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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she made the coffee too hot on purpose?

395 replies

Rollonannualeave · 11/06/2023 13:35

Just need some perspective as I nearly complained but then didn't want to be "that person" especially in front of my son. I've just been on a long walk with dogs and son, all lovely and we ended up in a little coffee shop that also sells plants and groceries.

I've been in once before and whenever I go, the lady that works there ways seems to look me up and down in a judgemental way. I thought I was imagining it so went again today.

I ordered a cappacino for me and lemonade for my son. We got the lemmondae instantly but then I had to wait about 10 to 15 minutes for my coffee. She literally served everyone else before me (even the people that came afterwards). My son had finished his lemondade. When I finally received my coffee it was scalding hot and I burned my tongue. I had to wait another 10 minutes for it to cool down. AIBU to think she has something against me for no reason? I've never been rude to her and don't know her. Or am I being paranoid?

OP posts:
ilovepixie · 11/06/2023 15:11

She always looks you up and down! But I've only been in here once! Okay paranoid much!

Original poster
Rollonannualeave · 11/06/2023 15:12

She always looks you up and down! But I've only been in here once! Okay paranoid much

To clarify. Only been in once before for coffee. But have popped in 4 or 5 times for milk or a newspaper or dog food.

OP posts:
CatfoodOzymandias · 11/06/2023 15:15

Right. And she doesn't like you.. because? You are giving her too much custom?

RosesAndHellebores · 11/06/2023 15:15

Perhaps she's admiring your outfit when she looks at you.

Next time op "sorry to bother, but we are in a bit of a hurry, could I have some cold milk please, so I can drink up quickly".

olympicsrock · 11/06/2023 15:17

I’d just vote with your feet.

loislovesstewie · 11/06/2023 15:19

The McDonald's case, the woman concerned put the cup between her thighs so that she could add milk, the cup toppled over which is why she was scalded. She was in a car which had no cup holders so decided that was the best way to hold the cup and add milk. The cup was a flimsy paper cup and collapsed from the pressure of her thighs. While I feel sorry for the woman, I was flabbergasted that she thought it was a good move.

Confrontayshunme · 11/06/2023 15:23

@NewNovember RBF= Resting B**ch Face

rightioly · 11/06/2023 15:24

loislovesstewie · 11/06/2023 15:19

The McDonald's case, the woman concerned put the cup between her thighs so that she could add milk, the cup toppled over which is why she was scalded. She was in a car which had no cup holders so decided that was the best way to hold the cup and add milk. The cup was a flimsy paper cup and collapsed from the pressure of her thighs. While I feel sorry for the woman, I was flabbergasted that she thought it was a good move.

I don't think it was ever argued that it was fine for her to hold it like that. But the damage would have been far less if mcdonalds had made their coffee properly. It was far hotter than any other coffee they tested.

PipinwasAuntieMabelsdog · 11/06/2023 15:25

Your posts sound 'off' @Rollonannualeave I don't know why, but maybe you and this cafe owner don't like each other? Find another cafe, life is too short to pay to be somewhere you feel uncomfortable.

AndDoTheTangoInTheNightTAAAAAANGOOO · 11/06/2023 15:26

Order iced coffee if you want it cold 🤷‍♀️. If I ordered a hot drink I'd hope it was actually hot and proceed with caution before taking a sip.

brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr · 11/06/2023 15:26

always annoying when people order “fanny about with the steam wand” coffees and slow the queue down.

😎

Susuwatariandkodama · 11/06/2023 15:27

I don’t understand why so many people are taking the piss? Coffee shouldn’t burn you, I’ve never been burnt and I drink plenty of cappuccinos and lattes, sounds like you had some awful service, was she rushed off her feet a bit and forgot your coffee?

NessieMcNessface · 11/06/2023 15:27

Stick with your gut instinct. You might be wrong but if you have a feeling that someone doesn’t like you for some reason there’s a good chance you’re right; I just wouldn’t go to that particular place again.

Marchintospring · 11/06/2023 15:30

Op I think go with your gut. about her liking you.You can tell when people are off (lots of advice on here about trusting your gut with men).

Ckearly you needed to have said something at the time. Coffee shouldn’t be scalding hot. Tell her I tasted burnt or something.
However it’s not on to give your son his lemonade ages before you. Clearly he’d have finished his before you got yours. That’s poor.

Original poster
Rollonannualeave · 11/06/2023 15:31

@AndDoTheTangoInTheNightTAAAAAANGOOO

You may not realise. But there is a middle ground between iced coffee and freaking lava!

OP posts:
loislovesstewie · 11/06/2023 15:31

Not wishing to derail the thread, but to me, it was a flimsy cup. I would have thought it obvious how hot the coffee was because the cup was so poor. Yes, I know the coffee was hotter than that produced elsewhere, it still left me flabbergasted. I'll end on that.

CatfoodOzymandias · 11/06/2023 15:33

Cafe owners are rushed off their feet at the moment because there are no staff. I don't believe that any have time to look customers up and down and then deliberately try to scald them.

Original poster
Rollonannualeave · 11/06/2023 15:34

@Marchintospring good advice thank you. Plus the other rather nicer waitress rushed out with water bowls for the dogs. As soon as we arrived. Every one served before me. Even the dogs. It was a nice gesture from the other waitress of course. I'm not begrudging that 😂

OP posts:
TooJoy · 11/06/2023 15:34

Of course the coffee is going to be hot.

The reason you have cooler coffees in other places is probably because it has cooled down by the time it gets to you.

If your coffee came out cold then you would have every right to complain/ask for a new one.

You cannot complain that a hot coffee is hot because that’s how it’s meant to be.
Its like complaining an ice pole is cold.

It sounds as though you think this woman has an issue with you so you are trying to find anything to complain about.

Original poster
Rollonannualeave · 11/06/2023 15:36

You cannot complain that a hot coffee is hot because that’s how it’s meant to be.
Its like complaining an ice pole is cold

It's degrees of heat. I drink about 4 or 5 cups of tea a day. So I am used to hot drinks.

OP posts:
Ourshoddyhouse · 11/06/2023 15:36

FWIW I don't think yabu that the coffee was too hot,but I do think yabu to think it was deliberate. A lot of people are just shit at making coffee.

Thegoodbadandugly · 11/06/2023 15:36

Hot coffee whatever next, seriously some people really need some proper problems it might help put things in perspective.

Back21970 · 11/06/2023 15:36

Sounds off to me, some people do just take an instant dislike to others unfortunately and it’s not a nice feeling.

Unless you have a pattern of feeling this way I would trust your instincts on this occasion.

Leave a FB review and if you like the place generally, do go back and if it happens again complain.

At best think her customer service skills could do with a bit of work!

And yes, obviously coffee should be hot, think we all know that 😂

mooncloud1 · 11/06/2023 15:37

Spamlla · 11/06/2023 13:52

coffee being hot is expected
There’s a difference between “hot but drinkable” and “scalding to the point of injuring someone if they try to drink it”.

Exactly, I'm amazed people seem to think there is one temperature to heat coffee at.
There was a story of a women in America who's coffee very badly scalded her as it was made way too hot, and this was proved later on.

TooJoy · 11/06/2023 15:37

Susuwatariandkodama · 11/06/2023 15:27

I don’t understand why so many people are taking the piss? Coffee shouldn’t burn you, I’ve never been burnt and I drink plenty of cappuccinos and lattes, sounds like you had some awful service, was she rushed off her feet a bit and forgot your coffee?

Surely you don’t start glugging down a hot drink as soon as you get it?
You let it cool down and then blow and sip it.

With an open top, hot drinks cool down pretty fast so they’re not going to make them warm to begin with else they’ll be cold by the time they get to the customer.