To think if you don't like my dogs barking at you get the hell off my drive

[Qantaqa]

I'll start this by saying I am tired and miserable so am in no mood to be reasonable today AT ALL.

I have many dogs. Large dogs. There are dog flaps so they can run in and out as they wish onto the property. I am rural and one of the purposes of the dogs is to alert me to people around, so I aren't bothered by them barking if someone comes to the gate.

The gateway to my drive is set back about 15ft so that I can park the car without having to open the gates and drive in. Its clearly my driveway and separate from the road.

There is this one cyclist who every single time after cycling up the hill stops and pulls into the drive and has a rest. Now he could stop on the other side of the road where there is a public track, or he could cycle for like another 30ft and stop at the entrance to the forest but no he chills in the drive. Every. Single. Time.

The dogs bark at him. He shouts at them to be quite. They obviously ignore him. I used to shout them back in but the last few weeks I haven't bothered because well I'm grumpy.

Today my mum has arrived to visit and the cyclist is yet again in the drive. He's had a bit of a go at her. She's come in mithering at me so I've gone out and told him very rudely that if he doesn't like them barking at him to stop standing on the fucking drive. It got into a bit of a heated discussion before I stormed off. He's going to report me apparently as they are intimidating and its illegal to have a camera and no signs and blah blah blah.

So whilst I might BU to have gone out and created more drama instead of ignoring him AIBU to think if you don't want to be barked at get the fuck off my land?

You are definitely not being unreasonable. I live rural myself actually - in a little village.

And although I only live in a little two-bedroom detached cottage, I do know a number of people who actually do live in quite large 3, and 4 bed cottages and bungalows and houses, (and even larger properties.)

One woman does have 4-5 big dogs, German Shepherds actually, and 9 acres of land, and 2 gorgeous rescue ponies. SHE has a bit of a driveway before her gate too, and on the rare occasion I have paused there, her dogs go batshit, and I am like 'yikes! MOVE!' I certainly do not think 'fucking dogs, how dare you bark at me.' I move on pretty swiftly. I haven't done it for ages, but I did stop there a few times when I first moved here as I forgot myself.

The behaviour of this cyclist does sound like the classic 'entitled wanker' behaviour many of them do display. Not all, but many... the lycra-clad c*nts/the MAMILS. Despicable men. Probably don't lift a finger in the house, and are shit in bed.

I met a delightful bunch of cyclists over the weekend actually. 40 or so, mostly 45 to 75, and a mix of women and men, and even half a dozen in their late teens. (May have been children of a few of the cyclists,) so I am not saying cyclists are ALL wankers. But we all know many of them are. Especially the crowds of MAMILS. The group I saw were very likely just a bunch of people, from several local villages who get together in the same manner as a walking group/rambling group.

I doubt the police will do anything @Qantaqa So you have a camera up with no sign. Big deal ... I am pretty sure MOST people don't have fucking SIGN on their private property when they have CCTV. Most of the time you don't need one as you can see the bloody camera!

One property about a mile from me (on the edge of my village,) has 2 cameras, and they film you as you pass, and make a loud squealing noise for about 10 seconds. The footage is on auto-delete after 5 days, so they don't keep the footage with you on, but it's there if they are broken into, so they can see the burglars.

The squealing would drive me mad tbh, but they have been broken into 3 times since early 2022, so have very tight security in now. (The cameras have been there since January this year.) They are on the edge of the village and are very vulnerable. Rural theft is on the rise these days.

Oh and your dogs are absolutely precious. And also, IGNORE the silly 'you were unreasonable to fucking swear' nonsense! 😆

Also there's no such word as alot, HTH.

You have precisely zero reason to think OPs are not trained to do as she commands.

you don’t like GSDs - we get it. But why are you making this personal? The cyclist is an aggressive wanker. End of.

Not the point of the thread (well - he's an idiot!), but wow, they are gorgeous!

Second this idea! Just make sure that you have it on a timer, so that it will be active at time cf cyclist stops, but not active at other times when postie, visitors etc. might get a nasty wet surprise! Also ensure that, while it will soak him on other side of fence, that all the water actually falls on your property.

That took a turn for the weird.

YANBU when he’s on your drive. But out of curiosity, if he stopped next to your drive, on public land but adjacent to your drive, would your dogs still bark? Because that really pisses me off. I sometimes run past a house with several big dogs in a yard. They bark at me even though I’m on the opposite side of the road and not in their drive. It’s bloody scary because they claw at the fence and look so ferocious, like they’d rip me apart of they could. I think that’s wrong.

YANBU, he is a knob and shouldn't be on your property

Cyclist is completely in the wrong. He is on your land without a valid reason. You told him to leave as is your right. If he comes back after knowing he is not to be there it is then harassment and you can call the police.

Put up a "private property, trespassers will be prosecuted" sign. Then log with 101 as a PP suggested as it is not ok for him to verbally abuse your Mum or lean on your car and this needs reporting. Make sure cameras are pointing correctly and put up a CCTV in use sign. (https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/domestic-cctv-using-cctv-systems-on-your-property/domestic-cctv-using-cctv-systems-on-your-property)

🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

bloody phone!! Explaining, NOT exposing.

Maybug, I'm the cunt who's recommended this golden tome to women suffering from pass-agg tendencies, or abusive men, or horrible bosses, maybe approx 300 times on this site alone:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Woman-Your-Own-Right-Assertiveness/dp/0704334208

What @girlfriend44 doesn't seem to understand is that sweary fuckers are capable of not swearing when they wish to be professional, but simpering dickpanderers who come here purely to tick women off for standing up to men are kinda locked into their defective mindset forevermore.

Shame, innit? 😂

Yanbu, he should not be on your drive. Do you have Strava for running or anything because if so I’d set my Strava running on my phone on a morning you think he might come and when he’s there get a bit closer. You’ll then be able to see on your “fly bys” who it is and send him an arsey message. Hopefully he doesn’t do it anymore though.

Aaaw @PrettyMaybug somebody petty reported your vivid & exemplary use of swear words. Comes to something when women being shut down for using coarse language is perceived as more important than asking them not to keep defending aggressive or abusive men.

I'd get a sign as he's suggested, but it would say Private Drive, This Is Not A Cyclist Rest Area.

@ButterCrackers

what do you think the police can do?

'Mr Plod, there's a cyclist that stops on my driveway at random times & annoys my dogs, so they bark. He frightened my Mum today'

'Yes Madam, what's his name/number/address?'

Errrrrrr

Not to mention they don't have the resources to come out for idiots being annoying...

@Qantaqa thank you for the indulgence. They are gorgeous!!! 😍

Not at all unreasonable ! Part of the reason why anyone has a dog, I think, is for the dog to alert the owner by barking of the presence of someone on the owner's property and your digs are doing just that. If the cyclist is stopping for a breather in your driveway, is he stopping there because there's nowhere else he can stop without putting himself at risk from speeding traffic? Either way, if he's on your land without your permission he's trespassing; can you not put gates at the end of your driveway to stop him getting on to your property? And have you thought to ask the local police for their advice?

I’d have absolutely lost my shit at the fuckwit. How fucking dare he come onto your property, have a go at your mother and shout at your dogs?! I’m so annoyed on your behalf.
We live rurally and have two very big dogs who roam the yard and positively BOOM at anyone who has the audacity to step on their patch. We also have a footpath which runs through a field two whole fields away from the yard, yet we still get walkers cutting corners and attempting to come through the yard. They don’t get very far.

It's just your use of the word mithering is a very Scottish expression .

Salford / Manchester / Lancashire - very common here too.

It's exactly this.The entitled MAMIL.
Motion sensor sprinklers.

Doubt he would have had a go at a man.

If the cyclist is stopping for a breather in your driveway, is he stopping there because there's nowhere else he can stop without putting himself at risk from speeding traffic?

She says in the OP that there are a couple of nearby alternatives.

THIS> He would not have had a go at a man. Typical entitled MAMIL!

I noticed that my comment has gone. Bit weird as it wasn't an abusive comment and I was only messing about. I also wasn't swearing at anyone, I just used the c-bomb in a jokey manner. Guess someone has had a sense of humour by-pass, as it was very clearly a joke post. The poster correcting another poster's spelling has had their post deleted too. So someone is on a mission today!

Guess we women need to go on that assertiveness course after all, and should know our place, and be meek iccle wimmin who never swear. Leave that to da big strong menz!

I'm out, as obviously someone got out of the wrong side of bed today. THIS post will very be deleted in a minute.

As you say, it's disgusting that (some) people are more upset about laydeeez swearing than they are by women being verbally abused by men on their own property. That tells me a lot about THEM.

I'm out!

@Wavescrashingonthebeach

I used to as a young child. A GSD savaged & killed my Nana's (on lead) wee poodle. I wasn't there, but it affected me. then as an adult one bailed me up in our communal carpark, thought I was dinner for sure. Eventually the dumb fuck neighbour came out and got him, had to physically drag him away, would not be called off/in. Pretty scary.

However I've known so many lively ones that as a breed they don't bother me anymore. I just think they're gorgeous.

I LOVE big dogs though. and I'm
probably not as cautious as I should be.

what do you think the police can do?

They can give advice over the phone, and don't necessarily need a name let alone an address.
It may be worth doing if there's a likelihood that the situation escalates or if the other party makes a complaint.