Told to leave a group.

[MobilityCat]

I got into trouble at a meeting of people with a common interest. In the beginning, I explained that I had ADHD and asked that if I said anything inappropriate, please tell me, and I'll apologise and stop.
Guess what happened?. I did say something, and instead of telling me to stop, someone challenged my statement, and it went downhill after that.
A lady sitting next to me said that she also had ADHD, but that I should have recognised a line that I should not have crossed.
I told her that I didn't have that ability, I only knew if I got it wrong by the reaction it produced, good or bad.
She told me that wasn't true. She was also prone to inappropriate speech and behaviour but knew what boundaries she shouldn't cross.
Anyway, I was banned from the group, which was hurtful but not unusual. ADHD has cost me friends, jobs, and strained family relationships all my life.

There are 3 types of ADHD AFAIK; Inattentive, Hyperactive and Combined- the latter a combination of the first two.

OP

Just fucking tell us else we are just going to be arguing with each other in a pointless spiralling circle!

Tell Us What You Said!!!

It does, but only because both contain Deficit. ADD is Attention Deficit Disorder. ADHD (which has Hyperactivity, ADD doesn't) is Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.

One describes only an inability to pay attention.

The other describes an inability to pay attention plus Hyperactivity.

They both have a deficit of attention, but only one includes hyperactivity.

And impulsivity includes struggling to control what you say. Not that the op shouldn’t try but you can’t say that adhd is JUST hyperactivity like you did because it is way more complex than that

I am sorry but I really don't get how ADD can be a sub type of Adhd Without being part of ADHD. that's what sub type means.

Banana is a subtype of fruit but it's still a fruit.

There are two:

ADD

ADHD
ADHD is the first just with Hyperactivity added onto it.

According to the nhs there is adhd and 3 subtypes beneath that diagnosis, based on symptoms. All are types of adhd. That's what sub type means

Man, I love threads like this. 8 pages of posters arguing amongst each other and still no follow up from the OP.

Yes but struggling to control what you say doesn't mean you don't know whether you should say it or not.

Where as with ASD or Autism Spectrum Disorder, many with ASD genuinely don't know what is right or wrong to say.

I have adhd and I think people on this thread are being very harsh to you. When I was diagnosed the consultant said that it was unusual but I actually don’t have the adhd trait where I butt into conversations and say things impulsively. Adhd is a spectrum just like autism is and if anyone tells you how your adhd should or should not be presenting - please use your adhd trait of spontaneity to tell them to mind their own business. Speaking impulsively is one of the most common adhd traits there is. Honestly, I am sorry this has happened to you but quite frankly if this group of people are treating you this way - than they are not your people. Find people who make you feel good to be you. Set up your own group maybe?

There's a big difference between "inappropriate" and "offensive". Inappropriate could be just oversharing, asking personal questions, saying something irrelevant, using a term of endearment to the wrong person etc. I don't see these as being particularly offensive in most situations, certainly not the same thing as racist, sexist or homophobic comments.

For those quibbling over the definition of ADHD, bear in mind that it's finally been recognised symptoms tend to manifest very differently in boys and girls. The reason many fewer girls are diagnosed while still of school age is that that don't show the over the top behaviours that many boys with the condition do, and therefore aren't thought of as hyperactive. They hyperactivity is in the brain, not always in the body, though often this mental hyperactivity shows in things like fiddling with things or leg "jiggling". The hyperactivity of the brain also contributes to the attention deficit, as thoughts move so fast they can switch from one subject to another very quickly.

The 3 Types of ADHD | Understood

A quick google will tell you there are three adhd sub types and ADD is now called Inattentive ADHD - a hyperactive mind rather than a hyperactive body.

OP

Look what has happened already!

Are you sure this is all your fault?

For context I have ADHD and dyslexia.

I went to a writing group, I was the youngest there by about 30 years. I explained I blogged short stories, they told me I wasn't a "proper" writer. Then I admitted to listening to novels instead of listening to instead of reading them, an elderly lady explained she was dyslexic but wouldn't dream of listening to a novel.

I "won" a writing exercise, that annoyed them. Then they proceed to read out their boring, overwritten, sentimental drivel. They mentioned the first group was free, but I may not want to go back.

They weren't my people, simples.

Are you sure this group weren't the badies?

Sometime "inappropriate " means you said something someone higher up in the order didn't agree with.

Don't go back.

This may be true; but unless OP comes back we are all speculating.

OP

Just post what you said please.

*Guess what happened?. I did say something, and instead of telling me to stop, someone challenged my statement, and it went downhill after that.

I told her that I didn't have that ability, I only knew if I got it wrong by the reaction it produced, good or bad.*

Right; so when your comment  was CHALLENGED, according to you that REACTION  should have flagged up to you that  you might have crossed a line. and got something wrong. 

You're not a child needing to be told NO.

Correct.

OP

I realise ADHD comes with social skills issues but unless you also have a Severe or Profound ID you will realise that being tactless is inappropriate.

Just fill us in on what you said!

I have adhd had it done when I was in primary school. And of course I have offended people but I've never not been challenged and guess what as an afukt I learnt how to control it. Adhd impulsively includes butting in conversations spending all your money hyper sexual. Not being offensive!!
I find it offensive when people use my disability as a get out of jail free card when I would never hurt or offend someone

OP

I can only guess you said something very wrong so you are too mortified to admit what it is was; anyway I am going to watch Call The Midwife now so will check later.

To put it into context, for those who asked. As a person of mixed race in a multi racial family, I mentioned that I didn't like the form where I had to describe my racial origin. Since I'm from Africa, I described myself as African, although I'm not a black person as such.

The manager took exception to this and said I'm not African, so I told her she was born in Britain, making her British and I was born in Africa, making me African.

I simply said to the group that if people could choose their pronouns, gender and sensuality, why can't I be African. They became angry and said that I was being racist and told me to go.

I really don't like the idea, "My disability is bigger than yours."
Even if we have the same illness or condition, it's never the same. There may be common symptoms, but they vary, just like a spectrum. Just because you know someone with ADHD, it doesn't mean that our symptoms will be the same, nor the same severity.
I said it was a spectrum, and, lucky me, I'm on the dark side. I don't recognise boundaries and just blurt out stuff.

From what you describe your comments were not inappropriate. You are allowed to say you didn’t feel ok about providing your ethnicity. If you were born in an African country and are mixed race no one has the right to decide your nationality. You weren’t the racist.

How odd that everyone in the group sided with the facilitator. Or did anyone speak up for you? How many people were there?

Unless it was a White Supremacy meeting? 😉

I think you were fine to say that as you were referring to yourself and your own personal preferences.
You were not offensive to anyone from what I can see.