What should I pay my mum for watching my children?

[Buddythecat1]

My mum has agreed to help out and watch my children for the few hours I'll be at work,
Never had to deal with this type of arrangement before so I don't want to offend her but equally don't want to give her heaps (because I'm not going to be raking it in either) (I'll only be on minimum wage at 12 hours but doing 40 in the next week)
How much would you offer?

Please, please don’t turn around and offer her £2 an hour.

It’s great that you both want to work and are actively trying to do it.

But I think in your situation I would use a childminder.

As a single parent I used a childminder for years and although it would be easier having someone come to your home, it is nice because you can drop them off and go.
With someone coming to your home you need to make sure it’s tidy and that there is something prepped for dinner. You also lose privacy and the best bit is that if you don’t like something you can call them up on it or remove them.

There was a thread a few days ago about a grandparent looking after their grandchild once a week and letting her use an iPad but the mum didn’t want this and it makes it very difficult when family are doing you such a big favour.

You could use your mum for a little bit until you are both in the swing of things and until you find a childminder you like.

are these people declaring the money for tax and benefits that they receive? If they are offering a service and being paid in return to make a profit then they should be. Also it means the parent can’t claim childcare support and the grandparent may be breaching other registration about registering if they are charging. If something were to happen in their care while they were charging all sorts of other issues will crop up.

Is she in a position to benefit from:

National Insurance credits for adults who care for a child under 12: fact sheet - GOV.UK (www.gov.uk)

Offer her 2p an hour

@CheshireCat1

Will you be doing it for 4.5 hours every day for 5 days a week every week?
And is there 1 of them or 4 of them?

I always babysit my nieces and nephews for free but if it was every week day, every week for a big chunk of the day then I wouldn’t do it for free.

I wouldn’t actually agree to that big of a commitment anyway as it is a lot to take on every day.

No. Who is going to do that? Not like anyone will find out.

Your daughter is lucky to have you.

Sadly, not all grandparents are like this.

Yes but he wanted to be paid also

Could you get someone to do before school care for your DCs? I've done jobs like this in the past. I would turn up at the house before the parents left for work, give the children their breakfast, make sure they had everything they needed and and then walk them to school - about £10 an hour. I used Care.com and Yoopies to find jobs.

If they are on benefits themselves it is entirely possible they will be found out unless all done in cash. Or if a friend reports them happens all the time. Or if there is an accident at the house and it cones to light its paid childcare. Its no different to earning money other ways and not declaring it

Ah ok my mum wanted cash

Can I just get this clear - are you asking her to do 4.5 hours a day or a week? If it's just the school run, half hour in the morning, it's mad to pay her. But if you are going to, I think it's fine to offer £2.50 day ,frame it as £50 a month. Only thing is unlike professional you will have to be prepared for her sometimes not being able to. If I were you I would pay mum, and once in work start looking for other jobs or put in a request for different shifts further down the line, once you've proven yourself In a few months. In my experience work places are far more willing to accommodate requests from existing staff especially if it's a matter of half hour.

Why are people so shocked that she wants payment?? She is giving up her time to do this. Grandparents have raised their children and this automatic assumption that they will be child minders for free comes across as very selfish. Helping out every now and again, yes, that is to be expected I guess but to expect a person to work full time for free is very presumptuous. OP should ask her what she would expect to be paid?

Blimey, my mum would never have accepted money to look after her grandchildren.

If my parents wanted payment to look after my kids I’d look at getting a childminder instead and use grandparents as occasional babysitters instead.
If you do decide to go with her and pay her per hour, tell her to declare her extra earnings with HMRC

He was going to pay mil out his money he lives with op.

But as i said above if she wants to charge for a service then she needs to declare the earnings and she maybe caught by registration requirements.

I had to pay my mum to do it, minimum wage.

How much would she be earning at work if she wasn't looking after your kids? Friends who've paid for a grandparent to do childcare had to agree to cover the lost earnings.

The mil isn't doing anything you would think it would be nice for her to spend time with her grandchildren rather than picking her nose all day. A lot of women are traumatised by their children that's why they play up after. She doesn't want to look after them.

Then why are you asking? Surely you have your answer.

Probably about the same as I would be
She hasn't worked in years though so it's not as if me asking her to do this is causing her lost earnings

Is it 4.5 hours a day or 4.5 hours total per week ?

Pay your mum? Why? Is she in need? Only in Britain... Find a childminder, at least you can disagree with the way childcare is conducted that way.