To think most women do all of the self care beauty routines I do.

[summerfinn]

Had this conversation with a friend today that seems to think I'm high maintenance. I get my nails done every month and eyebrows and a facial. I also fake tan once a week. Botox every 6 months and get my lips slightly fillled twice a year ( I have naturally thin lips)

I was under the impression most women do these things if you care about your appearance. AIBU to think this ?

*observed this in other, otherwise well-maintained-looking people

If I had the money I likely would! Not injectables though, they terrify me 😂

I do my own gels, eyebrows, hair dye and hair cuts when needed. Don’t both with fake tan it doesn’t suit me.

How does having your eyebrows done save time doing make up

I have spent a lot of time in Ireland and I think all these treatments are far more the norm there. I’m from England but 10 years ago I attended a handful of events there, weddings, christenings, a few parties. I was amazed at the amount of time and money most girls spent on beauty treatments. It was a family members christening (baby) and the mother, godmother and granny all went off for a spray tan, hair professionally put up and professional make-up the morning of the Christening. I consider myself fairly glam, but just wouldn’t PAY for someone to do all that, I’d just do it myself. All feels a bit self indulgent.

get my nails done every month - had them done once in 7 years, hated it. I trim and occasionally paint my nails, my DH is just as good as any manicurist.

eyebrows - last had them waxed 5ish years ago, tinted close to 8 years - I trim occasionally at home with an electric razor & tint myself, only when I remember or feel they have gone beyond this usually happens in summer when the blonde in the gets too light. The rest of the time I use eye shadow if they look too pale. Have started to use serums on my eye lashes though as health issues have made my eyes look drawn, also new to wearing mascara for the same reason.

facial - can’t remember unless chilling with my DDs with 99p peel off masks from home bargains count🤷‍♀️ I have only in the last 2/3 years started to actually cleanse, tone and moisturise daily (I’m 47 and told I look early to mid 30s). I do absolutely love a good nose strip though! I also wear sunscreen all the time, always have as I’m very fair, so more for health rather than cosmetic reasons.

I also fake tan once a week. - Never done it, unless you count using my cousins sun bed in the 90s or sticking some Dove self tan on my legs if I know I’m going to be wearing a dress.

Botox every 6 months and get my lips slightly fillled twice a year ( I have naturally thin lips) - hummm nup, admittedly approaching 50 I’ve thought about Botox but I don’t think I need it or would even if I did. I started taking collagen supplements 6months ago for medical reasons, any skin improvements a bonus.

Hair - my hair cuts have ranged from a couple of years to more recently trying every 8-10 weeks, though last year I managed 2 in the whole year. Admittedly I started having more haircuts after chopping off my long hair to a short bob so needed more maintenance. Colour I use to do at home but as a luxury later in life I’ve enjoyed getting my colour done at the hairdresser as a treat.

I think I care about my appearance but I’m more of a natural look person. Maybe because I had a mother who invested and care about this stuff way too much I went the complete opposite to her. I would absolutely consider you high maintenance OP, but each to their own.

I'm also actually delighted grey and silver hair is in vogue as I'll have the option to be a lazy git about that too!

Loads of my friends do this. I’d do more if I had the time, energy and money.

I do my own nails and eyebrows.

I'm black so don't need fake tan, lip filler or botox.

But saying that, if it makes you feel confidence, who is anyone to judge.?The lip filler sounds painful, though.

Do you ever eat out? Why? Cook at home.
what is wrong with a bit of self indulgence?

My money goes on horses. They look stunning. I look like a scrag end. I’m super happy though. They are definitely my ‘self care’. I do protect my skin with an SPF and my horse’s pink noses too. That’s about as much as I do. Oh and shower every day otherwise I’d smell of eau de stable.

I think it's not very unusual to get your nails and eyebrows done these days. I wouldn't say most women do it, but it's not that rare. Everything else you listed is def unusual. Nothing wrong with that, but no, you are not the standard for women who "care about their appearance" (wtf?!)

Interesting @Moveoverdarlin

I'd be surprised if it was different in Ireland to some parts of the UK - I think perhaps as UK is so much bigger there's great ranges in what people do.

I don't think I'd know anyone who'd have make up professionally done for anything.

For a Christening / Communion / wedding, hair done + tan is pretty standard - just makes everything feel more dressed up! That's definitely not only an Irish thing tho! Getting a blow dry or upstyle for an event is usual everywhere.

When you have very fair hair and very fair brows and lashes you look totally different when you get them tinted and waxed. As a natural fair headed person I have to put powder on my brows and mascara on my lashes just to look normal of a morning so getting them tinted for me means just getting on with things. I think people who assume those of us 'do things' to ourselves have loads of time but its the opposite here and saves me time.

I know people who do that when they're going on holiday. Not on a weekly/monthly basis. Doesn't mean you shouldn't though if you can afford it and it gives you pleasure.

My skin looks young infact my whole face and body do and I’ve done lots of stuff. It’s mostly genetic and keeping out of too much sun. Oh and not smoking or drinking alcohol.

I dont do any of those things.

I used to care about my appearance but literally just did make up daily and hair done every 8-12 weeks.
I have since had a baby I’m now lucky if I actually brush my hair before shoving it up into a scrunchie and I haven worm make up on that long I think it’s all expired! X

I don't do any of those things. Leave me cold. Well maybe a haircut every 6 months or so.

Out of curiosity, how many men do this? I bet none. Because men aren't expected to.

OP
I get all of the above and more no one knows I have had work done, other than my boobs after feeding 4 kids spaniel ears were the only thing I could call them.

I look youthful for my age but certainly not done, I think most posters only think about the women or men that have gone too far not the ones they know nothing about.

Keep doing you and don't worry about the rest

YABU. I’d regard that regime as leading to looking artificial and a bit naff. Also, I’d rather spend the money on travel, books, antique furniture, and my trainer at the gym.

No - I occasionally (3-4 times a year) het nails done as a treat and get treatments like massage, facial, pedicure etc the same frequency. I have hair done every 6-8 weeks. Most people in my circle consider that fairly high maintenance - your regime sounds extreme and I’d assume someone spending that much time and money on their appearance needed to do so for work or something (actress, public figure, MUA, aesthetician etc.)

I wash my face every couple of day. We could be twins!!

Christ no. I mean I know a few who regularly get nails and brows done (I can't afford that) but very few who get regular tans they don't do themselves and certainly not lips or Botox. You can spot the odd one in the playground at pick up that does because they stand out a mile

I agree.

Had this conversation with a friend today that seems to think I'm high maintenance

I also agree with your friend. I'm shallow and vain enough to get my hair done every 5 or 6 weeks. I do my own nails, pluck my own eyebrows and do my own facials. I eat well, don't drink too much and I exercise. No-one I know does botox, fake tan and lip fillers, but quite a few have their nails done.

You must realise that most women don't do fake tan. Just look around you.

Do these treatments all cost a similar amount in Ireland to the uk?

How are Irish women paying for it all? It sounds expensive.