To like some acknowledgment that walking everywhere is bloody exhausting!

[squashedalmondcroissant]

Not really an AIBU but I have PMT and need a little handhold (lighthearted 😂).

I don't drive but I am fortunate that I only live a 30 minute walk from work. This is also the main town centre so all the shops/facilities that I would need are there. If I need anything or want to do anything, this is where I need to go.

That's all fine but I would just like some sort of acknowledgment or recognition from the people in my life that walking everywhere (and I do mean everywhere) is really really tiring and hard work! The part of the country I live in is widely acknowledged as being not very good with public transport so virtually everyone has a car and drives everywhere even if they don't need to. So it's very hard to get people to comprehend that if I want to do an activity or get something I need to a) walk to and from the place and b) carry any equipment I need with me or carry it home with me. It's bloody hard work! I have a massive backpack that I carry everywhere in case I need something from the shop while I'm out.

I don't complain about this IRL as I know it's just the way things are but it's just hard sometimes when no one around me 'gets it'.

For example, yesterday I walked DDog for around an hour, then walked to work, walked around at work (job is fairly physical with almost the whole time on my feet and lots of lifting boxes), then walked home. Today will be much the same. Some days I'm exhausted before I even get to work!

Aibu to want just a tiny grain of recognition that this is hard?

Btw, having read your update, it is possible to keep a bike outside chained to a bracket fixed to a garden shed and covered with a special bike tarpaulin. You seem to have made a lot of choices that fit in with your dh’s life op, so I am sure he won’t begrudge you a bracket on your shed!

What a ridiculous comment.

I suppose you realise some people can't drive and can't afford to have a car?

I’ve almost always walked everywhere and I don’t find it particularly exhausting. It’s not the moral superiority - I hate driving and am a bad driver, and get travel sick in taxis and buses.

Thank you to all those who have been through similar and can relate, it does help 😊

Yes I can get deliveries but you have to pay extra, you can't always get what you want/need (substitutes etc) and if you only need a small amount it isn't worth it. Maybe for a big shop once a week but I use Aldi and Lidl a lot and they don't even offer delivery! Much easier to just pick up a can of tomatoes, some milk and a bag of potatoes on the way home but that stuff gets heavy really quickly 😂

Get rid of the backpack and get a shopping trolley, you don't need to be 90 to have one, I have to walk a lot too and my shopping trolly is the best thing ever

Eh ? I do it for some extra exercise.

Pavement pounding can be quite draining. If I've had a day of a high step count from a lot of functional plodding, it is more tiring compared to getting to the same number from something more active like running.

When I had a very walk heavy job plus walk to/ from work, I gained weight as by mid-afternoon, I'd be going for sugary drinks/ snacks to pick me up, particularly anticipating the uphill walk home.

Walking as your main form of transport will leave you with less spare energy compared to people completing the same tasks by car.

Cycling can be an easier option- that depends on access to safe routes though. I quite like a scooter for local errands where locking bikes up is awkward, as it can be folded, carried and put out of the way under a seat.

Yes. I didn't learn to drive until I was 30 (for a variety of reasons).

I was always happy to use public transport and walk, but it did get frustrating when social events and meet ups were planned with no thought for those who weren't driving.

Keep it outside. I have a bike bracket on the side of the house and a bike cover which came from decathlon.

Dp is away at the moment but I am going to talk to him about getting a bike at least and putting it somewhere when he gets back.

There must be a way we can work something, especially with the summer coming, work will be incredibly busy and I will be working longer and longer hours and it will make things so much quicker and easier for me.

I'm working 47 hrs this week and I'm just so so tired. My feet and knees hurt already from yesterday and I haven't even done anything yet!

Is there something glaringly important you have forgotten to add because I have no idea what acknowledgement you want

I walk everywhere it is just a fact for me

I walk practically everywhere within my hilly town, and I sympathise with the time taken, and difficulty carrying bigger loads BUT it does really improve your overall fitness. You may not notice it now, but you'll reap the benefit in future. I'm now early 60s and am definitely fitter than I was when I moved here about 10 years ago.

You did choose where you live because you chose to move in with him. Same with your job.

They’re all choices you made. Wanting acknowledgement because you can’t drive is just odd.

I work in care. If its any help my 95 plus year olds, at the moment, never drove regularly, are all in pretty good nick physically I'm there to do fairly low level stuff in their lives. That walking keeps them going. They're relatively strong and flexible - certainly none of them drove to work or the shops!

Slightly strange post . It's nobody else's fault that you choose not to be a driver/car owner. Do you not think that there should be some acknowledgement for those who, in their own time and with their own money, taking driving lessons and purchase a car, therefore removing the need to walk everywhere?

That's all fine but I would just like some sort of acknowledgment or recognition from the people in my life that walking everywhere (and I do mean everywhere) is really really tiring and hard work!
For example, yesterday I walked DDog for around an hour, then walked to work, walked around at work (job is fairly physical with almost the whole time on my feet and lots of lifting boxes), then walked home. Today will be much the same. Some days I'm exhausted before I even get to work!

You want people to fawn all over you for walking your dog and then walking to work?

I think it's just the fact that no one I know is in even a remotely similar position to me and it gets frustrating when people say 'oh just nip over to x to pick up y' when said place is a 45 minute walk from my house down a road with no pavement and I'll have to carry y home with me. Or when DP thinks DDog should have 2 walks a day instead of 1. I'm doing over 20,000 steps a day as it is! Even he doesn't fully get it.

Trying to get compost to do the garden is nigh on impossible! Big bags that are better value are too heavy to carry and nowhere delivers them 😭 Not a major issue but just an example that people don't even think about because they can just put it in the boot of the car.

Also - I never ask for lifts. Not only do I HATE relying on people for things but I don't want them to go out of their way. No one lives near me and I don't even know many people to ask.

I've put on a lot of lbs since I stopped walking everywhere and now I'm older and achy and I'm heavier, walking is hard. I wish I'd never stopped.
Also, you'd need to acknowledge every little hardship in everyone's lives for this to be a thing. Everyone's got stuff going on that causes them trouble in someway.

Snarky. Most of us do it for exercise.

If you wait for others to give you acknowledgement you'll be waiting a long time. Just acknowledge it to yourself, and make a change! Why do you have to talk to your DP about buying a bike? Just get on and do it. Buy a cover and a lock, and store it in the garden.

Tell him you're too tired to walk HIS dog. Presumably he managed it before you moved in?

The tone of your messages is quite passive, and I think there's more to all this. Find your power, and change stuff that isn't working for you.

Tell yourself 'yes, I am tired. Of course I am tired. I don't need to do this much. I need a rest. I deserve to have things be easier. I work hard enough'. Etc etc. Validate yourself.

I don't drive for the same reason, and certainly don't feel any "moral superiority" about walking - what a stupid remark.

However, I don't require any acknowledgement that walking everywhere is bloody exhausting as I don't think it is - and I'm almost 64. I enjoy my daily walks.

Do you need your dh’s permission to buy a bike op? I don’t mean this in a snarky way. I know you have debts but you can find a decent second hand one without spending a fortune. You are allowed to sort your life out to make it work for you.

OP - you could get a bicycle for your commute to work. Then a 30 minute walk would become a ten minute ride and you could have panniers or a basket for shopping.