Giving out wedding invites at another wedding

[Cookingmama12]

I live in Austria, and will get married here. The majority of the rest of my big family are in the UK, and a few scattered across Europe the only time either side get together is a wedding or funeral. In my culture normally out of respect you would visit your elders to give them their invites - I am the youngest of the family so this would have meant visiting everyone (about 35 households), however we were only in the UK for a long weekend, and the next time we return it would be only 3 months before my wedding. My cousin got married, and my intention was to give invites at the very end to the people living in the EU, and I would post the rest to the ones living in the UK.
About 40mins before the end of the wedding I approached one of my aunt's who doesn't live in the UK, knelt beside her and explained that I wanted to give her my wedding invite as I will not see her. She was next to my other Aunt who does live in the UK, and she asked for her invite too. I said I would post hers, and her children's invites too, but she said to save the postage and to give her a headstart on planning she would like hers now. So I give her hers and ones for her children too.
I gave my uncle one who also doesn't live in the UK one and sat down. When it was time to leave, I said goodbye to everyone individually as we were not going to see them for a while and my 2 other aunts and a few cousins also asked for their invites too rather than posting them. I gave it to them, and everyone from my mum's side had received their invites bar my cousin whose wedding it was and her parents. I would post these to them to avoid disturbing them.
However now the mother of the bride said I completely hijacked the evening, and it was really rude of me to do this. The wedding had been a whole day thing (11am til 11pm), and it was not my intention to attract any attention at all. For reference there were about 350 people at the wedding, and I only spoke to and gave 8 people invites (some of them multiple to give to their children) at the end of the wedding. If this was to happen at my own wedding I really don't think I would mind - it would be the next exciting thing to look forward to and when my family would get together. Was I unreasonable?

I think it is rather bad form but it doesn't sound like you drew attention to it so it seems unfair to say you hijacked the wedding.
I've been to a wedding where the best man proposed to his girlfriend over the mic after the first dance! Now that's hijacking a wedding!

I would not have been able to go to 35 people's houses to drop them off in 1 day as I was leaving the day after. The only reason it was handed to more than the 2 people I intended to initially wanted to give them to was only because people were asking for them, and by that point people were leaving and it was the end of the wedding. Like people had coats and bags on and were just saying bye to each other.

The bride has not said anything to me about it, and is also not acting any differently towards me.

Quite rude I think. As if you were saying yours might be better. That may not be what you intended but that's how it would have come across to me. It's nicer getting things in the post anyway.

I think it's rude.

Not rude at all.ignore the woman.You were being practical.
Have a wonderful wedding ,will be so beautiful in Austria.💐

My mum actually said to give everyone their invites at the wedding, but I said I would only do my Aunt and Uncle who do not live in the UK

If that was the "worst thing that went wrong" at their wedding they should be thankful.
If you could be bothered, explain your reasoning but I wouldn't. The world seems to be full of people looking for reasons to be passed off to me!

Just message the bride, thank her for the lovely day. Briefly say her mum mentioned about the invites and hope you didn't offend as that wasn't at all the intention. Then move on

I think it’s fine but some people on here clearly don’t think it was the right move. For those of you that think OP was rude, do you think it warranted the MIL having a go at OP? At worst, it was maybe a bit of a faux pas that might niggle you for a minute before you forgot about it. I can’t understand anyone being so annoyed at the OP that they’d say something about it.

I don't think it was the end of the world personally, but not good form.

That is so tacky

I think it's rude personally. Reading this made me cringe a bit😬

I don't think it is terrible, family talk past and present weddings when they get together after all- but I do think I would have sent a message to the bride asking if she minded, and mentioning that I'd keep it quiet/not try to detract from her day. Just feels polite and respectful of the energy and money the couple put into their big day.

Agree!

I think it was really rude

I think it was weird you had them all there but I wouldn't get upset if it was my wedding. They're being dramatic

This wouldn’t have bothered me in the slightest if someone did this at my wedding. Presumably you handed an envelope to them and it went straight in their bag. Total non-issue.

It's not great, I find it a bit odd that people were asking for their invitations, who asks for an invitation?!

Not the end of the world though.

Wouldn’t have bothered me at all.

I agree with this.

I was at a wedding a few weeks back in which I was given the invite for another upcoming wedding. I said thanks and poped it in my bag and got back to the day.

Less than 5 seconds, out of a 10+hr day.

You were rude

At a wedding, it's the bride and groom's day

Dishing out your own invitations is a bit like wearing white at the wedding

I think it was a bit out of order. 'Hijacked the wedding' is a bit dramatic, but it was certainly tacky.

My sister announced her own engagement the night before our cousin's wedding!

I don't see anything wrong with this. She never did it on the wedding day

Is it the worse thing you could have done? No.
Would it completely have ruined their day? No.
Was it still a little rude to do? Yes.

You say you intended to post them all, except for your aunt/uncle who live outside the UK. I assume they also stayed over (in the UK) the night of the wedding? Could you not have popped over to where they were staying the next morning, before you all left, and given it given to them then?

I don't understand why you would have needed to go round and visit 35 people the next day, if you were planning to post them anyway? Just visit the two who don't live in the UK, and post the rest as planned.

If it was a cultural norm to just post invitations I'd say definitely rude but where delivering in person is normal surely that's different. What's the norm for when you can't visit in person?