Told to leave a group.

[MobilityCat]

I got into trouble at a meeting of people with a common interest. In the beginning, I explained that I had ADHD and asked that if I said anything inappropriate, please tell me, and I'll apologise and stop.
Guess what happened?. I did say something, and instead of telling me to stop, someone challenged my statement, and it went downhill after that.
A lady sitting next to me said that she also had ADHD, but that I should have recognised a line that I should not have crossed.
I told her that I didn't have that ability, I only knew if I got it wrong by the reaction it produced, good or bad.
She told me that wasn't true. She was also prone to inappropriate speech and behaviour but knew what boundaries she shouldn't cross.
Anyway, I was banned from the group, which was hurtful but not unusual. ADHD has cost me friends, jobs, and strained family relationships all my life.

Jesus Christ. You clearly don't know shit so maybe say nothing?

Excellent post that applies to all of us.

You are very rude and aggressive, @ImthatBoleyngirl . To educate you, ADHD stands for Attention Deficit HYPERACTIVITY Disorder. In order to have ADHD, hyperactivity must be present as the core tenant. The other form, that doesn't have hyperactivity, is ADD or, Attention Deficit Disorder.

Thank you for the link, it backs up what I said.

The symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) can be categorised into 2 types of behavioural problems:

• inattentiveness (difficulty concentrating and focusing)
• hyperactivity and impulsiveness

Many people with ADHD have problems that fall into both these categories, but this is not always the case. For example, around 2 to 3 in 10 people with the condition have problems with concentrating and focusing, but not with hyperactivity or impulsiveness. This form of ADHD is also known as attention deficit disorder (ADD).

That's not true at all. Where are you getting your information?

There are two types of ADHD and people can have a mixture of both. You do NOT have to have hyper activity in order to be diagnosed with ADHD

That's not true at all. Where are you getting your information?

There are two types of ADHD and people can have a mixture of both. You do NOT have to have hyper activity in order to be diagnosed with ADHD

There's a chance that the group overreacted. Sometimes the leaders/organiser can have prejudices of their own which means that they can't accept people who believe the opposite to them.

There was a recent thread where an OP said that she developed an aversion to her husband as he voted Leave. Lots of answers said that they would see it as a red line too which is ironic as they see voting Leave as a sign that the person is intolerant to others.

People can have their own boundaries and red lines which is fine but sometimes they will appear unreasonable to others.

It really depends what you said. If, for example, it was something racist, or a personal insult, YABU. If more a breach of convention, Y probably ANBU.

There's a chance that the group overreacted.

Yes, there is. Until we know what OP said, we can't say.

Asking what the OP said is just vulturing and missing the point.

No, it isnt. If she said something discriminatory the advice would be different compared to just blurting out personal information at the wrong moment. She specifically asked people to tell her to stop if what she said was inappropriate and it sounded like that did happen- someone challenged her. However, it sounds like the OP didnt apologise, it just escalated. Its a very vague scenario thats hard to form an opinion on because how can we tell if they overreacted and were in fact being "unreasonable" (seeing as its been posted specifically IN AIBU) if we have no idea what was actually said?

The H stands for Hyperactivity. Without the Hyperactivity, it is ADD.

It must be really difficult to live your life without the ability to conform, but equally could you have just apologised when challenged?

Can you work with a therapist who specialises in ADHD who can teach you how to navigate these situations better?

I agree with this. You sound like you think you have the right to upset people.. clearly people think otherwise!

Not really sure ADHD gives you permission to say impulsive and offensive things. If you have the impulse control to not say these things in an interview or during an important business meeting then you clearly can implement that elsewhere.

There's a chance that the group overreacted.

And there’s a chance that the group did not overreact, hence why we need to know exactly what the OP said in order to form an opinion on the matter.

OP

Unless you tell us here what you actually said no one can really respond properly.

I can only assume, that you were tactless rather than offensive (racist/called someone fat for example)

I think AFAIK ADHD comes with social skills issues similar to ASD and is not just being hyper and the two conditions overlap a lot.

Anyway post back and give us more info please.

What is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder?Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, shortened to ADHD, is characterised by two core symptom dimensions which are hyperactivity and impulsivity,

What is the difference between ADHD and ADD?Although both are attention deficit disorders, they are not the same thing

https://www.topdoctors.co.uk/medical-articles/adhd-and-add-what-is-the-difference#

Sorry, wrong link. https://www.topdoctors.co.uk/medical-articles/adhd-and-add-what-is-the-difference#

www.lanc.org.uk/related-conditions/attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder/

I was told I had inattentive adhd

www.clinical-partners.co.uk/for-adults/adult-adhd-add/types-of-adhd

It is my understanding from the medics who diagnosed me that they consider ADD a sub type of adhd

Is that wrong?

This nhs link says inattentive adhd is ALSO known as ADD.

that implies it is a sub type of adhd and that either term is appropriate.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/attention-deficit-hyperactivity-disorder-adhd/symptoms/

It would be crucial information if the OP was asking whether it was rude/wrong.
She describes that her strategy (asking to be told) didn't work. It doesn't really matter what exactly she said this time...

You need to say what you said.
And it's not "vulturing" to whoever said that.
No one can judge whether the group overreacted unless you say what you said. And no one can advise you how to avoid future similar scenarios if you don't say what you said.

Homophobic/racist - absolutely right to ban you

Yes, that's right. ADD is a sub type of ADHD. Basically if there is no hyperactivity, it is ADD. That's why they are two different things.

What is vulturing?

But if it's a subtype then it still fits within adhd. That's what subtype means.