To Have "Told Off" Someone's Child?

[FooFighter99]

Just trying to gauge opinion but I'm pretty sure I wasn't BU

Walking home from school this afternoon having picked DD up, casually strolling through the estate to get home, chatting with another mum and her kids as they absolutely love our dog when I notice a young boy who's in front of us but walking about 5 paces behind his mum and possibly his older brother, and he's spitting on the floor with every other step

He's obviously got sweets in his mouth as the spit is bright red/pink and we're then having to dodge round it so we don't walk in it (gross) cos it'll be sticky and disgusting and I don't want someone else's spit all over my shoes and/or dogs paws

I said "ew can you stop spitting" in a jokey/normal tone, didn't raise my voice, wasn't angry or confronting, just wanted him to stop spitting on the pavement

His mum turned round and said "did you just tell my kid off?" to which I replied, "well, he's spitting all over the floor" and she responded by telling my to mind my own business and concentrate on my own kid - I responded by pointing out that my child wasn't spitting everywhere... again, didn't raise my voice, didn't get angry or animated but she kept chunnering all the way down the road till they eventually turned off onto their estate

Now, I'm sorry, actually not sorry in the slightest but if my DD had been the one spitting and another mum had pulled her up on it, I would have also told DD off for spitting, not the other mum for saying something

And seriously, spitting is fucking disgusting and she ought to teach her child some manners

YADNBU. It takes a village etc

I used to know a father who was like this. His kids (when they were small) were little buggers and if someone dared say something (I was witness to two occasions) he used to have a right go at them. It was absolutely mortifying.

I think I would have crossed the road and avoided the conflict. Or said excuse me so that you could get past them and move on. Pick your battles and save your energy.

It’s against the law to spit on the pavement in the UK. He and or his mother could have been fined

Come on, are you serious? Do you really imagine that the child has only just started doing this? His mother doesn't care what he does.
I hate seeing people spit, it makes me retch.

I’d love to see more people get fined for spitting

maybe then there wouldn’t be so much of it about

@Iaintsadwhenugotobed

they are just a kid

i don’t care

adult spit, kid spit, whatever I don’t want it on the pavement

there is no need for it. They shouldn’t be doing it. It’s rank.

END OF.

Loads of people think having dogs is rank and don’t want them on the pavement. U can’t choose what is rank for everyone. Yes spit is not nice but it’s not on you to say anything to children. The mum yes u can say something. :)

@Iaintsadwhenugotobed

erm I think most people think spitting is rank. It’s dirty and unhygienic. And looks gross when you see gobs of it all over the pavement.

it not on you to say who is people can and cannot address the matter with. op politely asked the child to stop spitting. No problem with that.

Have u ever stepped in spit and had to wash ur shoe? 😂
u can’t go round saying anything to people’s kids when ur walking around with a dog imo
we can agree to disagree

I bet your child spits in the street. And you nod approvingly.

@Iaintsadwhenugotobed

I can if I want , so can op

also i don’t have a dog
and if I did I would clean up its mess from the pavement
when kids or adults spit they leave it there don’t they

I think some mothers think their kids can do no wrong and can't take criticism well. A few years ago I was in a supermarket. There was a mother with a little girl in the shopping trolley and a boy walking, running around as she shopped. The mother looked quite harassed. I saw the boy take hold of the little girls arm and he was just about to sink his teeth into her! I yelled 'No don't do that!' and it stopped him in his tracks. His mother turned on me and snarled at me 'Are you criticising my parenting skills? I told her no but what I saw the boy about to do while her back was turned. The mother continued by telling me to mind my own business. I couldn't have cared less about the mother but I was concerned about the little girl. I just shook my head and walked away!

that's your opinion, would not be happy with spitting or swearing from my child

I bet u don’t even get what I said. I said tell the kids mum. I would most definitely tell my kids to stop if it was me but I’d be annoyed if someone approached my bloody CHILD! U have no idea what effect that would have on them if they have needs etc. which I why I said tell the parents. Please go about ur day love… maybe sit under a bridge

Never seen anyone clean up dog pee 🤷🏻‍♀️
ive jus given my opinion I dont know why u are so pressed lol. If u spoke to my child and they had needs or was very sensitive I’d report you. But each to their own.

@Iaintsadwhenugotobed

most dogs don’t piss right in the middle of the pavement where everyone walks. They cock their leg up up against a lamppost or a grass verge
When people spit they leave gobs of phlegm and spit right where people are walking
rank

@Iaintsadwhenugotobed

also lol who exactly would you be reporting to and what would you expect them to do? Could they come and arrest OP for asking a child to stop spitting do you think?

Still is doing it. On the pavement where everyone needs to walk. Kids touch lampposts and all sorts. Ur really Mili Ming it. Some human spit isn’t worse than dog poo/pee/drool/hair etc etc
agree they shouldn’t be spitting. Just not anyone’s place to say it to children.
also if u approached a child WITH a dog. Very intimidating I’d be reporting to the school.

Milking**

We don't know do we 🤷 that is the point i am trying to make, We don't know if the mother does not care, we don't know if the child has additional needs we don't know for sure. We all agree spitting is disgusting but some of the threads I see are all about mum bashing when we don't know the mother, don't know the needs of the child or the full facts of the situation her parenting skills may be awful 😕 the point is WE DONT KNOW! The fact OP said she was walking 5 paces in front for whatever reason (that again we don't know) so the mother did not see, We don't know if she heard yes spitting is disgusting regardless of age, child adult but the fact the OP said about the sweet in his mouth made me think. At a push how old was the child OP you said not a baby ?

And what exactly do you think the school will do if you report this to them?? They are not going to be impressed with a mum who complains that another mum asked their child not to spit in the street, are they?

YANBU, OP. Spitting is really gross. I confess that I probably wouldn’t have said anything myself, though.

I totally agree dogs are gross and I would prefer they didn't exist, dog wee and poo and hair, they smell awful when nearby even outside but spitting is still bad, in fact illegal and fineable and also spreads diseases. Everyone should tell anyone off who spits, even adults.

And imagine calling the school to complain! That'd be hilarious in the staff room. They'd probably send a thank you card and gift to the parent who told off your child. 😂

Lol some of you are so old school and it shows! In this day and age u do not approach children. And to the thing about reporting to the school they would in fact take it seriously as a parent has approached a child with a dog (danger) potentially and probably say something. No one is saying it is nice to spit fml 🤦🏻‍♀️ spit is disgusting dogs are disgusting. But the same way no one should approach u for wanting and keeping a dog. U can’t tell other people what is acceptable on the pavement either especially not children!