To feel pissed off that everyone is spelling my new baby’s name wrong?

[Algor1thm]

We’ve named our new baby a name which has several legitimate and well used spellings. The spelling we’ve gone with is actually the original spelling, but is the second most popular spelling in use in the UK currently. Think Isabelle versus Isabel for example. It’s not a made up or unknown spelling, and is completely phonetic. The name itself isn’t particularly unusual.

Almost everyone is already spelling the baby’s name wrong - over half of our new baby cards are spelt wrong. I’ve literally texted people “meet baby ‘Isabelle’” and right below they’ve written something like “congratulations, ‘Isabel’ is beautiful” etc.

I knew the spelling would be an issue going forward but I sort of expected people might be able to read what I’d written and spell it right the moment they were told the name. It’s probably just my hormones, but AIBU to think it’s quite rude not to make the effort to spell the baby’s name correctly in the new baby card?

My name can be written 3 different ways and some relatives latched on to a particular one and never managed to readjust to the one that's me.

DS has a name that is spelled one way as a name in itself and another as a diminutive of the full name and two other ways as more 'trendy' and yes, people get it wrong all the time. A bit like John, Jon(argon), Jonny, Johny etc)

We take it on the chin and don't get too het up about it. We know what we're called, and we know who we are.

Congratulations on the birth of your DC
Unfortunately you and your DC will have to get used to it. My DD has a similar common name with multiple spellings, just like your example of Isabelle, Isabel. DC’s is still constantly getting spelt incorrectly, more frequently than correctly. Even high school, who have it written on the register, sometimes spell it in a really unusual way which we presume is similar to a past student. It used to annoy us and DD but we’ve just had to get used to it and now only correct people when it matters.

Totally understand OP, we had the same.
To this day, people still spell it wrong, I'll write a text with DS' name, and they'll respond on the NEXT LINE with the wrong spelling. I mean, how hard is it???

It also makes me mad as the spelling we chose is the original spelling and somehow they keep going back to the WRONG spelling.

It did bother me a lot more then than it does now, so hopefully in time you'll be able to shrug it off too. Just chuckle at people's ignorance.

That’s just the case 🤷🏼‍♀️ It’s not really hilarious, it’s a fact. Although, the Americanised spelling is only marginally more used atm than the traditional spelling… both are commonly in use in the UK.

I've been called the wrong name for the entirety of my life. Simple same but people still assume it's another very similar name. Annoys me but I've just got used to it. I also have a fairly unusual English surname, so I'm used to spelling everything over the phone 😂 I decided not to take my husband's surname as I couldn't be arsed with any more effort on that part (his grandparents were Polish) but did double barrel our children 🤣🤣🤣 just roll with it op. And congratulations 🤗

You know what's important? That people are excited and love your new baby and what to welcome her. You know what's not important? That they spell her name right.

Haha no, but it would be a bit like if we were using Margot and everyone kept spelling it Margo.

My DD has an Irish name which is spelt the Gaelic way as she is of Irish heritage and in her 19 years we have had some funny spellings ! And how her name is pronounced! She absolutely loves that she has a very individual name and neither her nor us have been at all offended. At least they try.

I'd feel quite upset that people didn't care enough-especially if the name is right there in front of them!

People just use the name in their heads. My grandmother is in her 90s. She hasn't spelled my name right once, despite me signing her cards for 40 years. She uses the most rare version of it too, which makes it even more bizarre.

My child always gets this but people call her a different name think Amelia / Amelie type name... honestly can't be bothered to correct people anymore and it's been 8 years!

Almost no one spells my name correctly. I really don’t take it as a slight or a sign of anything deeper/more serious than maybe they aren’t very good at spelling.

My name has approximately 10 possible spellings. My spelling is one of the lesser used versions. I'm well used to people spelling it incorrectly but I do agree it's a bit 'can't be arsed' to get a name wrong in direct response to something like a text which contains the correct spelling.

I was mightily pissed off when my former boss spelled my name wrong when mentioning me in an email to a client, after I'd been working for him for 6 years! I was on CC as well 🙄

Haha! This, essentially.

One of DD's school friends was called Louis.

Ah, I said, "Loo-Ee, I love the french name and we had it as one of our choices" and she looked at me in utter horror. "It's LEWIS" she said. I must have looked very confused and asked her why she'd used the French spelling and not the English. It wasn't a remotely comfortable conversation and I learned to not question such a thing ever again.

Louis v Louie? Although can’t think of a film

I'd be annoyed too, but unfortunately you will get that with any common name that has multiple ways of spelling

This is the future, for you and your DC. Get a response practised and don’t let it bother you.

I’ve had to spell out my maiden name, my married name and the street I grew up on because they’re slightly different to the more commonly known spellings. And I’ve seen people write down what they think the word is not the letters I’m saying out loud.

Few people do it deliberately, many because they revert to known words and some because all spellings are a mystery to them. If there are variations, I’d get used to people making mistakes and not take it personally.

One of my brother’s (DB2) is dyslexic and had only just learned how to spell my other brother’s name because it has 4-5 variations. I then met my husband who has the same name but with the spelling that DB2 did incorrectly for DB1. So he uses the abbreviated version for both of them!

My niece who is 20 is a Kathryn, she gets all other versions, drives her and her mother mad. Teachers lecturers friends relatives classmates, all levels afflicted with an inability to get her name right. My own name has 5 letters , phonetically it can't really be anything other than how it is spelled, but still I get called longer names, and even names that have the same letters but rearranged.

As someone who has an appalling ability to remember names I am saying nothing.

Well, DS has a very unusual Italian surname.alway misspelt / mispronounced.

We just don’t care. I’m a lone parent and kept my birth name but always called comedy surname/mrs misspelt comedy surname. Still don’t care.

in Op position though you’ve given the correct spelling so is mighty annoying that your people keep misspelling. . Annoying but won’t affect your DC life outcomes.

I was thinking Catherine/Katherine/Kathryn.

It's kind of them to go to the effort of sending a card. You are being precious and ungrateful

Is it Ailsa/Elsa?

Relateable! My first born, Elliot: we still have one great Aunt and my cousin that spell it wrongly ( Elliott) I recall when recovering from his Caesarian whilst on morphine been grilled of the spelling! Hubby and I had already sorted and settled on that way before he was due! Our daughter Hannah, 99.9% of people we've encountered in her 10 years have spelt it correctly! Her middle name is Isabel - after her Great Aunt Isobel....so far no issues! It's a funny world!