To tell new lad this is my room

[Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy]

I know this is ridiculous but its really pissing me off Iv just started seeing someone new and he's been staying over and everything has been going great except I like to sleep with a fan on, the landing light on and the TV or something on my phone for background noise. he hates the fan and tv/phone being on he wants complete darkness and silence and wants to sleep with the window open. Aibu to tell him it's my room so it's tough 💩 how he likes to sleep.

Iv been denied access to my daughter because he's a dickhead and social workers are corrupt in this country no other reas9n

You're not able to protect yourself, let alone your kids.

Exactly. Why not take some time out to work on yourself before seeking romantic/sexual partners, OP? Nothing good can come of lurching from one unsafe situation to the next. It's a self-destructive urge and your children will certainly be negatively affected, no matter what you tell yourself.

@gokarting

Honest apologies. I can now understand how you couldn't forget this poster...

Do you get to see your daughter now?

It's all good. I appreciated you defending OP too xx maybe I shouldn't have brought it all up on here and instead DMed her

Can I ask this gently, but is this what you truly believe or is if bravado?

I'm allowed to see my eldest my youngest im no longer allowed overnights and can only see her when it's supervised

I believe it didn't have to get this far

Do you feel there is a better way to go about this than casual sex? It just doesn’t seem to be something that’s working for you. Casual sex with different men is totally fine if you can manage than emotionally but from your threads it does not seem this is the case.

do you feel there are other ways to form a romantic relationship before sex is part of it?

Ok. I will be honest, it’s rare anyone who is in your situation feels it did.

It's not real life is it though if a lad is coming round or you go on a date their gonna want sex at the end of it. Real life isn't like a film where you kiss goodnight on the doorstep

Dear God I last saw this thread on page 1 and I did not expect it to go this way. OP, have you truly no idea at all why your parenting is being questioned, when you are bringing random men you barely know into your (their) home and, in your words, "shagging" then whilst deluding yourself that your children don't know exactly what is happening and that they are not "friends"?

I’m afraid that is real life op. For millions of women.

I agree that if you invite someone round or go to theirs it is likely they feel it is purely for sex. But if you go on dates. Meet on mutual ground. Then no sex is not an expectation or entitlement. And if you’re with an arsehole who thinks it is, then more reason to steer clear.

They might want it, doesn't mean they have to get it. Not if there are children at home

I love my girls more then anything un this world and I would literally die for them. I'm not gonna except anyone telling me their not safe with me

Of course it is like that in real life if that’s what people want. I didn’t sleep with DP for about the first month that we were together and now we’ve been together for 7 years. You don’t have to have sex every time you have a date or let a guy come round. Don’t feel pressured into it.

Ok so what steps are you taking to change that, to make the authorities think they are safe with you?

It’s not about you. And attacking the op isn’t going to help.

This!

When SS told my ex he couldn't see our son unsupervised because he was arrested for having child abuses images of toddlers, he and his family were dumbfounded at how unfair it was, called the legal system, the police, social services and myself a bunch of dirty bastards.

They may want sex but that doesn't mean you do. If all you want is a kiss good night, you have every right to say so. And that's where things should end. Honestly, you seem to have such low self-esteem and no notion of how to take care of yourself. It's entirely understandable given what you have revealed about your history. But you deserve so much more.

The past few months have been disastrous based on your threads. Why not take a step back and really work on your mental health, self-esteem, and building positive relationships with your children?

Iv started to cut down on drinking. I no longer take any non prescribed drugs. I'm cooperating with mental health services and social services. Iv not been arrested in ages. Also apart from a recent 136 I haven't been sectioned in ages. I genuinely am doing better

Fucking hell. Hopefully SS will step in and remove your eldest too.

Sleep deprivation is used as a form of torture because that is exactly what it is!

Why you know nothing about me and I have a good co parenting relationship with her dad

It's a hallway light and I have a timer on TV and fan don't be so dramatic