with not loving what you do....

childcare is hardly massively well paid, so i would like to think that liking/loving children and helping them develop is a big part of why people work in childcare.

Bangandthedirtisgone · 22/02/2008 17:01

NiceTry, Viggo, you're really failing to sell this SAHM thing to me. I was in two minds as to which path to take when our baby is born. Judging by the two sides on this thread I now know which camp I'd rather be in.

hatrick · 22/02/2008 17:03

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hatrick · 22/02/2008 17:05

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cornsilk · 22/02/2008 17:07

Oh and nicetry I insisted on paying my mum the going rate. I even paid her in the holidays.

CristinaTheAstonishing · 22/02/2008 17:07

I don't think it's about two camps, either. It's about talking out of books vs knowing real people with their real lives.

Oblomov · 22/02/2008 17:08

Nicetry, please respond to my questions.

hatrick · 22/02/2008 17:08

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prettybird · 22/02/2008 17:08

I wouldn't have let the childminder do it for free - she has her own business to run and costs to meet. I also valued what she was doing for ds - playing with him far more and naturally than I would have ever been able to do, and exposing him on a daily basis to lots of other kids - and giving me the time to go to work without worrying about ds. He went in happy and came out happy - that was all that mattered to me.

WallOfSilence · 22/02/2008 17:08

Nicetry, are you a childminder?

viggoswife · 22/02/2008 17:10

Failing to sell this SAHM thing to you? I dont care what you do. I couldnt give two hoots about your choices Bangandthedirtisgone.

Please note that once again I managed to post without getting personal. Why dont we all try it?

Ellbell · 22/02/2008 17:10

sagitta and georgedon't...

Don't judge all CMs by the couple of ignorant ones on this thread. I've used a cm for the last 4.5 years and it's been the best thing I could have done. My dds love her and she loves them.

I am off home now. Dds are spending the afternoon with their GPs (who live a long way away and relish a few hours alone with them, which is why I'm hanging around at work for an extra half-hour...).

hatwoman · 22/02/2008 17:11

hatrick I have to leave to go out in 5 mins - and I don't like the idea of having pissed you off....tell me what I did?

Bangandthedirtisgone · 22/02/2008 17:12

I don't care if NiceTry is a SAHM or not.

She made the following comment:

"I do judge mothers who choose to work rather than care for their baby I think they have made a poor parenting choices"

Lulumama · 22/02/2008 17:12

my CM is so lovely, i invited her for Xmas lunch. so don;t judge all CMs by the OP

Lulumama · 22/02/2008 17:12

she must judge herself as she also works!!

hatrick · 22/02/2008 17:13

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Bangandthedirtisgone · 22/02/2008 17:15

Course it's a bloody two sides thing. It's just another SAHM vs WOHM debate started by someone who should have known better.

hatwoman · 22/02/2008 17:19

ahh. good. now I can go out for the evening, withuot feeling guilty. about anythingg

WallOfSilence · 22/02/2008 17:19

"I do judge mothers who choose to work rather than care for their baby I think they have made a poor parenting choices"

Surely it is the best parenting choice if the other option is to stay at home resenting child for being the cause of staying at home?

hatrick · 22/02/2008 17:20

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Bangandthedirtisgone · 22/02/2008 17:21

Er, it was a tongue in cheek comment.

Fuck me, do you really think I'd make my parenting choices based on what you lot think?

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