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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I ruining the holiday?

461 replies

jasmine92 · 15/05/2023 10:14

DP has not said as much but I just feel bad.

We spent a lot of money on a much needed holiday as we’ve been super stressed - we booked a really remote, hot location with the plan being nothing but sunbathing.
We’ve got here and it’s freezing cold, and it’s expected to be until we leave. I feel gutted because a) we spent a lot of money, b) there’s literally nothing else to do and c) he suggested other locations that I said no to because I have been before, and I should’ve gone for them as they’re really hot right now.

I keep mentioning the weather, DP keeps telling me to “make the most of it”, “it’s done now”, “it’s out of our control” etc but I just hate being cold and there’s literally nothing else to do. He told me off for looking at the weather and told me not to look again. But I just am so annoyed. Also gutted as I packed only dresses.

Also, I really wanted a holiday for us to just get away from everything as we’ve been so stressed. I said let’s just put our phones down for the week, and let’s not talk about anything going on at home that’s stressful, and let’s talk about different stuff, but he keeps scrolling each time I even walk 2 metres away. He said I put too much pressure on the holiday by saying this.
I then got upset during breakfast as he wasn’t really saying much and he said he felt pressured to make conversation. He also said he’d had 3 hours sleep and I wasn’t being understanding.

I just feel like a misery guts but I can’t help but be upset, and I don’t feel like he’s understanding. Am I unreasonable?

OP posts:
SleepingStandingUp · 15/05/2023 16:50

randomchap · 15/05/2023 16:49

I don't know why people are responding, OP isn't going to come back.

She's just too cold to type

EdinaMonsoon · 15/05/2023 17:00

I live on an island in the Southern Aegean & even down here it has been unseasonably cold & rainy since April. I don’t know what weather app you were using OP prior to packing for your trip but it clearly wasn’t accurate. But whatever, you need to accept the situation & make the best of it. I do understand that you feel disappointed and it’s gutting when you have looked forward to & spent a lot of money on a holiday.

Layer up & get outside. You’ll be able to find light weight jackets & hoodies or jumpers on sale somewhere locally I’m sure. Even when it’s been 14 degrees & cloudy I can still enjoy a walk on the beach, or find a sheltered spot to read, as long as I’m wearing enough clothes! But honestly unless you’re very far north, Greece is not freezing right now!

If you feel comfortable sharing approximately where you are then I’m sure we could make suggestions for places to visit. Every island has its share of museums, historical sites etc. Take a bus to an inland village and get lost wandering the streets away from the main road & see how people really live. Go lose an hour having coffee & chatting with your DP - choose the cafe that has mostly locals rather than tourists: it’ll be cheaper & better! Look up local outdoor cinemas - they often show films indoors in May. It’s usually a lovely cosy experience, sitting on sofas rather than cinema seats. Live music events? Churches? Walking trails? Lazy lunches & dinners.

nidgey · 15/05/2023 17:09

jasmine92 · 15/05/2023 10:25

We’re in Greece but the weather said it was gonna be scorching and it changed last minute. We looked at hiring a car but it’s extortionate.
Our plans were beaches, books, sun etc but we can’t do any of it

You need mobility - you can usually rent a scooter for fairly cheap in Greece - can you do that? And buy a tracksuit or something warm? Turn it into a funny adventure - a change is as good as a rest as they say and if you can at least travel around, then that's better than feeling so stuck.

YourFault · 15/05/2023 17:12

You’re being unreasonable, should’ve checked the weather before you left.

nidgey · 15/05/2023 17:14

HappiDaze · 15/05/2023 16:49

Yes you're ruining the holiday and probably to such an extent you may well find yourself holidaying alone next year

Oh please - voice of doom is hardly helping. The OP says they've had a really stressful time so a lot of posters need to back off and actually be constructive

Peridot1 · 15/05/2023 17:18

Some of the comments on here are really nasty and uncalled for.

SoSo99 · 15/05/2023 17:18

I remember a colleague of mine booked a holiday with her boyfriend to the Canaries to get some sun....but they ended up experiencing the worst weather ever known in the region. No heating and not enough bedding...they were so cold they took to driving round in a hire car to keep warm. Her relationship was a bit rocky, so I thought this might have triggered a decline. Turned out they bonded over the situation and had a laugh and somehow it ended up being an OK break.

Though I do get how shit it is when reality doesn't match expectations

WisherWood · 15/05/2023 17:21

You’ll be able to find light weight jackets & hoodies or jumpers on sale somewhere locally I’m sure.

Or ask the hotel if there are any in unclaimed lost property.

Honestly OP, I'd love a week away somewhere with my DP, whatever the weather. You're not at work. You've got somewhere new to explore. Apologise to him and make the most of what you have got.

LongLostTeacher · 15/05/2023 17:23

That’s rubbish, OP, what a shame. I’d be gutted too.

I would give yourself a few hours/an evening to feel your disappointment and be annoyed and sad about your bad luck. Then make a plan for the next few days. You need to realign your expectations with the current weather.

I’ve never been to Greece, but I’m sure there are still beautiful places to see, lovely food to eat and relaxation to be had. Granted, the relaxation will not be what you imagined, but going and doing new things and seeing sights or different walks is another way to relax. If you need warmer clothes, that’s an excuse to go shopping! I would be tempted to hire a car, even if it’s expensive, as it will let you do so much more.

Good luck, I hope you end up having a brilliant time.

EerieSilence · 15/05/2023 17:29

Get yourself a warm jumper and jeans or tracksuit bottoms, even Greece have the likes of H&M or Zara. Take walks on the beach. Go to a restaurant and have a good meal. Chill - mentally. And enjoy.

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 15/05/2023 19:07

DH and I have been to both Portugal when it was cold and Crete when it was cool and rainy….we had the best time just wandering around and sight seeing.

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 15/05/2023 19:07

Therefore you are being a moany bastard

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2023 19:47

JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam · 15/05/2023 19:07

DH and I have been to both Portugal when it was cold and Crete when it was cool and rainy….we had the best time just wandering around and sight seeing.

@JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam

and? Good for you. Do you wanna medal?!

op wanted hot weather on her hol. Hardly crime of the century.

Pipsquiggle · 15/05/2023 20:28

LuckySantangelo35 · 15/05/2023 19:47

@JoshLymanIsHotterThanSam

and? Good for you. Do you wanna medal?!

op wanted hot weather on her hol. Hardly crime of the century.

Show quote history

@LuckySantangelo35

If she wanted guaranteed hot OP shouldn't have booked a European destination in May.

She's moaning about something of her own making when she just should get on and count her blessings

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 15/05/2023 21:00

SleepingStandingUp · 15/05/2023 16:47

Artic weather's in Greece? Missed that on the news

Show quote history

Greece had snow last week, I'd call that artic. Plus 20c is not beach weather. It is pleasant sightseeing weather but not sea and sunbathing (and why I wouldn't do Europe for a beach holiday in may)

ThereIbledit · 15/05/2023 21:37

@LuckySantangelo35 The post you were replying to was giving an example of how a cool weather holiday could be enjoyable.

What was the point in your reply to them, other than to snark?

Ibizamumof4 · 15/05/2023 21:46

I would be the same so completely get you. I have had cold spells on holidays to be honest I would just get pissed and read

DangerousAlchemy · 15/05/2023 21:54

Oh dear, OP didn't get the response she was hoping for did she?- hopefully she's bought a jumper, found a good book & is sipping a cocktail now whilst apologising to her DH for being moody about the weather 🤣👏

Talkwhilstyouwalk · 15/05/2023 21:58

You can't buy good weather....

So here are some other ideas:
Walks on the beach
Island hopping on the ferry
Eat local food
Rent a car
Drink alcohol
Have sex

weirdoboelady · 15/05/2023 21:59

You have my sympathies about the weather. So you are stuck in Greece in cold weather. This is the point at which you can either mope, or make the best of it. Hoping you choose the latter, here are some suggestions.

  • find out about local transport. You don't need to hire a car - go off and have an adventure!
  • explore the local restaurants
  • read
  • do you speak any Greek? Buy a cheap phrase book and see how far you can get trying to communicate with locals (or you can cheat and use a translation app, but the first suggestion is more fun, with the second as a backup)
  • see if you can find any local markets
  • ask people on social media for any recommendations in the locality you are in.

Come on, brace up - this is your chance to show strength of character and creativity, and with any luck you will find something really magical in this holiday.

3luckystars · 15/05/2023 22:05

Things must have picked up.

Pyui · 15/05/2023 22:05

If it was a rainy or grey day on holiday before we had kids, DH and I would laze, eat, drink rum, read books and shag. It was really relaxing.

One rainy day in Italy we went on a pasta crawl- it was great.

I get it’s disappointing but sometimes it’s when I’d have the most fun and feel most connected to DH.

Notellinganyone · 15/05/2023 22:06

jasmine92 · 15/05/2023 10:25

We’re in Greece but the weather said it was gonna be scorching and it changed last minute. We looked at hiring a car but it’s extortionate.
Our plans were beaches, books, sun etc but we can’t do any of it

Bit late now but the weather in Greece is really only dependable from mid/late June.

Swishhh · 15/05/2023 22:11

How can there be nothing to do in Greece?

CabernetSauvignon · 15/05/2023 22:13

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 15/05/2023 21:00

Greece had snow last week, I'd call that artic. Plus 20c is not beach weather. It is pleasant sightseeing weather but not sea and sunbathing (and why I wouldn't do Europe for a beach holiday in may)

Show quote history

Articulated weather? WTF?