To think perimenopause can make you feel all over the place mentally

[Lifeswhatyoumakeit73]

I am 50 and well into perimenopause but am just about coping with the physical symptoms. It’s the mental & emotional stuff that’s really affecting me:

• overwhelm- at certain points in the month I genuinely feel like i cant cope with anything and I just want to take to my bed or run away
• a feeling of wanting to change everything but I can’t as I have 2 kids and that makes me feel a bit trapped
• can’t be arsed with anything- cleaning, cooking, my job- anything (that feeling tends to be worse when I have pms)
• Not wanting to work anymore!!! I have a lovely job supporting students at a university but have NO interest in it!
• Can’t cope with the kids problems - I feel overwhelmed by worry - I have a 15 year old and an 11 year old.

etc etc. I have days when I want to live simply without any responsibility, possessions etc!! I feel like it’s sending me a bit mad to be honest!

Anyone else?! It’s definitely worse with PMT and with the monthly fluctuations of hormones- I feel those more than I ever have to be honest.

Its the overwhelm though that really feels rubbish!

@Toomanysquishmallows sorry for your loss, that is a lot of hard stuff all going on at once

I am wondering if this is the reason why everything social bores me lately ?

Totally sympathise with you OP.

So many mentions of wanting to be by the sea! I'm lucky enough to live be the sea and I'm writing this from our beach hut.

I have a small successful business which I love and feel very proud of, 3 healthy DCs, a great DH, no financial worries, both parents are loving and supportive, I have many friends, an outstanding dog......

I feel conflicted and self-obsessed and I try and talk myself out of feeling low and meh by counting my blessings but sometimes, maybe 50% of the time, I can't.

Reading all these posts has made me realise that exercise (apart from walking the dog) is not a part of my life....maybe that will fix things.

Wow @BaconAndAvocado it sounds as if you should count your blessings. Having loving, supportive parents still around must be lovely, as well as a no financial worries and a successful business. I'm aiming to get to your point re the business and finance, cannot magic parents back or mould my husband and two boys into who I'd like them to be unfortunately (I am grateful that they are all healthy).. Apologies, if this sounds like a race to the bottom post. I do think that walking, light exercise and meditation help, try to fit all three in during the day. Also agree that having a dog is awesome.

I have a lot of this at the moment, but no physical symptoms. Periods as regular and annoyingly heavy / long as they've ever been.
Ive been wondering if im just burnt out but peri may explain a few things.

Octopus45 I count my blessings every day. When I’m having a “meh” day, I’m still aware of them. I just feel crap!

Well, I’ve put in my flexible work request today to go to 4 days! Woooooop!! I REALLY need it!!

Fingers crossed you’re successful 🤞🏻

Well done, and good luck.

Ah, my people.

I constantly feel exhausted and burnt out by lone parenting and all it entails, and I'm watching my small business slide down the toilet. I'm not getting many new customers or enquiries- I desperately need to do some serious publicity, social media campaign, SEO. Problem is the little voice in my head going "whoopee!" when I look at the prospect of a week with no work booked 😬 It's....so....hard....to motivate myself...

Funnily enough, I'm just coming out of the "inappropriate sex with inappropriate men" stage, which lasted several years. Unfortunately I didn't shut my FabSwingers profile down or update it, and have consequently found myself dating someone who is under the impression that I'm still an insatiable raving sex beast. I'm trying to find the best way to phrase "Sorry, that was last year's me, all I really want to do at the moment is go up on the moors and walk for miles in solitude".

I'm on HRT, but interested by the suggestion of testosterone. Not so much for my libido, but if it can help me with my get up and go so that I have the energy to save my business, that would be amazing.

Hi all,

I am early fifties, post menopausal, and having done a lot of research and had private consultations, this is what I've gleaned:

1 - I honestly don't think HRT brings weight gain. I think hormonal imbalance can do this and a lack of estrogen (compared to where you started out) def puts weight on the stomach. Plus, metabolism slows down - considerably - so you will be eating as you did, but probably need to start making dietary changes if you want to maintain or lose weight.

2 - whilst the NHS is not licensed, and your GP is not obliged, to give women testosterone, do ask for it. Refer to your low libido, as this is what the NICE guidelines refer to (and what your doctor will pay attention to). You will be prescribed a smaller amount of testosterone which is traditionally given to men - gallingly, whilst there is an Australian brand, Androfeme, medicated for women, it is not available on NHS only via private.

3 - many of you will develop osteoporosis without realising it - I did. HRT will help provide bone protection. Honesty, until you are told you have osteoporosis, you won't realise how much you care about your bone health.

4 - lift weights, go heavy! Join a weightlifting club! Honestly, it helps with all sorts of things, especially point 3 - and great for fat burning/weight loss

5 - I was, and still am, meh. It's really hard but I've learnt to accept the uncertainty and know it will pass.

Utterly exhausted and totally lacklustre for the last 10 days. Period was 5 days late, suspect that's not helped...

I completely empathise and feel very much similar, especially wanting to not do anything and live simply! I manage by doing just that for one evening a week! And (perhaps this isn't such a good idea) lots of cake! And walking/exercising, nearly everyday. Also, I'm finding watching daft comedies really helps life my mood!

F£&k that