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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would DH be unreasonable to wear a short suit to a wedding?

253 replies

toastofthetown · 13/05/2023 17:42

We have a few weddings coming up this July and August. Given the very hot weather last year and that DH runs warm, he’s considering wearing a short suit if the weather is hot. We’re young, and the weddings we’ve been invited to are relaxed and casual, rather than a traditional occasion. We’re not part of the wedding party, and as DH is tall he tends to be at the back of photos. Here are some examples for styles he’s looking at. I know some of these are styled casually, but DH will be in a shirt and smart shoes. I know it’s bit left field but would be interested to see what the view is as DH is considered about sweltering in a traditional suit but also doesn’t want to go totally rogue.

Would DH be unreasonable to wear a short suit to a wedding?
Would DH be unreasonable to wear a short suit to a wedding?
OP posts:
spring78 · 14/05/2023 10:58

BIWI · 13/05/2023 17:46

No. And definitely would look ridiculous with smart shoes!

This

purplecorkheart · 14/05/2023 10:58

No, if I saw someone wearing these at a wedding however causal I would think they were attention seeking.

Comby · 14/05/2023 10:59

Why doesn't he ask them? If he's uncomfortable doing that then he should wear normal trousers. Shorts don't make you cooler anyway. He could keep ankles bare as a compromise. Linen trousers, no socks and smart loafers?

Lovemebetter · 14/05/2023 11:00

A bloke turned up at work several years ago in a suit like that and everybody ribbed him all day.

Comby · 14/05/2023 11:00

11oz or heavier Linen fabric wrinkles less if that's a worry.

CelerEtAudax · 14/05/2023 11:04

Short suits are always awful and if he wears one he'll be the guy who in years to come everyone will be pointing at in the wedding pics and going: "OMG LOOK AT HIM! WHAT DID HE THINK HE WAS WEARING!"

tonkywonky · 14/05/2023 11:41

In this day and age it's quite sad that a man can be mocked for wearing a cooler (temperature wise) suit that makes him feel more comfortable. Why can women wear dresses and skirts but a man not be allowed short sleeved shirts or shorts without being mocked?

I've seen these suits at beach weddings and wouldn't bat an eye. Although due to society's backwards view on short suits he probably can't get away with one without being mocked or judged if it wasn't a beach wedding.

KimberleyClark · 14/05/2023 11:44

tonkywonky · 14/05/2023 11:41

In this day and age it's quite sad that a man can be mocked for wearing a cooler (temperature wise) suit that makes him feel more comfortable. Why can women wear dresses and skirts but a man not be allowed short sleeved shirts or shorts without being mocked?

I've seen these suits at beach weddings and wouldn't bat an eye. Although due to society's backwards view on short suits he probably can't get away with one without being mocked or judged if it wasn't a beach wedding.

Has anyone said men shouldn’t be allowed to wear short sleeved shirts?

Comby · 14/05/2023 11:44

Women's dress is mocked, a lot of women dress inappropriately or look awful. It's spoken about all the time. If anything, men get a pass.

MargaretThursday · 14/05/2023 11:51

Ds would love that. The last wedding he went to (and looked gorgeous in a suit) he stated that if he ever gets married the dress code will be shorts and t-shirt.

He is only 15 now, and was only 8yo at the time, however he's stick by that. When I said his partner may want a say he said "if they're marrying me they'll know to say shorts".
I will laugh (quietly) if he falls head over heals and agrees to wear top hat and tails.

CanofCant · 14/05/2023 11:55

Comby · 14/05/2023 11:44

Women's dress is mocked, a lot of women dress inappropriately or look awful. It's spoken about all the time. If anything, men get a pass.

Yeah, getting sick of the tiny violins tbh.

StripeyDeckchair · 14/05/2023 11:59

Chinos, smart shirt & a blazer would be ok & smart in the heat (it can even be a short sleeved shirt, the blazer comes off after the photos) but a shorts suit would make him look like an overgrown 3 year old.

midgemadgemodge · 14/05/2023 12:01

Comby · 14/05/2023 11:44

Women's dress is mocked, a lot of women dress inappropriately or look awful. It's spoken about all the time. If anything, men get a pass.

Nope women and men both get mocked equally for stepping out of line

It's horrid in both cases

TheApplianceofScience · 14/05/2023 12:07

I haven’t RTFT, too long, but two things linen creases like buggery and when the jacket comes off, it is just a pair of shorts and a shirt or T-shirt. Not really smart enough unless the wedding is on a white sandy beach somewhere.

olympicsrock · 14/05/2023 12:26

I like them - fine if he is 20s or 30s with toned tanned legs and a relaxed wedding . Amazed at some of the nos.

DurhamDurham · 14/05/2023 12:31

I think this would only ever be suitable if the wedding was abroad in a sunnier climate. We got married in Cyprus, a v causal affair and my husband wore smart shorts but I've never seen anyone at a wedding in this country do this. It would look so out of place, especially with smart shoes.

Original poster
toastofthetown · 14/05/2023 13:19

Honestly, this thread is largely what I expected when I started it. I think it’s a shame that I can wear a light floaty dress and be nice and cool, whereas my husband has very little choice in what’s socially acceptable. I wonder how much this will change going forward, with summers getting hotter, weddings becoming increasingly more casual and the range of wear acceptable for men expanding but I think in 2023 it’s still not ok generally.

I don’t control what my husband wears, but was just curious as to what the general opinion was on anonymous forum, as people are more likely to be honest. I also find it interesting as there’s a wider discussion about societal norms for formal dressing, aside from the fact DH likes wearing shorts!

In a straw poll of people I’ve asked IRL since starting this thread, no-one could have given a fig if there were a man wearing shorts at their wedding, and the guys have said while they’d have ribbed someone wearing shorts, they’d have been jealous too. There were guests at my wedding with hair far more attention grabbing than shorts, but I wouldn’t expect them to wear a wig to cover it.

Linen just crumples so much that by the time we’ve traveled to a wedding the suit would look dreadful before the day had even started, but I’ll look into the options suggested for linen which creases less.

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 14/05/2023 13:54

If he looks like the first model, and has a nice pedicure (he'll need to wear sandals) then yes.

Other wise wear trousers and a short sleeved shirt and just take off the jacket.

Atishoos · 14/05/2023 13:59

Not a good look for a wedding AT ALL. I would refuse to leave the house if my H wanted to wear that to a wedding we were going to.

Anyway, is he an attention seeker or what? If he wears that, all eyes and comments and attention will be on him and not on the bride. That would be unforgiveable.

Nanny0gg · 14/05/2023 14:01

And the footwear in those photos is very unsuitable for a wedding so it would possibly have to be deck shoes but still no!

Lindjam · 14/05/2023 14:05

I mean he can wear whatever he wants, but I wouldn’t go with him if he was dressed like that 😂

waterlego · 14/05/2023 14:09

Surprised some posters say they’d have been annoyed if someone came to their wedding in this. Why? I don’t think I really noticed what people wore to my wedding. I didn’t care what my guests wore as long as they were comfortable and felt good in what they were wearing.

I do think this look won’t suit a lot of men and it reminds me of an old fashioned school uniform, but I suppose you could say the same about suits generally. Just something about the shorts is somehow boyish. Having said that, I wouldn’t have cared at all if someone had worn this to my wedding.

Atishoos · 14/05/2023 14:12

Better have long trousers and a mac/brolly ready to hand, it will probably be freezing and pouring with rain anyway. OK for Bermuda but not for UK.

BelleMarionette · 14/05/2023 14:13

No! Though maybe I am old fashioned, making an effort for weddings. At mine, and a lot of ones I have been to, some people turn up looking like they are going to Tesco's.

BelleMarionette · 14/05/2023 14:14

Does he have Scottish descent? A kilt would be the only way he could get away with bare legs I think!

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