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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed of with this re sleeping arrangements?

408 replies

shestakingtheurine · 26/05/2023 22:20

I'm going to a friends hen do at the end of June. I have known this friend since I was at secondary school so we have developed different friends over the years so I'm only vaguely familiar with the other ladies going. The maid of honour has done all the booking and is now asking for the money for the accommodation she's booked except she's sent link to the air bnb she has booked and it's only got three bedrooms and three double beds for seven people. I questioned this if she had made a mistake or are we supposed to be sharing beds and she said yes. Aibu to not want to share a bed with a virtual stranger? Would you pay up or back out? I feel like I've been put in a difficult position now as if I don't pay the others price will go up so I can't even find my own accommodation. I honestly feel sick.

OP posts:
adrem · 28/05/2023 20:46

The moh hasn’t thought this through at all.
Plus where does person number 7 sleep.

Why didn’t moh ask you all if the sleeping arrangements were ok. Seems a bit rude as you’re paying.

Plipplopdrop · 28/05/2023 20:52

Can you not just do a "hen night" for you and your friend another time? Make some excuse as to why you can't go to this one (tbh, I'd have backed out for not knowing the others - but I'm pretty antisocial) and then make up for it by taking the bride out for a nice dinner and overnight somewhere another time
You'll not be forced to do shit activities, share a bed and put up with MOH who sounds like a right PITA

lurchermummy · 28/05/2023 20:54

I'd share with a good friend but this...no

DGay · 28/05/2023 20:55

shestakingtheurine · 26/05/2023 22:24

I don't even know where the 7th person is going to sleep 😬

Probably the sofa. I wouldn't share a room with someone I don't know or sleep on the sofa.

Waitresstime · 28/05/2023 21:11

I would definitely back out !!

ASGIRC · 28/05/2023 21:33

Hollyppp · 28/05/2023 20:01

I wondered that too. I presume people are worried about other people touching them or farting in their sleep?!

Show quote history

I understand not wanting to share a bed with a random stranger of the opposite sex.

But a friend of a friend of the same sex? There for the same activity?

It wouldn't phase me at all.

Cosyblankets · 28/05/2023 21:38

I've just been away with a friend I've known for more than 30 years but we didn't share a bed.
I bet you're not the only one not happy

PixieLaLa · 28/05/2023 21:41

Yer fuck that, I would cancel and maybe just got to the activities/a night out?

Lambstails · 28/05/2023 21:47

Oh dear bananas...NOOOO!

Imagine if a sneaky trump popped out on the stranger's leg? The mortification doesn't bear thinking about. Then there's the morning breath issue, it's bad enough from someone you love dearly, but having last night's gin and doner kebab huffed all over you courtesy of someone you don't even know? 😳😳

Lesina · 28/05/2023 21:53

Back out. It’s weird. Just no

Haveallthesongsbeenwritten · 28/05/2023 21:54

shestakingtheurine · 26/05/2023 22:22

I'm paying 200 pound to share a fucking bed .

Yeah no chance that’s weird

Crayfishforyou · 28/05/2023 21:57

Does the bride know she will be sharing a bed?

Hollyppp · 28/05/2023 22:18

ASGIRC · 28/05/2023 21:33

I understand not wanting to share a bed with a random stranger of the opposite sex.

But a friend of a friend of the same sex? There for the same activity?

It wouldn't phase me at all.

Show quote history

Yes I completely agree. This isn’t some random old man off the street. It’s a friend of a friend so it would be likely you have some mutual ground and they aren’t some sort of monster!!

I think I would understand more if it was opposite sex but another woman who comes from your sort of circle is hardly some random scary stranger

Waterbottleallthetime · 28/05/2023 23:06

Nope. Sharing a bed is gross.

Waterbottleallthetime · 28/05/2023 23:10

Correction to my previous post. I would not share a room with people I do know let alone people I don’t know. The only people I share my bed with are my cats. So no, I definitely wouldn’t go and no one in their right mind would blame you for declining.

Ginger1982 · 28/05/2023 23:15

I went to a hen weekend years ago and had to bed share with the bride. The MOH did ask if we were ok with this and I said ok as I didn't want to be a killjoy, but I didn't enjoy it and wouldn't agree to it again.

CelestiaNoctis · 28/05/2023 23:51

Nah, find available accommodation nearby then message to say that's what you're gonna do instead. I've always hated even sharing a room with someone else I know well. I can't imagine sharing a bed with someone I don't know.

T1Dmama · 29/05/2023 01:23

Share a double but take a sleeping bag ?
Id be cross too and I’d tell her to sleep on the fkn air bed!!

Itallsucksnowdoesntit · 29/05/2023 01:55

I wouldn't go. I would only share a bed with my hubby, kids or sisters. Not even my best friend.

ClareBlue · 29/05/2023 02:14

shestakingtheurine · 26/05/2023 23:07

She keeps going on about ordering fucking matching pyjamas and I'm like erm we haven't even all got somewhere to sleep!

I sympathise as I wouldn't really want to even share a room and no way a bed.
But this does create a funny image of you all sitting on the beds in matching Pj's deciding which of the people you don't even know you want to share your bed with.
Sorry, it's just funny. How were beds to be allocated?

RachaelN · 29/05/2023 07:41

I would only share a bed with people I know if we were both comfortable doing it. My friend and I are sharing a double bed next year for one night and it was agreed prior to booking.
Yanbu at all. I wouldn't be happy either!

momtoboys · 29/05/2023 08:27

No way would I share a bed with someone I don’t know.

Pickpocket · 29/05/2023 09:12

I’ve had to do this in the past, it was very uncomfortable and awkward and barely slept at all! But I put up with it as the hen was a good friend and it was only a couple of nights…. 😏

RampantIvy · 29/05/2023 09:15

I'm not worried about what the other person might do. I just can't relax when sharing. The company I work for always made us share rooms (not beds) on business trips, and I could never sleep.

juless77 · 29/05/2023 09:16

Back out I don't share a Bed with my lovely hubby so wouldn't share a bed with a practical stranger .....

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