“Pride is about identity not sex”

[Chocchops72]

“Pride is about identity not sex”

i just read this statement on a Twitter thread and it really caught my attention. Surely the whole point of Pride is (or was?) to demand / celebrate the right of gay people to have sex, legally, with other people of the same sex as themselves?

As a straight adult human female I don’t have much skin in this game, but this phrase just stood out for me as really weird. Isn’t sexuality - linked to one’s sex - the whole point? It’s like walking the walk, not just talking the talk.

I mean, if it’s true then I could ‘identify’ as a lesbian (not sure how) without ever actually having sex with a woman? But I’d be able to say I’m a lesbian? Am I understanding this correctly?

My take on this is that the whole trans issue is messing with our understanding of words, so now identity is confusing to us.

Our identity is the set of characteristics of our personality that make us unique and different from others. So my identity is of someone who wear dungarees and likes drinking red bull and sleeps with men and is a liberal voter. If I wanted to I could say 'I identify as a Liberal voter' as what I am saying is 'voting Liberal is my affinity'. But actually could also just say 'I am a Liberal voter'.

So although being in a relationship and attraction is a lot about sex. Pride is celebrating our ability to be our unique authentic selves. Previously you weren't allowed to express your sexual identitynif it wasnt heterosexual, it was thought of as a mental condition and illegal. Who you choose to spend your life with is a pretty massive part of your identity whether you sleep with them or not. Say I was a gay man who chose to date and live with another gay man. People don't technically know whether we are having sex or not, maybe we can't due to illness etc. But being a gay man would still be part of my identity and who I was.

That's a very good point.

Surely the statement is referring to biological sex not the act of having sex?
It's trying to eradicate homosexuality. A strange stance regarding Pride most would think.

And when I say strange - I mean vile.

There are plenty of gay people who aren't sexually active just as there are plenty of straight people who aren't sexually active.
I lost an elderly gay friend recently who was celibate all his life.
Pride isn't, and has never been, just about sex.

@Florissante it's not a good point. The LGB alliance on Twitter have come out with a lot of biphobia. Also as a group they have disproportionate number of straight members so it's odd to use them as an example here.

God why is everyone being so obtuse? Being attracted to someone isn't an identity its a physical reaction. No you don't have to have sex to know you are gay or straight but the attraction has to be there. Otherwise you'd be asexual.

I can't identify as a lesbian because I'm a human female but not attracted to other human females . That's it, no need for all the identity bollocks. As another poster above pointed out, identity is just personality, it can change over time. Your sexuality doesn't tend to change.

So you chose to have sex with someone you had zero sexual attraction to and you weren’t in the mood sexually, odd choice.

One is reality; the other feelings.

For example: I am autistic. That's reality. However, I don't 'identify' as autistic. If I started identifying as autistic and then stopped doing so, would I stop being autistic?

Men can 'identify' as women. But that's feelings. They don't start being women because of their feelings.

I’m sure pride is not about celebrating who I am- a straight welsh pregnant female

Surely Pride can be about whatever people think it is?

Or is this just another anti trans thread in disguise (even if that's not what you meant OP it will probably go that way).

I know plenty of straight people who go to Pride.

Well no, probably not. Why would it be?

“Pride is about identity not sex”

I read ‘sex’ as referring to whether you are biologically male or female, rather than sexual intercourse, making this quote about gender identity.

Being gay is an enormous part of people’s identities. It’s not just about sex.

All lies.

No, it's definitely about identity. It's not just about your sex life. I have avoided discussing simple things like having a date that evening because it was with a woman, about being able to discuss if it's OK to end up with the same name as your spouse - without being worried about how your colleagues or family will react. It's about being able to fully engage about your identity, to not cover up to be proud of who you are.

No. You are way of base. My identity as a bisexual woman would still be the same if I never had sex with another woman? You do realise that being lgbt is more than just sex?

Well if its more than just sex then can I, as a (biological)woman attracted to (biological) men, identify as gay?

And yeah, as a bisexual I've been made to feel it's not for me and have even had to justify my place on a parade float, so it's not all rainbows and unicorns.

Do you want to?

No I would think that would be quite homophobic don't you?

The 't' has nothing to do with sex.

Biphobia right there, you believe I'm only hetero with men and gay with women but I exist all the time