To not let other people feed my FF baby?

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MIL especially is always angling to do it under the guise of being helpful when but not helpful like change a nappy, make a cup of tea or take out rubbish etc.

If I had been able to breastfeed, then it would always be me and I really love doing it.

Didn’t they already have a turn when they had kids?

Posting here was a bad idea, as you’ve come in for a bunch of criticism. Please ignore it all.

Your baby your choice, and your feelings are valid. That’s all there is to it, really.

I breastfed and let others feed with a bottle, I suppose I was lucky they took a bottle! I really loved seeing my family feed my baby. My MIL is amazing, she brought round fillet steak and vegetables as I was a bit anaemic after the birth (and a bottle of champagne!), and also babysits when I work. I love the bond they have together.

I think you are completely reasonable in this. When the baby is older it will be different.

You do you and don't feel bad! I really wanted to breastfeed my first but couldn't get enough milk into him. Was really upset to introduce formula at the hospital's insistence as it felt like failure to my hormone addled brain. I mix fed until he weaned and never let anyone else feed him as I wanted to be the one providing the food like I would have been if ebf. I knew at the time it was silly but it made me feel better and I don't regret it.

Your baby, you decide who feed the baby. It’s that simple!

My baby is 5 months now but both midwives I saw said try to limit bottle feeding to mum and dad. I really don't see why so many posters have a problem with that or why they are making out you are being OTT! I chose to allow people to feed my baby after about a month as I wanted a rest but you are well within your right to not all. Babies can bond with grandparents in different ways. You wouldn't stick baby on grandmas tits if you were breastfeeding!

I actually can't believe anyone would be so mean and not let a Grandparent feed their Grandchildren a bottle.

@PinkyFlamingo

I must be the antichrist then cause I didn't!

Nobody suggests taking a newborn baby bear from its Mama bear. It’s totally fine if you want to do all the feeding. Feelings about breastfeeding or not can be very powerful. It’s your baby - no one is being harmed by whichever choice you make over this. There is plenty of time for family to have a relationship as your baby gets older. It’s easier then. I had a third baby because I still wanted to nurture a baby. I don’t plan to make any of my grandchildren another baby for me. I will be just as happy sitting across the room coping and helping my child and their partner.

Oh and if my son and soon to be born baby ever have kids I won't have a fucking obsession with giving them a bloody bottle.
I know I'm over reacting because I'm pregnant and hormonal but this thread is giving me the rage 😂😂😂

You free her, you birthed her. You have every right to not want anyone else to feed her if that's what you wish!

I don't think it's 'mean' grandparents don't have automatic rights to a grandchild.

Has your baby got tongue tie? If they haven't you might want to change bottle/teats at 9 weeks they should've grasped their latch if they're bottle fed.

Your words not mine. Sounds like you are projecting and like you are the one who in fact needs to 'get a grip'.

I breastfed both of my kids. But let the GPs and DH have a turn with ebm sometimes.

@Justalittlebitduckling

It's not the same.

It’s the usual theme of MIL being damned if she does help, damned if she doesn’t. Of course mum’s parents are more helpful, most mothers are quite comfortable pottering around daughter’s house doing bits and pieces after a new baby. If MIL does it, she’s interfering. I think my dil and have a great relationship, but I always ask before I pitch in. It’s her space.

I do find the feeding thing weird and a bit unkind though. Mine were fed by any visitor who expressed a wish to do so. My children didn’t seem to have any bonding issues.

Think your midwife was out of order.
What about all those babies stuck in Special Care.
I had twins. One with me the other in special care and whilst they fed him my breast milk I didn’t do it myself.

Never had any bonding issues.

It’s a very sad piece of advice for parents who don’t have this luxury and…..well…..nonsense

@Fandabedodgy

Ah you said unfair not selfish. I apologise 😂.
Tried expressing, it didn't work for me. So should I have let mil use formula to be "fair"?

Your baby your choice.

@NeverWasAMum your sister probably loved watching you feed her babies.
Watching my twin sister feed my daughter was the best.
I can still relate to the original poster. I think it’s different if one person asks to feed the baby and looks genuinely happy
compared to when someone insists , repeatedly insists ‘I will help you, no no, I will feed them’ and ignore you saying no thank you.

@JustBeKindItsEasy Agree.
My twins were in the NICU and fed by NICU nurses and when we went to TCU a midwife would always come round at feeding time and feed one of the twins whilst I was feeding the other as they had latching issues. Didn't affect their bonding!

This comments is unnecessary.

In Op's case, MIL was passing comments on her inability to BF, and despite her C section, they never offered any support.

I always found feeding my baby was a bonding experience. You should let your DH feed sometimes too but you don't have to let mil if you don't want too.

It's not the same though is it.

And Im not looking to get drawn into hypothetical arguments.

You did post this in AIBU! Yes, I think you are. Feeding a baby is a lovely thing to do. I'd let her. Take the opportunity to have a bath or go for a walk or mix a jug of cocktails or something.