To be this upset a bully who reports me to police gatecrashed coronation street party

[HairySatsuma]

Having singlehandedly organised a street party last year for the jubilee - inc risk assessment, paying for insurance, street notices, spending £500 by the end - that was a great success I stupidly did it all again this year for the coronation. I bought most of the bunting, put it up, arranged tables/chairs/canopy, decorated the canopy, went round the whole street 4x to get everyone involved, blew up an awesome balloon display, licked paper chains to decorate, contacted neighbours to remove cars, organised music, plates etc. Same as last year only a handful of lovely neighbours helped; it was pretty much all me.

But it was 'gatecrashed' by a neighbour I didn't invite who's just moved in to my building and has caused me incredible stress and anxiety - I've recently recorded high BP for the first time in my life. He's a leaseholder, I'm a freeholder and he does whatever he wants without permission. I stopped him undertaking work in a communal area about which I knew nothing. He called the police. I asked him to remove a Ring doorbell at the communal front door he was using to spy on me (not paranoid; another neighbour confirms) and when he missed two deadlines I removed it myself, told him I had no intention of keeping it but needed written assurance he wouldn't re-install it before returning it. He called the police claiming theft. Both times the police told him I was right and he needed to apologise. But the time wasted sorting all that out and writing to him to list his many misdemeanours meant I missed the deadline for official street closure which almost scuppered the whole event.

He bangs on my door, he turns up at my back door, he calls me and harangues me on the phone to the point I've had to tell him I want no direct contact with him as I consider his activity to be harassment (there's tons of other incidents). So when he walked into the party I asked him to leave. He refused and said it was his street and he therefore had every right to be there. I pointed out I'd organised the whole thing. But he was supported by two sets of neighbours who literally did nothing to help or contribute yet argued with me and then went down the pub with him when it came to clearing up (they're not friends yet; he only moved in two months ago and one of them knew of the problems).

I'm so upset that it's ruined what should have been a great day and was an even better success than last year's only because of huge cost to my time and purse. The guy's an entitled bully and I recognise him striding in to the party was part of that behaviour but it still made me cry out of anger and frustration that he was benefitting from my hard work and these two couples who just turned up and had a great time felt they could tell me what to do. AIBU?

And what tension would that have been, @TheyAreMyBhunasPete? Informing someone they were breaking the law? Resulting in those 'eyerolling' rozzers - yep, I'll use whatever language I like - telling the other party they needed to apologise for being in the wrong? Makes total sense.

Yes, literally that. Definitely eyerolling, can even picture the conversation when they got back into the car. Just live your life and stop worrying about what everyone else is doing. When he moves, it will be the next guy I'm sure

He rang police because ri g doorbells are expensive and you took it and refused to give it back .

Then you got the Google dictionary out to try and justify it .

Legally correct isnt always morally decent

I refused to
Deal with one elderly woman who was a constant pain in the arse - she reported today her neighbour was looking at her while she waited for a bus .

She's managed to
Alienate every cop whose ever tried to reason with her because she decides she's right whatever and emails the chief constable 😂.

All she's done is manage to ensure no one wants to talk to her .

Maybe op you really need to
Step back a bit and leave him alone , and you may find you get back to living in peace .

You seemed to expect the street to back you whether right or wrong because you paid for a street party - in future as everyone if they want a party and let everyone contribute however they want

Our street had a party last Sunday . No onE organised it - it was announced on the community group and we all just turned up with a bottle and some bbq food .

Not everything g has to be run with precision or anyone be in charge as that makes it sound like you expect them to be grateful and owe you something
? Clearly the fact not everyone took your side speak volumes.

Back off . Just ignore the guy . No one has to like everyone but if you cause trouble then it escalates and gets stupid very quickly.

And did he apologise ?

Cops cannot force someone to apologise.

You f he did so good on him . And shame on you .

@HairySatsuma you keep referencing the fact that your neighbour has broken the law.

Privacy law is not applicable and even if it was a breach would be a civil not a criminal matter so the police wouldn’t be in the slightest bit interested.

if he’s broken the terms of the lease the n that’s a different matter (although still not one fit the police!) but I find it difficult to believe the lease prohibits the use of a doorbell camera.

As a neighbourhood cop I got really good as smiling and nodding .

Then getting in the car and hissing between gritted teeth "ffs" .....

Ok I'm just gonna say it

You are coming across here like a busy body curtain twitching Interfering battleaxe.

Just leave the guy alone . And ask him to leave you alone .

Stop policing him . I could t give a rats if someone had put a ring doorbell on their door - you do realise even on a normal residence it captures footage from the door to the street ? It's not an offence .
Try and stop worrying about what he is doing .

Rozzers? Do people really say that - now that we're no longer in the 1970s 🙄

Two neighbours who did absolutely nothing to contribute themselves or even say thanks so I didn't think were in the greatest position to pontificate on what was fair.

Maybe they didn’t say thanks because they heard you ask someone to leave the street party being hosted on their own street and found that unacceptable - hence taking him to the pub to show him not everyone on the street was happy to see him excluded?

after calling the police on me twice thinks it's entirely reasonable to turn up at an event that almost didn't happen as a result?

He did NOT stop (or almost stop) the event from happening. YOU choose how to spend your time; YOU chose to spend that time on writing a list of his misdemeanours instead of applying for the permits you needed for the party. You could have waited to write the letter. You could have adjusted another priority in your life in order to get the applications done. You didn’t do any of that. You just want an excuse to blame him.

Yes he's a twat, but you organised a public party in a public area for the street- you were unreasonable causing a scene and trying to make him leave. It could be seen to be quite exclusionary if you, and that you are also part of the issues you've stated. I can understand removing the ring doorbell, but saying you want give it back until he promises not to use it again- again, it's juvenile, sorry. He's not going anywhere- I think you're really going to need to pick your battles here with what's important and what is not so you don't alienate your other neighbours.

Rozzers
The fuzz
Da feds
Boys in blue
Plod
Pigs is always particularly lovely to hear

The young uns who speak with fake gangsta accents favour "da fed bro innit "

OP, you're letting this man live in your head, full time, free of charge. It's not good for you.

Previous posters are right, you're constantly positioning yourself against this man and I do wonder if you had in mind this man's exclusion from the street party and enjoyed the prospect of that? You've been put in your place quite neatly by this man and your best bet now is to stop with the community activities, let somebody else instigate/run them.

The neighbours who left to go to the pub with your nemesis should tell you that your actions were not fair, as much as his brass neck irked you. Don't be that neighbour because I can almost guarantee that your neighbours will be gleefully awaiting the next instalment of entertainment, safe in the knowledge that they're not having a problem with this man.

You also post as if you have the police somewhat 'in your pocket'. You actually don't. Be careful there because if you get a reputation for being a nuisance it's a matter of time before that man outmanoeuvres you. He can do that because he doesn't seem emotional about this whereas you are.

I understand how you feel and this is an anonymous board but I think at the end of it all, you feel aggrieved and 'it's not fair', which is skewing your common sense and perspective.

You both sound as bad as each other

So you think he shouldnt be allowed to attend a party on the street he lives on if you are involved, or be in the communal garden if you want a bbq there but he is the one encroaching on your boundaries?

I bought most of the bunting, put it up, arranged tables/chairs/canopy, decorated the canopy, went round the whole street 4x to get everyone involved, blew up an awesome balloon display, licked paper chains to decorate, contacted neighbours to remove cars, organised music, plates etc. Same as last year only a handful of lovely neighbours helped; it was pretty much all me.

You sound so much like the main character in Ever Decreasing Circles here, it’s almost comical. Even more so when you go on to say that the party was gatecrashed by the one neighbour you don’t like.

That said, unlike Paul in EDC, the guy sounds like charmless prick.

However, not much you can do about him being on the street if that’s where the party is.

Not really sure what's going on here as little of it ties up with what's actually being posted...

Bloke does something against freehold law I know to be civil. As a freeholder I stop him doing it. He calls the police. Two officers immediately turn up in one of the highest knife crime areas where you can't get a ROZZER if someone sets fire to your toes. I tell them he needs permission to do what he wants to do and that either way it's not criminal. THEY AGREE WITH ME. Tell him so. Roll their eyes. Instruct him to apologise and to replace my property. A bunch of people on here want to argue they know best and even though it wasn't me who called the police or has done anything illegal or wasted police time I'm obviously lying and... they know best ignoring the bit about him destroying my property while reporting me for theft of his and breaking the law and wasted police time. He fits a recording device without permission against data protection and freehold law. The same people also know best and everything I'm saying is a lie because I think I'm better than him as a freeholder/royalist/martyr/am not married to a neighbourhood cop/they didn't bother reading the thread/I'm the nuisance even though it's not me ringing the ROZZERS when I don't get my way.

Everyone agrees I had no right to tell him to FO even though he's made my life a misery since last year and turning up was pretty obviously an act of provocation when you can't have your cake and eat it - if you want to keep ringing the ROZZERS/fedz/Sweeney/local constabulary about your neighbour maybe don't try also to benefit from their hard work.

If you don't want people you dont like turning up to your party dont organise a street party on the street they live on

You seem to have a real bee in your bonnet about the fact you are a free holder and he isnt, makes me wonder how much of this is actually been aggravated by you in the first place trying to lord it over him.

Did nobody else contribute anything to the party? They just turned up? What did the invitations say?

Everyone agrees I had no right to tell him to FO even though he's made my life a misery since last year and turning up was pretty obviously an act of provocation when you can't have your cake and eat it - if you want to keep ringing the ROZZERS/fedz/Sweeney/local constabulary about your neighbour maybe don't try also to benefit from their hard work.

I’ll ask you again, as you ignored this point last time - why, if you think he’s a totally unreasonable person out to make your life a misery, why did you expect him to suddenly be tactful and stay away because the party was “all your hard work”?

Why do you keep typing rozzers in caps ?

You are beginning to look slightly unhinged.

As I said - legally correct isn't always morally right.

If you do t want to be friends with him fine .
But dont whine that you have organised a party no one rushed to aid you with in a street that is not private property and the bad man turned up to mingle with HIS neighbours.

What do you want ? A medal ? It sounds like no one actually gave a toss but maybe turned up because they did t want to hurt your feelings and you'd made an effort .

My street party was a relaxed affair and a good time was had by all- certainly no one ended up crying because the other neighbours turned up .

For
Christ sake woman . Take a long li g hard look and have a think . Whose
The pain in the arse here ?

I can almost guarantee that your neighbours will be gleefully awaiting the next instalment of entertainment, safe in the knowledge that they're not having a problem with this man.

Most of the readers of AIBU are awaiting it with equal anticipation.

My professional advice here would be make peace . Agree to disagree , agree to let bygones be bygones and leave each other well alone .

The only person it seems to be affecting negatively is op.

What is "freehold law" ? 🤔

YABU. He doesn't sound like a twat to me. I think he's just sick of you.

There's no such thing as freehold law.