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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be pissed of with this re sleeping arrangements?

408 replies

shestakingtheurine · 26/05/2023 22:20

I'm going to a friends hen do at the end of June. I have known this friend since I was at secondary school so we have developed different friends over the years so I'm only vaguely familiar with the other ladies going. The maid of honour has done all the booking and is now asking for the money for the accommodation she's booked except she's sent link to the air bnb she has booked and it's only got three bedrooms and three double beds for seven people. I questioned this if she had made a mistake or are we supposed to be sharing beds and she said yes. Aibu to not want to share a bed with a virtual stranger? Would you pay up or back out? I feel like I've been put in a difficult position now as if I don't pay the others price will go up so I can't even find my own accommodation. I honestly feel sick.

OP posts:
Confusion101 · 27/05/2023 20:43

shestakingtheurine · 27/05/2023 20:05

They don't all know each other! One is a family member, one a school friend, one an old neighbour and one a university friend. I'm sure I'm not the only one who is unhappy but I'm the only one who is speaking up frustratingly.

A hen I was at recently had 22 guests, involved sharing beds and / or rooms with people who didn't know each other and involved people sleeping on daybeds... 1 person complained! So you can't be sure you aren't the only one unhappy.

CheeseAndOlives · 27/05/2023 22:32

Maybe theres a sofa bed you can grab op? Bring a duvet & pillow!

NoraBattysCurlers · 27/05/2023 22:36

Confusion101 · 27/05/2023 20:43

A hen I was at recently had 22 guests, involved sharing beds and / or rooms with people who didn't know each other and involved people sleeping on daybeds... 1 person complained! So you can't be sure you aren't the only one unhappy.

Show quote history

It's typical of hen parties. Hen parties may not be my cup of tea but this is what hen parties are about. What else did the OP expect when she agreed to go on the hen.

Whatever next? A post at the end of June where OP will complain that the other six got drunk and she didn't sleep a wink.

RampantIvy · 27/05/2023 23:09

The afternoon tea hen party I will be going to later on this year sounds rather more civilised tame in comparison.

sunsetoranges · 27/05/2023 23:45

Sounds a nightmare.

BungleandGeorge · 27/05/2023 23:54

I’ve done this, i think it’s pretty normal for hen dos. After a few drinks most people don’t really care. Most accommodation doesn’t have all twin beds. £680 for a 3 bed cottage rental for the weekend isn’t a lot.

Maloneyb · 28/05/2023 02:33

NoraBattysCurlers · 27/05/2023 22:36

It's typical of hen parties. Hen parties may not be my cup of tea but this is what hen parties are about. What else did the OP expect when she agreed to go on the hen.

Whatever next? A post at the end of June where OP will complain that the other six got drunk and she didn't sleep a wink.

Show quote history

Erm not necessarily
move organised a hen this year for my best friend and the beds are single beds so no one has to share. Not really hard to accommodate people.

Busybutbored · 28/05/2023 03:34

BungleandGeorge · 27/05/2023 23:54

I’ve done this, i think it’s pretty normal for hen dos. After a few drinks most people don’t really care. Most accommodation doesn’t have all twin beds. £680 for a 3 bed cottage rental for the weekend isn’t a lot.

Disagree. Sharing a bed with strangers is really not a thing after about age 25ish if you have a decent job and would rather pay more money not to!

GuitarsUnderTheStars · 28/05/2023 04:39

Disagree. Sharing a bed with strangers is really not a thing after about age 25ish if you have a decent job and would rather pay more money not to!

Exactly. All the hen do weekends/holidays I’ve been on have been at really nice accommodation. Having you own bed is the very basics.

GuitarsUnderTheStars · 28/05/2023 04:39

*your

Busybutbored · 28/05/2023 05:30

GuitarsUnderTheStars · 28/05/2023 04:39

Disagree. Sharing a bed with strangers is really not a thing after about age 25ish if you have a decent job and would rather pay more money not to!

Exactly. All the hen do weekends/holidays I’ve been on have been at really nice accommodation. Having you own bed is the very basics.

Totally. I've been on loads of trips and only shared once and that was by choice as we wanted to stay up for a bit longer and chat together

Confusion101 · 28/05/2023 09:54

Busybutbored · 28/05/2023 03:34

Disagree. Sharing a bed with strangers is really not a thing after about age 25ish if you have a decent job and would rather pay more money not to!

Show quote history

🤣🤣🤣 OK then!

Blondeshavemorefun · 28/05/2023 10:43

Def say to hen the place is 3 doubles and there are 7 of us

You don't have to say location. It's not spoiling anything

I'm glad I too mr he simple approach

Afternoon cream tea with bubbly for those who wanted it - think was 24/26 of us

Plus drinks in evening after with my close best friends 6 of us

And all local so no hassle getting there or taxis home for those who drunk

Argar · 28/05/2023 11:51

Well, you can take an airbed, but don't be surprised if one of you finds herself scrabbling around for a hotel when the owner/manager says it's six only... I can't believe the CFery of people booking a property for a certain number, then turning up with extras.

JT12 · 28/05/2023 17:43

No way! So weird to expect adults to share a bed with people they don’t know. I definitely wouldn’t do it. Decidedly odd 😳

Rosscameasdoody · 28/05/2023 17:44

No. I wouldn’t share a bed - as someone upthread pointed out, you’re not teenagers and you don’t know any of these people well. I’d back out and not feel guilty - if the bride asks why, you need to be honest.

Stirling2701 · 28/05/2023 17:56

I wouldn't go. There is no way I could share a double bed with a total stranger.

Stirling2701 · 28/05/2023 17:57

Definitely cancel. I would feel sick too.

Whammyyammy · 28/05/2023 18:10

I'd book my own accommodation and tell her you'll not be paying towards this airbnb, if not you won't be going

Ilovecleaning · 28/05/2023 18:12

YANBU. I hate being bossed like this. Just bow out.

PriamFarrl · 28/05/2023 18:14

I would be noping the fuck out of that. Matching pyjamas is bad enough!

When I was younger I shared beds with friends all the time, especially as a student. Now I’m old it’s me and the cat, the husband might get a look in sometimes.

Ilovecleaning · 28/05/2023 18:14

… you’re grown women, not 12 year olds. And I bet the woman who has organised this will be sharing with a close friend.

Iwant2stayanon · 28/05/2023 18:15

I would want my own room/bed/bathroom/private space. No chance I would share a bed with a stranger, it’s not bloody school! I would back out.

luckylavender · 28/05/2023 18:16

My BF booked a weekend away for me for a big birthday & didn't tell me until we arrived that we had a double bed. Wasn't happy at all.

Spottycarousel · 28/05/2023 18:20

Your friend is massively taking the pee. I can't believe she even consider that acceptable without checking first.

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